Thanks for all the support.
I am now on day 11 since stopping the morphine and the fentanyl patch. I haven't taken the suboxone since Wenesday a.m. and I have been in constant intolerable pain since.
I somehow managed to get myself to my lidocaine infusion yesterday afternoon. I can have these once a week. But as I feared. Alone it didn't even give me enough relief to believe I could tolerate the drive back home. I guess I knew I could - but it is so hard to do.
I know my pain is much better managed when I am moving. Running actually would take my pain away when nothing else worked. But I was much stronger then. Now, my MS has taken a huge step backwards.
Walking was a bit scary yesterday. It is not easy for me today, but I actually believe it may be better. I know the lidocaine, oddly, does more for me than just help manage my pain.
I have tried many options to control my pain now for years. I don't know what I will do now and I am wrestling with that. I know I have to be certain the pain I have still isn't at levels exagarrated by the withdrawal. This is an impossible period of time.
The rehab doctor that helped me get off the last of the morphine and fentanyl patch told me he believed he presribed enough of a suboxone taper I shouldn't notice much more withdrawal from the fentanyl - or something like that. I was in pretty bad shape when I listened to the message.
TurningaNewleaf-I will email you. Thank you for posting.
Missing_Me
HI Missing.... I just came off the fentanyl patch 23 days ago. I hope I can help you. Please private message me if you like or you can copy/paste this into the Substance Abuse Addiction community. That is where I got most of my help. I can tell you what to expect although I don't have MS and I commend you for taking this hard fight for your life back. You can do it !!! I, did not, have suboxone to use but I did use 1 7.5/750 vicodin every 6 hours. It was hard, I won't lie. I can elaborate more if you like. You can also look through my posts. Just click on my name and you can see my posts. If there is anything I can do to help, please ask.
You are brave. That may not help you through this but know that we are thinking of you. I have been searching for options for you but as you know you are so unique.
I agree with Mollyrae that you are the only person I know with MS that has decided to go this route. And I also agree, don't be a hero. Although I know the issues you felt were caused by the opiates are more than you want to tolerate. We are here to help as much as we can but I'm afraid our words are not enough for you at this very difficult time. Keep close contact with your physicians.
Our MS Community may be able to offer you more insight. I cannot imagine what you must be going through and once again my heart goes out to you.
Please Take Care,
Tuck
I have to comend you and quite honestly think you're incredibly strong willed. I cannot fathom what you're enduring all these days...I can only imagine from what I've been through.
I truly hope that you can cope with the MS without the help of opiates. You are the only person that I know of that has been able to do this.
Stay strong and remember...If at some point in your life with MS you need to re-medicate, don't be a hero, take the meds and rest.
All my best to you,
Mollyrae