To Medicate or Not to Medicate thats the question...

[LizardLiz]

My daughter has been a VERY active child since she was born. She walked, talked and did everything extremely early... She was tested at 3 years old for preschool and scored at a 5 year old level. Now she is 6 and in kindergarten. I received phone calls and e-mails from her teacher and the school principal at least 2 or 3 times a week. Complaints such as skipping class to hide/eat candy in the bathroom, running away from the teachers, talking back, punching/hitting other classmates (is on the bully list), throwing food at lunchtime, will not remain quiet during class, stuffing paper towels in the toilet to cause it to overflow and the list goes on and on... I do not "spank" I take TV/toys away and time out for punishment. Which she could careless about when done. At school she is in made to sit alone and not allowed to participate in movie day or special events for punishment. She told me she likes to sit alone and the movies are STUPID! When asked how her day was her response is "Horrible" When asked why she makes up stories such as "The kids all lined up and took turns kicking her one by one and even the teacher joined in!" I have had meetings with her teacher and it is all behavior issues!! She is in the highest reading/math class and she finishes her work so early she has to draw pictures on the other side of the worksheet till the other kids are done. I asked about moving her up a grade but never heard anything back. My last straw was yesterday when the principal called to inform me she stomped on a girls foot and punched a boy in the back! He told me that the parents are upset and he wanted to "save" me from paying a fine! I just don't know what to do? My family and I keep her active she has fun days with her aunt and grammy Tuesday and Thursdays after school, pap takes her to karate class every mon and wed. I am off on Fridays so we will get a movie/hang out or go out to eat. She does hit my family (mom, dad, sister etc) but never me or her 2 year old sister. She has major attitude with everyone, acts like your the dumbest person in the world when she talk to you, rolls her eyes or will make a fist at you, and nothing keeps her attention. Please help me! I don't want to put her on meds but the road she is on is heading that way.

[krichar]

Hi there! Well... I did experience all of that with my son (who is now 3 weeks shy of 12). We even had to go sit in playschool with him :( we tried EVERYTHING!! He saw a child behavior psychologist from 3.5 years old till almost 6 years old and there was nothing that was working. We then started him on meds ( I said I would only do it if HE was affected, not for my own sanity). We even saw a team of specialists at our child development centre as they thought he may have a form of autism. He was finally diagnosed by a team of experts ( psychologist, behavior therapist, occupational therapist, pediatrician, and sight and hearing tests) with severe ADHD (so bad it shows on the autism spectrum) ODD ( oppositional defiant disorder) and Tourette's. We continue to see specialists regularily through the ADHD clinic and the Tourette's clinic.

As for your decision to medicate... I would only do it if you have tried everything else. A lot of behavior modification tools work well. And I would only do it after a thorough diagnosis by more then one doctor. People are quick to medicate a problem away (especially teachers and doctors) but if nothing else works and your daughter is suffering then I would do it.

He is a COMPLETELY different child on his meds, he is a "normal" boy. Still full of energy and active just not so unbalanced and destructive. He still misbehaves and is in no way a zombie or robot, he is actually more responsive and attentive. I hope I was able to help :)

[LizardLiz]

Hi stef... No she never was in daycare but did go to pre-k half day. I work daylight till 2 so I am home to be with her and her sister. I was married before I had my kids but her dad has not lived with us for the past 6 months. Her behavior has been an issue since she was able to walk/talk. She would slap my mother's glasses off her face while being held and then laugh. Hitting/anger has always been an issue. I have been told she could have a TSS with her at school but I don't want the kids to make fun of her thats why I had thought about putting her on meds.... I just hoped to hear some feed back from some parents who maybe have gone through some of these issues or have kids on meds for ADHD. Thanks :)

[Stef110]

I have 3 kids. My oldest is 6 and she started walking at 9 1/2 months. All of my kids have been larger than kids their age. Anyway, I dont know when your daughters birthday is but mine was born in June 2005. She is in First grade. My middle just turned 5 and she will be in kindergarten in the fall.
I think some of what you said is normal, as far as some of her attitude and eye rolling. My daughter does that but she has never hit anyone and as far as I know she doesn't sneak out of class. I know in kindergarten they had a small bathroom in the class room but in 1st grade it's a short way down the hall.
Was she ever in daycare? It could be possible she picked it up from other kids in pre-k or cousins or daycare if she went there. None of my kids have ever been in daycare just for the fact that I do not know what kind of kids they'd be around. When I moved down where I'm at, before I got pregnant at all, my cousin was having issues with other kids hitting and biting her kids in a few different daycares.
I do spank my kids when I think it is necessary. Just on the butt or on the hand, depending on the incident. We try to use just time out.
My 6 year has actually been growing a lot. She seems to want to be alone more, away from her siblings and doing her own thing. She gets mad a lot, like a TEENAGER, lol! She was going on earlier in the week about how we all annoy her and keep talking and don't leave her alone.
It didn't sound like you mentioned her father? And it sounds like your gone ALL week except fridays? I spend a lot of time with my kids. When I was working my husband and I had our hours worked out so that mainly one of us was with them. I got lucky and was able to quit my job in the middle of 2010 to be a stay at home mom. My pay wasn't that great and after gas went up I really wasn't making that much more after paying for gas to get there and back.
My daughter is in karate and goes every thursday. She is a 1st degree green belt and she likes it. She takes her test in 3 weeks to see if she makes 2nd degree green belt.
Either she picked these things up from someone or she's acting out. And maybe after she started to act out she realized no one was punishing her so she's pushing the limits. It's really hard to say...