Abandoned Child

[Brandy66]

I recently got married to a beautiful woman who has a 5 year old girl who was abandoned by her father. The father abandoned the mother when she became pregnant and it is now that the biological father is trying to communicate with his biological daughter. My question is what should I do? what should my wife do? and what should we as a family do? What should we tell our daughter? The little 5 year old girl sees me as her father and we have a wonderful relationship. The biological father called and wanted to speak to his biological daughter, however he did not offer any form of financial or emotional support or any alternatives or explanations to my wife. The biological father said that he would keep in contact but said nothing else. He tried communicating with my wife last year in July but failed to keep communication open with her. It is hard to tell what his motives or intentions are. He may not call again for another year or he may call in a month, or we may not hear from him for 5 years, it's hard to tell. We want to protect the little girl and keep her from getting hurt and we are fearful of any emotional scars this could leave. If you could give us some suggestions, maybe point us in the right direction or offer some advice we would greatly appreciate it. Thank you for any help.

[margypops]

This is a tough one , my personal opinion is that all children should know both parents, when they get older they will ask why they havent seen the Bio parent and this can create resentment, I understand your problem , it sounds as if he wants to be part of her life, I think your wife should make sure that he has financial responsibility towards her. Think of the child see it through her eyes, now whilst she is young but also when she is older, she would want to be part of his life. The best scenario for children is to be able to be part of all your lives, they didnt create the problem, its up to the big folks to work it out.So my answer to you is Yes she should have him in her life and he should contribute to her upbringing.Good Luck