Parenting Toddlers (1-5) Community
Should I belive my kids??
About This Community:

This patient support community is for discussions relating to the challenges of parenting toddlers (age 1-5), including physical, speech, sensory, cognitive and emotional development, choosing a daycare/nanny, games & activities, and toilet training.

Font Size:
A
A
A
Background:
Blank
Blank
Blank
Blank Blank

Should I belive my kids??

So one weekend when my brother was home with his girl she is 4 my girls are 5 and 7. The girls were playing a game called boy friend girl friend and the 4yr old and the 5yr old were cought kissing by the older one who came and told me and the other parents we told them its not right for them to play it and little girls don't kiss each other. Then the other day I get a call from my brother saying that there girl said that my to girls told her to take her clothes off and they touched her bum. Now I asked my girls one on one about it they both  said that never happened should I belive them?? They have never done anything to make me not belive them. This is the very first I have herd of them doing something like that. So now when I told my brother that they said that there girl was lying and that I belive them it's kinda started a family fude here between us. What should I do?
377493_tn?1356505749
It's so hard to say what really happened.  It's not so much that any of the little one's lied, but they certainly may have seen the situation differently.  Children will answer questions depending on what they think their parents want to hear, and also to avoid getting into trouble. For example, if the question is asked in a very calm matter of fact voice, you may get a different response then the same question being asked in an accusatory or angry tone.  So perhaps the 4 year old said something innocent, dad questioned her further, and she answered differently thinking that that was what dad wanted to hear?  Or perhaps your girls thought that by telling you the truth they might be in trouble?  None of it makes them bad kids, or liars, just normal kids doing what kids do.

For the 4 and 5 year old, taking clothes off and even touching someones bum isn't a huge big deal, at least I don't think so.  The 7 year old would be a bit more concerning as she is old enough to know better.

It does sound like something happened, but whether or not it was just innocent healthy curiousity, or something more is hard to say obviously.  Is it possible that something has happened to any of these kids?  Exposed to something they shouldn't have been from an adult?  Or that anyone has touched them?  This includes the 4 year old who made this claim. Maybe someone else did something, and she is just saying your girls did it?

Fighting with your brother won't really help.  Is there any way the two of you could have an adult conversation about it?
Blank
Post a Comment
To
Blank
Weight Tracker
Weight Tracker
Start Tracking Now
Parenting Toddlers (1-5) Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
How to Silence Your Inner Critic an...
Apr 16 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
242532_tn?1269553979
Blank
Emotional Eaters: How to Silence Yo...
Mar 26 by Roger Gould, M.D.Blank
1344197_tn?1392822771
Blank
Vaginal vs. Laparoscopic Hysterecto...
Feb 19 by J. Kyle Mathews, MD, DVMBlank