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15 year old son wants to buy a zippo lighter?
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15 year old son wants to buy a zippo lighter?

My 15 year-old sun asked me to buy him a zippo lighter. He says he wants one because they look cool and he wants to do tricks and stuff with it. He is near the top of his class in school and I'm fairly sure he's not smoking cigarettes or pot (if he was able to get that stuff, I don't think he'd need to ask me for a lighter). He's usually responsible but I'm just somewhat uncomfortable with the idea of him having a lighter. I'm also made more uncomfortable by the fact that he says he's an anarchist (I try not to force any kind of religious or political views on him).
Tags: teen, lighter
16 Comments Post a Comment
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134578_tn?1404951303
Do you think there is a connection between Zippo lighters and anarchism?
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134578_tn?1404951303
Here is from a drug-abuse website:
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Many "smoking accessories" manufactured and sold today to kids are covert by design. We have come across "pot" pipes that are made to look like common everyday items, including magic markers, car cigarette lighters, pens, lipstick, cigarettes, Zippo lighters, key chain flashlights, cube toys, and even batteries. When in doubt, examine the suspected item closely. It won't work the same as its legitimate counterpart. Moreover, the odor of marijuana, burn marks and residue will quickly give it away.

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Does he want you to just go to the store and buy him one?  Or does he have a particular one in mind?  

You said that if he was able to get 'things like that,' (i.e., illicit things to smoke), he wouldn't have to ask you for a lighter.   All high schoolers can get things like that, they can tell you what door of the school to walk out of to get drugs.  Don't kid yourself, even middle-schoolers get offered things (often by their friends, who got them out of Mom and Dad's medicine cabinet) at the bus stop.

If he is asking you for a particular lighter and it's kind of fancy in a box, it might well be a pipe, just check it out with him and look it over.  If he just wants 'a lighter,' it's kind of puzzling.  That is why I wondered if you thought there was an anarchy connection, but it would take some odd kind of thinking to ask a parent to buy some kind of device to blow up the Houses of Parliament, like in V for Vendetta.

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13167_tn?1327197724
When my son at that age asked for a zippo lighter,  I wish I'da said fine,  glad to get one for you,  but first pee in this cup and pass a drug test.

Instead,  I went out and bought the zippo lighter,  thinking it was one more funny quirky thing he likes - like calligraphy pens,  archival paper,  and rattlesnake tails.

Word to the wise - if he wants a zippo,  he's smoking pot.
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Avatar_m_tn
I bought a zippo at his age and yes it was for smoking. Cigs not pot. But I think you're in some serious denial if you don't think he is up to no good. Kids don't need lighters for any reason. There is no justification. I know you'll do what you want ultimately but speaking as an adult man I can tell you that there's only less than a handful of reasons why a kid his age would want a lighter, and none of them are good.
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Avatar_f_tn
I used to be top of my class all through high school, my parents called me the good child, but the truth was I was smoking pot all the time, so like the previous comment said I'd ask him to take a pee test because it's not normal for a kid to just ask for a zippo lighter. Being top of the class doesn't really mean anything as far as drugs are concerned
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Avatar_m_tn
I am a 14 year old and own a zippo. No, it is not for smoking. I just enjoy flicking it on and off. I am fairly top of my class with an A- average. My father allowed me to purchase a zippo because he knows that I don't smoke or do drugs, and I never will. If I were you, I would take a good look at my son and really imagine myself in his place. Even if he was doing drugs, your not stopping him by not buying him the lighter. Im sure you have a cheapo lighter for candles lying around your house that he could use. So if you trust him, buy it.
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Avatar_f_tn
I have SO many friends who just love zippos and lighters..just because. Boys have a weird thing for them.

But if his intentions are actually to smoke..I doubt he'd be asking you for a lighter. And if that's what he wants it for, he'll end up stealing it or getting someone else to buy it for him.
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Avatar_f_tn
So, what did  you decide?  Did he get the zippo?  One of my boys began collecting zippos at about that age.  He is still a collector and he isn't a smoker/user.  He is now finishing up a college degree, on the honor roll, blah, blah, blah.  Personally, I don't think collecting an item is synonymous with illicit behavior or a religious statement.  
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Avatar_m_tn
I was 11 when i bought my first Zippo... i saved up all my money to get a Harley Davidson Zippo, it came in a tin box and was beautifull.
after 3 days i told my mom and that night my father took it away from me.
you will get it back when you become 18 he said...

i was so pissed at the time and started collecting Zippo's but secretively i just love that "click" sound genuine Zippo's make.

my parents got devorced and when i turned 18 i got the zippo back.
now that Zippo was in mint condition and 5 times the original value.
I said to myself to keep it and give it to my kids when they are old enough to enjoy it.

