This patient support community is for discussions relating to the challenges of parenting children (age 6-12), including physical development, handling school & classes, emotional development, cognitive development, and games and activities.
My son is never satisfied. I have been spending the summer trying to occupy him and have fun. For example, we went bowling today and had a barbecue with friends. We came home at 800 and figured the kids would be tired and settle down. My 9 year old immediately went on the computer and starting looking up tickets for a baseball game this month. He would not give up on the subject and was angry with us that we were not being final about the dates. He makes the entire night difficult doing this .He does this all the time. Another example was , he lost his hat and once he lost it no matter how much fun we had that day , we would get home and he would start saying he was mad we didnt go to the mall to replace the hat. So, every night no matter what type of fun or event we did with him, he will not be satisfied and try to argue about something he wants. He has done this with all sorts of items...wanting a 100 dollar basketball, video game , dr. dre beats ,cell phones.Also,my husband can play wiffle ball with him for 2 hours and as soon as they come in , he is sulking.Not good enough.I have started taking long walks with him just to try and get his mind off doing this. He will not go to bed until late and will be in my room and sits there sulking and talking . I have told him we have rules and needs to go to bed, but no matter how much I repeat them he not understanding boundaries. Also, I have asked him to find something to occupy himself in the house ...I spend all day with him and he just follows me around. He will not watch movies or tv, unless a sports game is on....he will not read....he just follows me! He has friends but will not go to camp and he does not want to invite anyone over. He is very quiet and does not want the interaction unless it is sports related. I am starting to think there is some reason for this and it is atypical of what kids do. What is this ...this is the second summer this is happening.
He sounds like he's pretty perfectionistic and a little bit obsessive, like he doesn't have a broader perspective into which to slot a lost hat or an interest in going to a ball game. I've been working with my son on realizing that even the most wealthy or well-supported person in the world doesn't get what he wants every minute of the day, and that a good life skill to have is the ability to remember the good things one does get, and to think of the ones one got yesterday and other ones that might come tomorrow, when things don't go one's way in a particular instance.
It might be helpful to you to talk to a children's therapist about this tendency, just to learn some suggestions about how to work with your child on his low tolerance for frustration and his need for instant gratification. It's not the end of the world to be like this at 9, but it will be harder and harder on him as he becomes an adult if he still has this tendency with no tools to use for self-calming and being philosophical.
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