I'm mom to 2 boys: a 3.5 year old and a 10 week old. Our oldest naps at daycare but dropped his nap when he's at home on the weekends. Now that we have a baby, we're getting back into the napping again....and even though he's still fairly small, he's already settled into a routine - he usually goes down for a 2 hour or so morning nap between 9:30 and 10am and goes down for another nap (also about 2 hours) in the afternoon between 2:30 and 3pm.
On the weekends routine is disturbed by other things that are going on...and while DS no. 2 is a very easgoing, happy-go-lucky baby, I've noticed that he is just SO TIRED by the end of the day on the weekends, cries a lot and is hard to console. He's become so good at sleeping in his own bed that he's not napping much in his carseat when we're on the go....
The first time around, we ended up having to work around our son's naps (ie. we'd wait until he'd wake up from a nap to go out and run errands; otherwise, being out with a tired baby wasn't enjoyable). I guess we've already gotten to that point this time around.
Are we catering too much to our kids? I mean, I have a friend who runs all over town with her little guy (he's 3 weeks younger than my youngest....so almost 7 weeks) and he sleeps away in his carseat no problem. We don't stop our lives or activities, we just modify the timing. I'm a firm believer that adequate rest is crucial to a little one's development....and overtired kids actually seem to sleep more fitfully at night, so I don't think we're doing them - or ourselves - any favours by denying them their rest throughout the day.....
I don't think your catering to your kids by staying home at nap time. it's pretty easy to plan things around that time that they have there naps, but then again you don't want to stop your life. so it goes either way. Just be flexible first and then if it's something that can't be pushed to a different time or day then go ahead and do it. Maybe he'll get used to it and fall asleep in his carseat. You probaby haven't had him in his carseat much that he doesn't sleep in it yet, but the more he's out and about i'm sure he'll learn to adjust.
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