Don't want this pregnancy

[lonely22]

My husband just deployed and a week later I found out that I was pregnant, he was very happy and excited I'm not.  We have a 3 yo and I love him with all my heart, I can't do this deployment and take care of a kiddo and be pregnant all at once.  I'm all alone and have no support system, I've been crying for two weeks, having constant panic attacks and not eating.  I've dropped 10 lbs and keep praying I'll miscarry, I'm miserable, scared and lonely and just want my life back not to mention my son needs his life back.  I don't know what to do, if I elect to abort then I'll have to face my husband when he gets back and I don't think I can let him down like that.  I'm out of options and need some advice, please help!!!

[cminamyer]

If you are on a base they have many support systems in place to help you through this.  You have a lot of time to prepare before you baby comes so try and think of it that way it's not going to happen over night.  If you have just found out your pregnant then you husbands deployment my even be over or almost over by the time you actually have the baby.  You are not the only who has ever gone through this or I'm sure is going through this right now so reach out to other moms who are in your situation or maybe you can try to go home during the deployment and get support from your family.

[sheri641]

Most people won't like this but my first pregnancy was awful. I was so sick and prayed id lose the baby. Although I hated myself for it ...I ended up losing the baby at 16 weeks. I was devastated but I truly feel that it wasnt the right time for me and God helped me through it. It still is very sad. I'm currently 15 weeks and so happy and healthy! No matter what its your choice but the worst thing you can do is have any regrets.

[dingus55]

I know it seems impossible now but you will get through it. It's. A decision that you and your husband must make on your own. Deployments alone are difficult let alone adding kids to the mix trust me I'm on my third pregnancy and my husband and I have been through deployment injuries 6 months in a hospital and 2 years of continuing therapy. Trust me I know it seems awful and horrible but you will be amazed at how much stronger you will become!  I hope thic helps!

[trying43]

Im sorry you are dealing with this.  You may want to check in your area for a military wives support group.  Also most pastors at local churches are certified councilors and are free to talk to.  And you may want to see your ob and discuss what u r dealing with.  You r at higher risk for ppd if you are already feeling this way.  I hope you will reach out and get the support you need.  And there is always someone here to talk to!  Good luck to u.

[lindisima828]

I know how you feel. My husband is getting deployed right after this baby is born and i will have 4 kids under 2yrs. I'm exausted all the time and have no idea how i will handle it. Just remember u are stronger than you think! Keep your head up and if u ever need to talk just message me. :-)

[greatexpectations_4_2012]

I know things seem so hard but God is with you. As the last poster said, all things happen for a reason. I think all women get scared when pregnant. It is natural. I think, when you get a chance because I know it is rough, you need to discuss your fears with your husband. He may not be there physically but mentally he is.

I am not trying to judge here, but you broke my heart when you said you hoped you miscarried. I hope things turn around for you and those thoughts go away. I will be praying things get better for you.

[RippedonScotch]

I understand your thoughts.  I wasn't sure I wanted to get pregnant when my husband and I started trying either.   Then I had a miscarriage and I realized how much I actually did want it.  I think we only get thrown things in life that we can handle.

I think the best thing is to talk to those around you.  I think you may find that you have more of a support system around you then you thought you did.   In the end no one can make the decision for you but you.  I know it's not an easy one but I hope you get some comfort in knowing that this site is here to support you too.

    

[Heatherm4]

My heart goes out to you. I think a lot of us go through the thought of not actually wanting to be pregnant. I'll be honest- I've thought of it and I feel terrible for thinking it. I swear to you, I thought of it just this morning! But I do have a great support system and can't imagine how I'd feel without one. I'm just being selfish in my wants and needs and how exhausted I'll be with 2 kids under 2.
I can see your turmoil. You don't have family close? Maybe some of the other moms that are in the same situation as you can give advice! There are plenty of them on here.
I hope things will get better for you. Everything happens for a reason.