Hello this is my first time writing so a bit of background. This could get long so I apologize I am just so scared and upset. I fractured my back and had 2 back surgeries within 4 months of each other. Still did not heal right damage such that not a candidate for fusion due to major limitations it would cause. It's been 2 years and I had to move to another state so had to get a new doctor. Brought in print out from pharmacy to show what I was getting to manage my pain along with my mountain of scans. Was told immediately would not give me certain meds so I agreed to switch to meds would write. Was told would only give limited Vicodin about half what I was getting.... Didn't have much choice so agreed to limited dosage. Had to sign an agreement not to see ANY other doctor including PMP or this dr would no longer see me at all. New town is very small not a lot of doctors so agreed. New doctor got me so freaked about about taking any meds that I started skipping doses seeing how long I could stand the pain. I cut pills in half to stretch what meds I did get to make them last longer and get a bit of relief rather then none at all. Pack my back in ice so I can try and sleep, take hot showers, slather on Bengay, constantly convince myself the pains really not that bad that I can handle it. So go back to see new doctor and she gives me a urine test which comes back stating my pain med levels are too low. How this is even possible i don't know since i took medication the day before but did not take bedtime meds or morning meds cuz have to take those with food and I had to fast for 12 hours for bloodwork. So now dr refuses to write any pain meds at all says I broke the contract.... What the heck? I thought they would be happy I am basically torturing myself to use as few pain pills as I possibly can! New doctor told me that they would no longer write any pain med scripts for me ever but if I go somewhere else they won't see me for any of my other medical needs either and will drop me as a patient. I would like to try to go to a PMP but I understand I need a referral from a doctor to get in to see one. I feel so screwed over. I mean I agreed to less pain meds, got freaked out about signing form stating would not take more, would have to let them randomly test me and listened to loads on how bad pain meds are so I adjusted and tried to take as little as possible and am now being punished for it. I don't know what to do my back is not fixable, my left foot basically feels like its on fire all the time and my toes twitch and move independently and I get Charlie horse type spasms in my back, leg and foot. Some days I can barely walk the sciatic pain is so bad yet have been made to feel like a criminal. I know there no hope at this point for help from the medical profession and pain meds so is there any medication that is not considered "bad" out there that I might be able to convince this doctor to give me? I am already taking Advil in the search for some relief but it doesn't even touch the sciatic pain and spasms. Shouldn't a doctor give you a chance before doing this to you? I had no idea if I tried to see if I could live with less meds they would cut me off entirely.
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