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Lost my mind. But found my hope

I have endometriosis. And the pain is overwhelmingly aggressive through out the month. It doesn't seem I'm like people my age. I'm 24 and I have a 9 month old daughter. I noticed that my pain has gotten worse and uncontrollably annoying. My motivation is low and over the last five years I notice a big difference in what I accomplish and how much I apply myself to my work and hobbies. I draw and paint. I also crochet and play guitar. These hobbies of mine have been put on hold. Even though they don't require much movement. I talked to my doctor about three years ago and explained that I'm becoming depressed and not looking forward to life because the pain is real and getting bad. He has only been putting me on antidepressant one after the other. I think I tried all of them. Well as of 6 months ago. I tried one of my mother's tramadol. She used them for her back pain but claimed they don't work. When I took it. It was like I never had endometriosis. I had motivation to draw and I felt inspired. It was the longest I ever went without thinking of pain. I told my doctor this but he did nothing about it. He just gave me busbar for anxiety told me tramadol can be addictive and gave me Motrin. So after a week I decided to take control and I found tramadol on the streets. I've been buying about 60 a month and I take it twice a day. I can't tell my doctor this cause what I'm doing is really illegal and it makes me feel guilty like I'm some addict. But I never took more then two. I have no bad side effects. And I don't feel high when I take them. I went from 6 Motrin a day to 2 tramadol a day. I don't know what to do. I should stop buying them off the streets. But I'm not spoken serious and it's my body and the benefit out weighs the cost. I can work and wake up each day with out fear and depression. Why has my doctor failed to help me even after all my visits and research. My mom said you have to be in pain for years and years before the doctor prescribes me anything effective. But I know that's not true. I know people who lie about pain and got tramadol and those are the ones who sell it to me. It's sick and I'm so frustrated that I suffered for so long. And tried so many things. But the one thing that helps I can't have prescribed to me. I have no history of substance abuse and a huge history of family depression . So no matter what I tell my doctor he always thinks I'm just clinically depressed and depression causes pain to feel worse. I could get medical marijuana but I don't want to get high or stoned. I tried pot before and it does not help the pain. It's gross and smells awful. Plus I have a child. Why would my doctor think pot is better then a synthetic opioid. ??



This discussion is related to Tramadol for endometriosis.
6 Responses
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7721494 tn?1431627964
Not certain where you are getting your information, but tramadol is a synthetic opioid that acts on mu-opioid receptors (pain), as well as delta-opioid receptors. It also mildly inhibits the reuptake of serotonin, similar to SSRI antidepressants.

Both hydrocodone and oxycodone are also synthetic opioids that act solely on the mu-opioid receptor.

All three medications, tramadol, hydrocodone, and oxycodone will cause opioid dependence with extended use, which will cause withdrawal symptoms on discontinuing the medication, and withdrawal from tramadol is no easier than withdrawal from hydrocodone. The severity of withdrawal symptoms increase with doseage and the length of time one has used the medication.

Regardless, if tramadol is effective for your pain syndrome, by all means, use the medication. A good pain doctor can help you manage the withdrawal symptoms of any narcotic, and wean you slowly down to a minimum dose or zero dose when needed.

Many studies have been done on the susceptibility of chronic pain patients to develop opioid addition behaviors vs. non-pain patients. Study after study have demonstrated that opiate and opioid medications, when taken as directed for the treatment of chronic pain, do not necessarily lead to addictive behaviors.

Don't let your fear of effective medications prevent you from receiving adequate pain control. Talk about your concerns with your pain doctors and family members. There is no evidence that drug addiction, unlike alcoholism, runs in families.

The risks of untreated pain developing into more severe and debilitating pain syndromes increase with time. Ask your doctor to explain how untreated pain leads to chronic pain syndrome.

