This patient support community is for discussions relating to the challenges of parenting children (age 6-12), including physical development, handling school & classes, emotional development, cognitive development, and games and activities.
It's unlikely he is going through hormone changes or puberty at that age. however, it has been known to occur. Although it may be hard to do, ask him if he has noticed any changes to his body, or see if you can somehow check yourself.
Although he may be young, anger and moodiness have been my sons' shout out to me that they've hit puberty. Just between 9 and 10 both of my boys became combative, it didn't matter what, they fought me on everything. I missed the boat with my oldest, but with my youngest, it clicked. We got out our body book and read about puberty. Now he feels confident that he understands his highly emotional reactions. He's proud that he is becoming a man. We have a deal that he eats on a strict schedule, and if he feels tense, he eats something to calm him. It's working so well for us. Sharing experiences is so important, I hope this helps. Let us know how you're doing.
Oh my GOODNESS! I am SO glad I found this forum! I got on the computer tonight to see what I could find on EXACTLY this problem!
My son will be 8 in September and in, say, the last 3 months or so he's gone from being a really sweet, easygoing, loving, affectionate and reasonably communicative little guy to one REALLY moody, brooding, incommunicative little dude! He also seems to be very "fashion" conscious these days, though he's always been a bit more so than most boys. (That's another post in itself.) I'd actually begun to wonder if maybe this was a very early symptom of impending puberty--and I swear his leg hair is growing longer and thicker too, though he denies he's growing hair anywhere else.
Although the first 5 years of his life were very stable and happy, he's gone through a lot in the last year, (his dad was convicted and jailed on drug-related charges, I separated from his dad, we've moved twice due to financial problems and I've returned to college to complete my degree), so there's certainly been enough going on to cause him emotional distress. But it's not until the last 3 months or so that he really seems to be struggling with it now that dad is out of jail and living just down the street from us. And that, in fact, may be part of the whole thing as well since he's now having to deal with his father face-to-face and Daddy isn't doing all that great a job at re-earning the trust and respect of his son. His father and I have a relatively conflict free relationship at this time, I should note, because my ex and I have both worked very hard to keep our relationship "pleasant" for our son's sake. There is no struggle over custody or visitation and father and son can see each other anytime they wish. While I can't change my feelings of anger and betrayal for my ex, I work hard to "play nice" to avoid conflict whenever humanely possible and always out of earshot of our son if a disagreement does arise.
I thought I'd been handling it all very well and so was my son. We've had a really great degree of communication and up until recently, he's been very expressive about his feelings about what was going on in his life and how he felt about it all with just a bit of encouragement by me to keep those lines of communication open. His teacher consistantly reported that he seemed to be handling everything very well and a friend (a psychologist who is a long term family friend) also felt that we were doing very well after hearing several reports on my son's behavior. At last check-in, about 6 months ago, he did not feel a consultation with a child psychologist was indicated.
So now, the dust has pretty much settled--or at least life has become a lot more stable and predictable, and NOW he's showing definate personality changes. Periods of sudden anger, sadness and having a really hard time talking about his feelings at all. I'm seeing much more aggressive play, he's having a hard time getting along with other children --where once he was an absolute social butterfly who never met a child who was a stranger. Today, when he came home with his father, his dad reported that our son had actually gotten in to a fist-fight with his most frequent playmate--and my son was the one to throw the first punch! (Which is ABSOLUTELY forbidden behavior in our home! My son has never been spanked, is not permitted to watch really violent TV or movies, and has never witnessed domestic violence in the home,)
I'm not going to rule out the possibility of consulting with a child psychologist if this doesn't begin to even out a bit in the next month or so, but I can't tell you how relieved I am to hear that this is such a common stage at this age!
Anyway, I'm rambling and I apologize. I'm just really happy to have found a group of parents of kids my son's age!
OMG! Thank you for this post! My son is turning 8 and for the last 8 months or so we have started to think he was bipolar but then he settles down so I never take him in but now he is starting to stink so he has to wear deodorant now, mood swings off the chart (crying one day lashing out the next) and he is very big for his age at least 6" above his class mates and solid as a rock. He has been going through steroid treatments all summer long for chronic asthma and put on a lot of weight that isn't going away. He's not fat just very solid, body shape is changing, little belly fat he never used to have. I will still talk to the dr about this but everyone I talk to tells me it's hormones.
My 8 and 1/2 yr old is digging in his heels with his friends and now arguing and fighting with his 12 yr old sister anytime time things don't go exactly his way. If his friends don't want to play what he wants to play, he goes inside and turns on the tv and says too bad. and he won't give in. If he and my daughter are playing, they could be having the best time and suddenly if she does something he doesn't like, he will explode. He has become totally unreasonable. It is driving me crazy and I'm not dealing with it well. Need some advice.
Thank you....I was in tears this morning. I was asking him what is wrong. He seems so sad and then when he is playing with friends/family he is all smiles and energy. The minute we are in a private setting with our little family he gets sad and depressed over the smallest thing like not have money to pay chips. He swears he is not depressed about anything, no one has offended him, life is good but as a mom I was really considering getting him tested.
This has only been within the last couple of months. We have had no major changes, other than his sister changing schools for a higher grade level. I asked are you sad you sister is not going to school with you anymore, he says yes but I don't that is the primary reason for this weird behavior. Then I thought, my son has always been a BIG boy. He was born 9lbs 6oz. He is now 8 years old and 5ft tall wearing a size 8 man shoe. He is a thin build so I am not saying that is a factor of being overweight because he is the right weight for his height. I am really considering changing his diet.
I feel so relieved that I am not the only one going through these kinds of problems with my 8 year old son...I understand my daughter, she is 12, so the "woman" puberty madness has started but he is such a loving kid and I was really worried.
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