If you like Zippo's design or the Zippo "click" you want one no matter how old you are!

I do smoke pot but this started years later when i was 18 and trust me if you want to smoke pot you get a disposable butane lighter because zippo smells too much and it kills the taste of your blunt and pot.

so if you find your son with a lot of disposable lighters he might be smoking pot.

if you give him a Zippo he will always remember you buying him one.


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Avatar_f_tn
I'm 18, I can buy whatever I want to smoke. Problem is, I don't smoke. I do, however, own a couple if zippos. Take it from me, an actual teen;  sometimes what he's saying is the truth. Our logic doesn't make sense to us either. The zippo is iconic and a symbol of American ingenuity, plus it has a cool click sound. Buy it for him, but teach him responsibility.
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Avatar_f_tn
I'm 18, I can buy whatever I want to smoke. Problem is, I don't smoke. I do, however, own a couple if zippos. Take it from me, an actual teen;  sometimes what he's saying is the truth. Our logic doesn't make sense to us either. The zippo is iconic and a symbol of American ingenuity, plus it has a cool click sound. Buy it for him, but teach him responsibility.
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Avatar_f_tn
I'm 18, I can buy whatever I want to smoke. Problem is, I don't smoke. I do, however, own a couple if zippos. Take it from me, an actual teen;  sometimes what he's saying is the truth. Our logic doesn't make sense to us either. The zippo is iconic and a symbol of American ingenuity, plus it has a cool click sound. Buy it for him, but teach him responsibility.
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Avatar_f_tn
I'm 18, I can buy whatever I want to smoke. Problem is, I don't smoke. I do, however, own a couple if zippos. Take it from me, an actual teen;  sometimes what he's saying is the truth. Our logic doesn't make sense to us either. The zippo is iconic and a symbol of American ingenuity, plus it has a cool click sound. Buy it for him, but teach him responsibility.
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Avatar_m_tn
Why don't you just trust him?  He's top of class for christ sake.  15 is not as young as it might sound.  Just tell him how you honestly feel about drugs.  THat you don't condone it and WHY you feel the way you.  Then, mention your personal experience.  Do it.  Be honest with your child.  If you tried weed when you were younger, but didn't like it or stopped, tell him why you stopped.    Don't just throw down arbitrary rules - he's a few years away from being an adult and having the ability to legally emancipate himself as well as flurry of other rights.  He's not a child anymore.  No amount of parenting no matter how well researched will allow you to make choices for your kid. At this point most of your parenting is done and and the growth he makes will be based on his choices alone.  The harder you try to make a 15 year old fit your wishes the harder they will rebel.  So, tell him why drugs are bad - from your own experience - not what the law, or the schools, or other BS institutions say - but why YOU believe it's wrong.  Then, let him make up his own mind.  I know it's scary but you're in denial if you think there's another option.  Buy him a lighter, teach him how to use it safely, trust him even when you're scared for his wellbeing and the chances of the kid turning into a well-developed, well-rounded, adult who makes good choices based on his OWN properly developed moral compass will be astronomically higher than if you attempted to formulate his behaviour some other way. After all, isn't that what a successful parent does?  Raises them as best they can, teaches them what the know, and then let's them go - let's them be who they are going to be.  You can be an amazing parent with a ****** kid through no fault of your own.  You can be a **** parent with naturally good kids.  A 15 year old will become who ever he was meant to become, you are only his guide along the way.  Trust me when I say buying him a zippo will either make a negligible difference or a positive one.  If anything negative comes out of it, he would have done so anyway - postponing him owning a zippo for a few years won't change his views on anarchy, or anything else for that matter.  However, telling him you trust him, giving him something potentially dangerous and teaching him how to use it properly, and then watching him become a responsible self-sufficient human being is one of the greatest things you can do for your child.
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Avatar_m_tn
You cannot smoke marijuana with a zippo lighter... this is general knowledge amongst kids.
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Avatar_m_tn
I don't know if this has been said yet (or if it's still relevant) but, a zippo doesn't come ready to use out of the box.  You have to also buy lighter fluid to fuel the lighter, without it the lighter will just spark and produce no flame.  I would say you should get him the zippo, but if you really don't trust him don't get him lighter fluid as well.
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