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Caught having sexual intercourse with daddy by 5 year old daughter
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Caught having sexual intercourse with daddy by 5 year old daughter

Hey Guys!! I am freshly new to this site, I joined because I am having an issue with my daughter. A week ago her father and I were having sexual intercourse down in our rec room. It was 10:30pm and the last I had checked she was fast asleep. Our home is more like a bungalow/high ranch.... while I was on top of her father ( both of us bottoms off) I heard " Stop It, Stop it Now" quickly jumped off of my husband and realized that it was our daughter yelling because of what she saw. I spoke to her about it, she knows it's called sex and that Mommy and Daddy do this because we love each other.
My concern is she uses it against me now, she brings it up at shool with her teacher and with some of her friends at Day Care... She says she cant get it out of her head and that Mommy and Daddy should only do this when they have a sleep over at Auntie and Uncles house. She is upset it woke her up ( she was woken up by the loud movie we had on, not any sexual noises) Every time she brings it up-we speak to her ALONE and explain what it is and that we are sorry she saw it.  How do I get her to not speak about it and to not be so upset? Also, hold it against me. She explains to me that she didnt sleep well because she had a bad sleep and heard mommy and daddy and thats why she is so grumpy. This happened a week ago..

Any advice is better then no advice.
Much appreciated.

Ashley
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1530171_tn?1362547225
Hi!
And welcome to the forum!
She might hold some unconscious feeling and desire to possess her dad- the parent of the opposite sex -Oedipous Complex -, so don't be surprised with her reaction so far.
And it is the  age that this manifests usually.

On the positive side, this event will teach her the meaning of disappointment at a little deeper level, so let her "venting" get expressed. This an important mechanism in our psyche, that  should  be allowed to complete its function.
Meanwhile you must accept to live with the potential embarassment for a few more days.

It would be advisable to accept what happened at face value.
It's not the first time this has happened in a couple's life.
Your explanation about this incident to her was the truth and it came from your heart.
Start paying less attention and before you know it, it will be all behind you.
Perhaps  planning some fun and  exciting -for your girl- activities involving all of you, might help bring things back to normal sooner.
Take care and Blessings to you and your family.
Nikodicreta

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9 Comments Post a Comment
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1530171_tn?1362547225
Hi!
And welcome to the forum!
She might hold some unconscious feeling and desire to possess her dad- the parent of the opposite sex -Oedipous Complex -, so don't be surprised with her reaction so far.
And it is the  age that this manifests usually.

On the positive side, this event will teach her the meaning of disappointment at a little deeper level, so let her "venting" get expressed. This an important mechanism in our psyche, that  should  be allowed to complete its function.
Meanwhile you must accept to live with the potential embarassment for a few more days.

It would be advisable to accept what happened at face value.
It's not the first time this has happened in a couple's life.
Your explanation about this incident to her was the truth and it came from your heart.
Start paying less attention and before you know it, it will be all behind you.
Perhaps  planning some fun and  exciting -for your girl- activities involving all of you, might help bring things back to normal sooner.
Take care and Blessings to you and your family.
Nikodicreta

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535822_tn?1389452880
time to let the subject go the more that is made of it the more it is becoming, you have spoken to her about it, may be a good idea not to rehash it..Not a good idea to have loud movies on when children are sleeping .
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13167_tn?1327197724
I think a lot of kids walk in on their parents,  it's not that uncommon (although I'm sure you've learned that the rec room isn't the best place for this!) but her reaction is unusual.  

Most kids who see this either are embarrassed,  or if they don't know what sex is,   they are afraid their parents are hurting each other.  

In general,  does this fit her personality?  In general,  does she sort of always see herself as the focus of attention,  in get unusually upset and punitive when things don't go her way,  or does she hold grudges a long time and try to embarrass and humiliate people who have accidentally wronged her?    If that's the case,  I'd treat this incident as one more thing that she handles gracelessly and treat it matter of factly as if you'd accidentally broken something of hers or someone bumped into her and knocked her over.

If this is very unusual for her and she usually acts sweetly and rolls with the punches,  there is more to be concerned about here.  

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1512839_tn?1300245802
She's jealous of you. Especially over something that she doesn't quite understand and probably looks frightening. She processed those feelings with anger.

Tell dad to start paying a lot more attention to her and don't bring it up again even if she does until it goes out of her head. My guess this is going to be a while.

Change the subject with a "that's a mom and dad subject, and it's over with now. Let's talk about something different, shall we?

Hard lesson learned, mom. We all have them.
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1512839_tn?1300245802
Thinking on what I wrote......I need to add that when I say that she's jealous of you, I don't mean in some sexual way. I think Freud is a pervert and all his Oedipus complex CRAP, is exactly that...ravings from a perverted mind based on myths.

She doesn't understand sex of course at her age, she just wants that extra special attention, too, that you are getting. So that's what she needs now, from daddy. :)
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1134902_tn?1296069744
It's never too young to have sex talks with your children.  She may sense your uneasiness when it's brought up, and sees it as a tool to her advantage.  Use the proper terminology and make it matter of factly, to help her understand.   Let her know that it's a private matter and should only be discussed with mommy and daddy.
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