Parenting Children (6-12) Community
My heart is breaking
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My heart is breaking


I just found out my 13 year old daughter has been cutting herself.Can someone please help me so i can help her.I believe she just started doing this.I want to help her ,i don't know what to say to her,i can't seem to say anything right to her!! Please help me!!Ilove my daughter!!
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Avatar_f_tn
.i was like ur daughter when i was younger.i used to cut becuz i was upset w my self. i was never good enough..the release i felt whilin doin it was like a junkie doin drugs....my mom took all the knifes n sharp objects and hide them..it just made me wanna do it more...have u tried talkin to her?ask why she does it?plus my mom started checkin me every night to make sure i didnt have any new cuts...i finally saw a dr n was told im bipolar n had depression n was put on meds lil by lil the cuttin stopped...im so sorry ur goin threw this...show her lots of love n talk to her....dont yellor be upset w her its her way to coop,she needs to  learn new ways to coop w life...  or it could just be a faze.......or shes tryin to get attention..is she cuttin wear u can see it or r the cuts hidden?
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Avatar_f_tn
.i was like ur daughter when i was younger.i used to cut becuz i was upset w my self. i was never good enough..the release i felt whilin doin it was like a junkie doin drugs....my mom took all the knifes n sharp objects and hide them..it just made me wanna do it more...have u tried talkin to her?ask why she does it?plus my mom started checkin me every night to make sure i didnt have any new cuts...i finally saw a dr n was told im bipolar n had depression n was put on meds lil by lil the cuttin stopped...im so sorry ur goin threw this...show her lots of love n talk to her....dont yellor be upset w her its her way to coop,she needs to  learn new ways to coop w life...  or it could just be a faze.......or shes tryin to get attention..is she cuttin wear u can see it or r the cuts hidden?
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4368956_tn?1357409671
Have a talk with her and ask her y with no judement. Also I agree she needs to see a doc so it doesnt get worse. My brother used to cut now hes a police officier. My prayers go out to you.
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4275750_tn?1376008359
Thank you so much for your comment!!Yes, im trying to controll myself,,very hard!! Just don't understand her,she has always been some different, not bad just never seemed to take up with other people even when she was a baby.She doesn't like you to touch her unless she gives you the ok. I gave her a week to stop.i told her i will be checking you head to toe.She was ok with that,i think someone from school is doing this and she showed her.She  is doing were she could get cought,so that did make me think she doing it for attention.Thank you again.
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4275750_tn?1376008359
Thanks for your comment.Glad everything turned out well for your brother.
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4368956_tn?1357409671
I also wanted to let you no it might not be a home problem she might have serious issues with school. My bro used to come home mad and really distant, and it was because he was being seriously bullied. He is handsome and had a really high personality but people picked on him alot. it might be good to talk to her teachers and see if she notice a change in her. My brother started cutting cuz he hated how he was being treated in school, and even had some sucide attempts. If it gets worse I would ask her if she wants to change schools if she says yes, then u no its a problem there at school. It only got better for my bro after he graduated . I really wish u the best I no this has to be very difficult.
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535822_tn?1389452880
I would say you dd is upset by something and feels out of control,a word with your doctor may help. Could she be friends with other gals who are doing similar , very often kids copy each other .
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Avatar_f_tn
My younger cousin just turned 15, and she has been cutting and self-harming for a couple of years.

Please, please do not try to handle this 100% on your own. Your daughter needs professional help. It was only once her cutting had been cut that my cousin was properly diagnosed with bipolar disorder and severe anxiety issues. There is no way a parent can handle this on their own. I myself had an eating disorder as a teenager, and I know from experience that even the best intentions can backfire. You want to help your daughter, but she needs someone who is professionally capable of evaluating her and giving her the treatment that is appropriate.

I don't mean to scare you, but your daughter needs to be seen by a doctor (preferably one who is experienced in or specializes in these types of issues - you would be amazed how many docs still don't take teenage girls and body issues seriously). I never got help and was very luck that as I got older I was able to handle many of my issues on my own. Not everyone is so lucky, though - my little cousin is in her second stint in a psychiatric hospital this year and has recently been moved to a long-term facility for at least a year. Again, I don't want to panic you, but only emphasize that your daughter's self-harm could be the first indication of a much deeper problem. You need to be there for her, and listen to her, and give her as much support as you can. But please don't take the risk of trying to handle this on your own.
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