How do I tell my 12 yr old son who his real father is?

[allycat79]

When I was 17 I had a on/off again boyfriend.  On the last "off" I had been with another man.  My boyfriend and I got back together and I found out I was pregnant.  Being an ignorant teen I assumed man #2 was the father and told both this.  Man #2 and I married and the on/off again married and moved across the country.  I divorced a few years later.  When my son was 5 someone told my ex-husband that my son looked a lot like my ex-boyfriend.  I asked my ex-husband if he wanted a DNA test and he said no and wanted to never talk about it again. I chose to keep things the way they had been in fear of disrupting my sons life and possibly hurting the other mans marriage.  A few months ago my old boyfriend moved back, now divorced and we started dating. I decided I no longer could keep this awful secret.  We had a home DNA test done (my son was swabbed while asleep) and my son is in fact my old/new boyfriends son.  We have told my ex-husband and have decided we are going to work as team to be there for our son.  We all have his best interest at heart and are willing to do anything and everything to make this as 'easy' as possible for him.  My son just adores the father he has known and my new boyfriend.  We had planned on building the relationships and then telling him but my ex-husband has recently told a handful of people and I am worried that we need to do this sooner rather than later so he dosen't hear this second hand.  How do you tell a 12 yr old boy that you have really messed things up and he now has two fathers?  Any advice?

[margypops]

Make it sound positive its a good thing having 2 Dads even if its a bit complicated ,does the real Dad want to see him, I guess if he is your Bf again he will see him. His real Dad also his step dad ,should make sure they have quality time together, sports, Games guy stuff, so they bond, children are very willing usually want to please all. Lucky boy having 2 great Dads ...