4 year old will only poop in diaper

My son is potty trained, except for the fact that he will only poop at night when we put him to bed in a diaper.  If he has to go during the day, he'll hold it until bedtime and poop in his diaper.  We've tried going cold turkey and completely doing away with diapers at night, but then he just poops his pants and we end up with loads and loads of laundry.  We have tried all different types of rewards and things to get him to poop on the potty, but he absolutely refuses.  I know that everyone says to avoid punishing, but it just really feels naughty when he has complete control over his bowels and is choosing not to poop in the potty.  Please help!

[PaperMoon3]

That seems to be pretty common in  kids that age, he will eventually grow out of it, some kids will be potty trained then revert for a while around that age before outgrowing it completely.  My niece was the opposite, she would only poop on the toilet but still needed diapers or pull ups at 4yrs old. She outgrew it though. :)  

[miscdesign]

I didn't have to go thru this but a friend of mine did... her 4yr old son did the same thing, was potty trained, exept when it came to pooping... he did grow out of it as well : )

[tighe]

We had a similar situation with a 5 year old boy.

Friends of ours had to go out of town overnight to a funeral.

They asked if my wife and I could watch their 5 year old boy and we happily agreed.

When it came time for bed I noticed my wife diapering him in our guest room and thought it odd for a 5 year old to still need diapers. However I just assumed it was for bedwetting issues and dismissed it.

The next morning when I went in to check on him I opened the door and was nearly knocked over by the smell. Apparently he had a bowel movement in his diapers overnight. I shut the door and told my wife who already knew he was not potty trained.

It boggled my mind why he was not yet at the very least potty trained for poop at 5 years old.

I very delicately brought it up with his father (my best friend) who told me they were not pushing him on this issue and eventually he would be trained in his own timeframe.

I said nothing more about it. Our children were potty trained day and night before they were 3 years old with an occasional night time wetting accident.

I can't believe that some people would let an older child continue to poop in a diaper past the age 3 let alone 5 years old.

As I researched the topic I was surprised and shocked to see there are many children refusing to poop on the potty.

The best thing to do and we did this with our children is the reward system or bribe if you want to call it that.

What we did was we kept a basket with small little cheap toys and we we had a succesful potty visit they would get to choose a toy from the basket.

For us this was a real motivator for them. We also made a big deal over it.

Secondl, Whenever I had to poop I would take our son in with me to show him there was nothing to be afraid of by pooping on the potty.

My son and I made a pact, whenever he had to go I would go with him and whenever I had to go he would go with me.

As for our daughter, my wife and my daughter had a similar arrangement. For us it really worked.

It is upsetting and disturbing to change dirty diapers on a 5 year old who shows no shame or embarrassment.

When my brother and I were toddlers my mother used the shame method which back in those days was acceptable. While I do not believe in this method you would think that at 5 years old a child would show some sort of shame or embarrassment at having his dirty diapers changed by someone else besides his parents.

[sgf1]

I have a 4.4 year old boy who is similar to your son.  He pees on the potty with no problems but will not poop.   He never has accidents either.   He brings me a diaper when he needs to go.  But no kind of reward works on him.   He just won't go on the potty.  I have tried for over a year now and nothing is working.  I too don't know what to do.  

[sgf1]

I finally got my son to go poop on the potty.  If you still need help let me know and i can share what worked for me.

[amrapali]

please help me also regarding this issue.. send some tips.. i am having the same issue with my 2.5 yrs old daughter  she was pee pee trained at the age of 26 months but for  poo poo..  i am still struggling... so please guide me what to do..?

[sgf1]

What methods have you tried on her?  rewards, stickers, praise?

[kstene]

Yeagh we have this problem maybey you can answer my question on yahoo "It's more then bad it for mostly 4 year olds. My little brother weighs around 42 and up and he really has messy diapers... its overflowing and its a mess! We have him on size 7 diapers Pampers and wonder is that good enough or is ther other help we can get. also what wipes should we buy. can anyone give me steps on doing this im 14 and need help bad. His diapers are not normal their BAD. Thanks"  Please help me its really bad and it stinks what should I do

[pinky786]

try mineral oil or ped lax, so he would have to go poop before night time.  or just wait it out, they all grow out it.
hope it helps