OCD, Speration Anxiety or is it just learning to Adjust

[Tara1017]

My 4 year old son is having a very hard time adjusting to his new class. I am not sure if its just seperation anxiety, OCD or just learning to Adjust. He puts up a fight every morning to go to school. He will cry so much that you can not even dress him. The only time he seems to calm down is if you constantly keep reassuring him. He will asks qusetions over and over again. I spoke with the teacher and wanted to see if there was anything different in her schedule since he has not even acted this way in his first year of class (this his is 2nd year) and she basically said there wasn;t. She mentioned to me that he has the signs of OCD. Now, if constantly look for reassurance in her class by asking questions over and over and over agin is OCD and there are really no other symptons, then I need to do more research on OCD. I also believe this teacher is not the friendly type of person and that is why my son is having a hard time in her class. The teacher also mentioned that he is constantly asking about his loved ones. I work and my parents take my son to school, but he seem to constantly ask my mother when me and daddy are coming home. I am so confused. I am not sure what to think or what to believe. The funny thing is, is when he leaves school...he says he loves it and he loves the teacher. I have to say the teacher is business and she doesnt' baby them. The teacher says he is making progress and that he really only puts on this act in the morning, but this is such a tough time, especially for my parents. They fear the days he goes to school because of this. Should I be worried? Is it the teacher? or is it because he only goes to school 2.5 days out of the week? Is it seperatio anxiety? I hope you can keep up with all my qusetions. I am just so confused. Am I worrying too much? Thanks for your help. I would appreciate anything you have to offer. Thanks again!

[jdtm]

You probably are seeing signs of anxiety but I wonder if you are dealing with GAD - generalized anxiety rather than OCD or separation (although separation could be a part of this issue).  I might suggest that you google the term "childhood anxiety" or "anxiety in children" or "generalized anxiety" or similar phrases to see if any of these descriptions are similar to those of your son.

Children who have anxiety issues are also much slower in adjusting to new people and environments - but you have already noticed this (it is sometimes referred to the "hesitant factor").  According to the teacher, it appears that your son is starting to make progress and that is good news.  And, most children who suffer from anxiety actually like school, their peers and their teachers, so your son's comments are quite expected.  If anxiety is the issue, then continue doing what you are doing - reassuring him and always keep your word when you promise something.  Stewing and fussing around a child with anxiety only make things worse so try to remain calm and relaxed - something your parents should also try to practise.  The best way to handle mild anxiety is simply to "face one's fears", and that is what your son is doing each day when he goes to school.  After time, the "fears" will be become less and less and so the anxiety should also retreat somewhat.

If his anxiety does begin to escalate, then you will need to see your son's pediatrician or the family doctor for advice re this issue.  But, at this point in time, I feel that route is not necessary.  I wish you the best ....