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Avatar universal

9 year old with blankie and mothers teddy bear.

My daughter is 9 and a half now and I have full custody of my 2 girls 9 and 11 (separated in 2008 divorced in 2010).  I am concerned not so much that she has these (bears and blankie) but that her mother seems to be using these items to manipulate my 9 year old.
My daughter only uses them at night and some times carries them around the house in the morning.  My Daughter visits with her mother on weekends and my ex-wife sprays (bears and the blankie) them with her perfume every week.  When that was not good enough she gave her a bottle of her own to spray anytime she wants in my house.
I heard from my daughter after this weekend she was laying in bed with them crying saying she missed them so much and wants them back.  This is upsetting to the girls and not sure what to do about it.  The girls wanted to come live with me and they had there input.  Been through the court thing twice and not wanting to do it again.  I care a lot about all my kids and want they to grow up well balance adults but this seems to me to be mind games and manipulation...   Please give me some input.
Best Answer
1622527 tn?1301644622
hi its nice to hear from a dad so caring ,, im seperated my self ,,   i feel she maybe spraying the teddies in order to keep her sent on , maybe she,s also scarred of the girls losing touch with her ,,during the week ,, and thats why she gave them something to cling on to , how do your girls feel ,,   children should,nt be pawned , and ye did not devorce them ,,but you have to really ask your self why they wanted to live with you in full custody and not thier mother ,, your a great dad ,,
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1622527 tn?1301644622
hi how is your girl now , and the situtation of her blankie
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I want what is best for my daughter and all my kids.  I understand what you are saying.
I have offered mid week visits but Mother does not want them.  She says she wants to get a job but has not found one in 2 1/2 half years.  She gave the kids up.  It was a bad situation.  It was very stressful to live there ( the kids use to live with her)  now it is fun time as there is no day to day stress only weekend fun.   I think this is confusing at least.  
I would still be married to her if she did not leave me for another man.  I have moved on and re-married now.  I could never do it without my new wife she is a God send.
Helpful - 0
535822 tn?1443976780
I believe that children need both parents in their life and I sympathise with your daughters and their mom, it must be very hard, I dont see this as mannipulation at all ,I see it as simple emotional need./love  is it possible for them to visit with her more, having a blankie and a teddy is their way of expressing they need their mom in their lives, I am touched she sprayed perfume so they could smell her ..Sometimes love comes before balance in my opinion .loosen up a bit and walk in their shoes ...
Helpful - 0
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