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How do I Help My Sons
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How do I Help My Sons

My Husband walked in and caught my 10yr old son in bed with his 5 yr old brother with there bottoms off touching each other my husband was completely upset and I was totally shocked and didn't know what to do or how to respond after the situation calmed down my husband and I sat down with our 10 yr old first and explained to him that is not ok to touch or be touched in that area by any one in that way and we also asked the obvious questions of where did he get the idea to do this and so on after some tears and more talking with the 10 yr old we talked with our 5 yr old son and asked him what happened and made sure he knew that what happened was not ok as well and we told them that they are not to be off playing together alone for a while just to be sure that the incident would not happen again.Several months have past and things were looking great when suddenly i was awaken again to the sound of my hubby upset because my 10 yr old was still touching his 5yr old brother and now my 5yr old is saying that the 10yr old is also touching the 4yr old brother at this point I really don't know what to do my 10 yr old denies that he was touching his brother again and says that he never touched my 4yr old son its not the easiest thing to ask a 4yr old so i have no idea if what he says is true or not,I love them with all my soul and I never would have thought in a million years that this would be happening to my kids by my kids or anyone so please help me figure out how to help my sons..
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4 Comments Post a Comment
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1006035_tn?1391310794
Well, I gotta say that it is normal for kids to start exploring their bodies at a very young age. It is also normal for them to start exploring each other's bodies. While I agree that they need to stop touching each other, I don't think your approach is working very well. When you tell a child not to do something and freak out over it, you just make them want to do it more. You even barred them from playing alone. It just makes them think this is something they really want to do because you are constantly reminding them about it. Relax a little and at least try to pretend like you don't think it's a big deal. Just from your post I can tell that you are really upset.
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Avatar_m_tn
A child psychologist is an option.  They are trained to handle matters like this.  My family is no stranger to this issue.  The psychologist will know which approach is best and can ask the right questions.  You will have a better chance at keeping your children's dignity and self-esteem intact.  My family tried to do it their own way first and caused problems.
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Avatar_f_tn
I wouldn't worry too much about it. I'm happily straight, functional guy now, but I admit I was a little kid, I did some weird sexual kind of things. I didn't understand things I was doing as sexual all we ever knew was that it felt good and we were curious about it. we never wanted or intended to hurt each other. talk with your kid and let him know how you feel about the situation, find out how they feel about it and be open. but don't make it seem like what they're doing makes them bad because I'll be honest is going to be very very difficult for them to stop doing it. part of the problems we have a situation like this is we don't let our children explore and become comfortable with their bodies. believe it or not nudist families have a lot less problems with situations like these. not saying people should all start becoming nudists but there must be something right about part of what their doing.
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8590589_tn?1398853074
I agree with @futureciv
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