should i tell my 10 year old about his bio father

[khristy1980]

i was seperated at the time from my legal husband due to emtional abuse,
when i met Bio dad i had not had children in 22 years and was told that i couldn't
guess what i did.
It did not work out in the 6 months we were together the last month of our realationship i found that i was
pregant,
I went home    were my husband and i had currently resided              to carry my son until he was born then give him up for adoption      because i did not want him to have
the life i did comeing from a divorced family .
His bio father tried to get soul custody and was denied ,
his bio father also refused to give up rights so that the adoptive parents ( Doctor and Nurse ) could have him the day he was born it took nine days for him to concent at that point there was no way i could give him up.
since the last 10 years his bio father has not called or anything
I took him to met his bio grand mother at the age of 6 ,
My husband was furious I did not go again.
at this point I have now been married to my husband for 29 years he has always been there for my son
Recently I have become unemployed ( now 1 year ) in that year my husband has changed drasticley
( he has a history of emotional abuse with me years long ) He has also threaten to leave this nov. when our 5 year bankrupt is over ,  
at this point i have 2 sons the other is 8 and we were blessed to have him a year and half after my 10 year old
so I guess my question really is , should i tell my 10 year old after I would get a divorce or now ,
and is it wrong for me to persue bio for finacial support .   thanks hope you can understand it all.

[seattlemom2plus]

Wanted to check in with you to see how everything was going with your situation, any updates?

[khristy1980]

Thanks I am sure that he is the father when he was born his bio father tried to get full custody of him.   I appreciate the input thanks

[seattlemom2plus]

I would certainly be honest with your son, not doing so could cause a resentment from him in years to come.  And it would be better to come from you now than a forced situation where you are doing a paternity test, this is if you are actually sure that this person is the father.  My mother told me about my biological father when I was younger, it was only when I was about 30 that I found out it could have also been another man as well.

[AnnieBrooke]

Talk to a lawyer about the financial-support issue.  You may have waived the right to do so by waiting so long, but maybe you do not ever get to waive a child's right to support from his father.

If you pursue financial support, you'll doubtless need to prove paternity, and it seems like a 10-year-old would learn what was going on if you do.