self play and toys

[rosebedford]

Just wondering if my kids are the only ones that don't self-play well.  I have two boys, 3 and 4 1/2 and they have never played well by themselves.  I used to think it was because I never bought the right toys, or not enough toys (money is tight).  Wondering how other kids are playing.  My girlfriend told me she spends $100 per kid at X-mas.  I felt so guilty after hearing that and wonder if that's part of the problem.  I only spend $70 at most.  Am I not buying the right toys or enough of them or is this a problem for other mothers?
Nickie

[miscdesign]

I don't think your problem is abnormal.  I know of a lot of parents who say their kids don't play well by themselves.  I don't think it has anything to do with how many or what type of toys either.  I'm able to buy my sons many things, but I'm always amazed that they play more with the most basic of toys / activities.  They really do like playing with a huge box rather than a lot of other expensive toys.  So I wouldn't worry about that, just keep encouraging them to play on their own and they may eventually just start to do it on their own.  (I still have to tell my boys to have "room" time - no t.v. or video games - they are 7 and 5).  

[amyvr]

First of all, I don't think the money spent makes a difference to your children. They don't know the value of a toy in terms of dollars and cents. They only know how it makes them feel. I didn't come from a very rich family and we used our imaginations...climbed trees, played with balls, etc. The basics are what kept us busy.

I have only 1 child (a 2 yr old) He WILL NOT play alone. It's amazing if he enters his room for more than 5 minutes without us being there with him. When he does, he gets a toy and brings it out of there to play with it while in the company of me and my husband. I too wish he would play a little more independently, but I'm not losing sleep over it. Christmas just passed and we traveled to our home town where he was showered with gifts from every family member. Do you know what he liked the most? A $24.99 basketball hoop that we bought him. We had an entire SUV full to the roof with toys and he wants that one toy more than anything. His Christmas would have been complete with just that one toy. It's not the money spent, but the choice you make in spending your money. You know your children, try to find things that they will both enjoy. You can get double the joy from it.  

[crzychick]

Children learn by watching.  They want to be around Mom and Dad to see what is going on.  (all too soon they will be teens and  think you have the plague and will have nothing to do with you)

Plus it's not fun to play alone.  At an early age they have play groups, in school they have recess.      We teach them to share,  you can't play catch by yourself.  It's natural to want to be around others.

  The price or volume of toys don't matter.  I remember that a large box could be a fort, a car or even a puppet stage.      

Enjoy them,  I know it's hard to get things done when they are under foot, try to get them involved.  Little helpers.