Manipulation

My ex wife left shortly after my daughter was born. I raised her mostly by myself until 7 years ago when I remarried a terrific woman. My daughter is now 14. last year my ex came back into the picture with vengance. she came back with in force telling my daughter many things it was my fault she was gone I would not let her. I have all the money she is poor, your dad is just mean. on an on. we are best friends and showered her with gifts and over the top attention from someone who has never given it to her. The next thing I know my daughter has totaly rejected me. She took me back to court for full custody but minors counsel saw right through it and ruled in favor of me. how do I fix my daughters beliefs now? I have her in counseling but My ex is still doing it.

[margypops]

I am sorry this is hard after you have looked after her so well, As you still have full custody there is no battle going on, perhaps you could back off from any talk or listening to remarks from her mother, distance your self from the mother, you say your daughter has rejected you, in what way, did she want to go and live with her mother?what reason does she give, have you had a talk with her, does she reject her stepmon aswell?

[Dodgers]

I have 50% custody with my ex wife, so she has full chance and is still manipulating her. My original divorce papers were 50% but she never took her that way until she turned 13 thats when the problems started. Thats why my daughter was easy to get too by saying your dad prevented me from being involved he has spent time with you its my turn. I parent I make her do homework and I have rules were she does not and she is giving her attention that she has never had. She is 14 with no bedtime no homework no rules at her moms. I could go on but I am sure you get it. She has not really rejected my step mom I have been the target of my ex wifes attacks. Although its killing my wife! She really doesn't give a reason. She just says I don't know her. which is weird because I know her the best! I have tried to talk to her over and over.  

[margypops]

I guess you have to let go on the 50% you dont have her , you can only control what happens on your 50% . To make it less stressful how about you take a step back, let her do the homework and what ever she does with you yet not be involved with what she does with her mom, instead of talking to her about the things you are concerned about, homework,bedtime stuff you have no control over, have some fun with her , games and reading and doing things, the 3 of you, win her over ,focus on her postitive side and praise her when you see her doing something right, it must be hard for her being torn between the two of you....

[worriedbabe]

I wouldn't let it go if someone was doing that to my child, trying to poison a young girl's mind against you is emotional and mental abuse. i don't care for the total lack of discipline your daughter seems to have when with her mother either. I'd log as many instances as i could and share them with my solicitor, who'd advise the next step.