Best wishes.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Yes thank you. I feel like this is the first time someone actually heard what I'm saying. The pain is real and causes such emotional pain too. I tried everything. It's going to be a while before I'm set up with a specialist. I recently started looking for a new doctor. I'm a single parent and between work and school I can not be put on hold again. It's a terrible thing I'm doing. But I've been trying to make it right. I know I will not abuse them. My sister's husband use to abuse hard pain killers. He put his family in such a bad spot in life. He would let his wife and children go without food and electricity because he had to buy oxycotten. So I knew that I never wanted to do anything hard. I was attracted to tramadol because it's synthetic and the withdraws are lighter then other opiates used. I knew the risk. And I know one day I'm going to be cured. Well I pray that I will. So if I find a doctor to help me manage my pain. I will not accept him to prescribe morphine or vicodin. Because I educated myself. And ill always put my health first. I'm trying to not feel pain, till more research is done. I also signed up for the study. I found a flyer explaining a endometriosis study. I'm really excited to be apart of it. So after I find a new doctor, he will see how passionate I am and I deserve to be tooken serious.
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Avatar universal
I too understand the pain you're going through because I had endometriosis myself as a young woman. The pain is overwhelming. This was over 25 years ago and my gynecologist never mentioned pain medication to help. We tried the only two treatments that were available at the time but they failed and I eventually had to have a complete hysterectomy.
I highly recommend that you find a pain specialist. With many of the pain medication being moved up to class 2 most Drs will not prescibe them at all. Almost all Drs the will help you with your pain in any way would be a specialist.
I wish I could give you more advice but I'm new to pain management myself and I'm waiting to to see a pain management Dr right now because my primary Dr told me last month she would no longer be prescribing pain medication to anyone.
Ask your primary or your gynecologist if they can recommend a pain clinic or specialist. You can't keep buying your medication from friends for many reasons. I do feel so awful for you because I've been there with this kind of pain and no relief at all.  
We're always here to help and support you anyway we can.
Helpful - 0
9880688 tn?1414115647
Hi and Welcome....Stick with Lulu above...she knows SO much, is very kind, patient and smart.  She is right that you will be moved to another forum but DO send her a PM...you can't go wrong listening to her advice....she's been there and KNOWS what you are going through.

Hugz and prayers
Helpful - 0
1926359 tn?1331588139
BTW-

Needing pain control DOES NOT make you an addict.  I'm sorry you have had to buy off the streets which makes you feel like an addict.
I did become addicted to the meds, and I misused them and I paid a high price for this.  But I have learned through intense recovery work how to manage my pain, emotional and physical.  Your post will probably get moved to another forum, so as I said PM me for info.
Helpful - 0
1926359 tn?1331588139
Hi Sweetie and Welcome to the Forum-

It must be a stroke of fate that I just logged on and read your post.  I have severe endometriosis that took a long time to diagnose.  I had complete pelvic reconstruction excision surgery in 2010, by that time I was on massive doses of opiates after being in debilitating pain for 6 years.  It was very hard coming off the drugs.  I realized I had been using them to numb not only the physical pain, but the emotional pain as well.  I got clean in December of 2011 and did a lot of recovery work.  Therapy like EMDR for PTSD and CBT, as well as SMART recovery.  I was amazed to find that after 1 month clean I was in less pain than I had been in for years.  I lived the best life, doing yoga six days a week, eating super healthy, and being pain free until Oct.2013 when my symptoms began to return, slow at first and then like a freight train.  I finally had to give in and take pain meds after trying everything else.  I was debilitated by pain.  I just had my second excision surgery 10 days ago and am in a world of hurt.

Endo is a terrible disease.  It is one of the most painful conditions there is and MUST be treated properly.  Before I was properly diagnosed and had a doctor that understood I was treated poorly as well.  They think it's all in your head and it's not painful but that is NOT TRUE.
You need treatment.  Have you had a lap yet?  You need to see an excision surgeon.  You need proper pain control until you do.  I know that you are suffering but don't self-medicate.  Fight to find a doctor who will help you manage.
Endo causes depression because of living in terrible pain.  I know that opiates are the only thing that helps the pain.  Some people have luck with taking hormones...Not me.  You need and deserve proper pain management until you can see a surgeon.
Check out Endometriopolus.com to find a good surgeon in your area.  Join the support groups on Facebook and Twitter.  And find a doc who will help you manage your pain until you can get the surgical help you need.
Feel free to PM me any time.  You are not alone.
Bless-
Lu
Helpful - 0
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