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372598 tn?1256940170

I want to strangle my Fiance (kinda OT)....

So, I am not sure if I'm being overtly sensitive in my pregnant state or what, but right now I wanna strangle my fiance and throw him out of the house!!  A friend of mine is engaged to a friend of his, and we go out to lunch a lot.  One time when her and I went out alone to lunch she told me that her fiance called my baby a ******* - I told my fiance and to this day they both still laugh about it.  Today after my ob appointment we are supposed to have lunch with them again and I'm not really wanting to see her fiance today because he has yet to say sorry to me.  Yesterday when I learned that my fiance made these plans I started crying, and my fiance didn't care, didn't say anything.  I made a comment about it today and my fiance laughed again about it.  I took a shower to get away from him and cried my whole shower.  Am I serioulsy being overtly sensitive or not?!

Annie
11 Responses
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Avatar universal
That is your INNOCENT child and you have every right to want to defend them.

Someone got into a fight with my DH when I was pregnant with my firstborn and told him, "I hope your baby is born retarded!" Our baby had NOTHING to do with the argument and to this day he still brags about what he said to my husband to other people.

You should sit down with your fiance and talk to him about this. I don't think it's enough to write him off, but explain to him that you don't call babies names. It's just NOT right!
Helpful - 0
284738 tn?1283106819
I would have been mad too .. i don't care if he was just joking around or not.. i would just call him on it and show him how much class he really has ( or the lack there of)
Helpful - 0
703841 tn?1322565968
to be honest I would have reacted the same way. your friends fiance had no right ro call your baby that and your hubby to be should be backing you up on that. Guys are stupid in all honesty I'd make it clear its not acceptable.
I don't know why it is but people feel they have to put their two cents in for little things all the time. when My husband and I told his family we were pregnant they all rolled their eyes at us and wouldn't even say congratulations to us. so no matter where you go people are going to be dumb. and this child is soo lucky  to have you as a mom I can already tell you love this little one sooo much.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I dont think your being overly sensitive either, you have every right to be pissed I know I would be and it sure doesnt help when all you BF does is laugh about it.
But then again he is a guy and guys dont use their brain a good majority of the time and it especially seems so when you body is raging with hormones.
I would sit down and talk with your BF and let him know that what his friend said really hurt you and you might just be being sensitive because your pregnant but regardless it hurt your feelings and when he laughs about it it makes you feel as though he  doesnt care about how you feel or anything...Play the guilt card a little bit lol...

AJH84---What a B**** I would not be able to stand your co-worker Im surprised you controled yourself as it sounds like you did I swear I would snap.

Keep holding it together and being strong ladies!
Helpful - 0
372598 tn?1256940170
Thanks guys - I am not talking to him and he hasn't even picked up on it - this was supposed to be a good day - a happy day, and now I just feel sad and like no one cares about my feelings.  
Helpful - 0
768015 tn?1333652075
Oh I see. Thats even worse! I am not married myself and though no one has called my baby a B*stard (atleast not to my face), I would be very upset. Your fiance should def support you and I wouldn't want to go to lunch with them either.
Helpful - 0
210400 tn?1325380570
I would be upset too, I think that he should feel angry that someone called HIS baby that. I'm sorry sweetie!
Helpful - 0
568051 tn?1373858363
I would be upset either way pregnant or not.. But the crying so much is due most likely to your pregnancy. I would let it go but if it happens again.. Make your feelings clear.. and tell your fiance that.. just cause he doesnt think its a big deal.... he should atleast care that you do and support you on it!
Helpful - 0
184674 tn?1360860493
I don't think you're being overly sensitive. I would be hurt if my b/f laughed over such a matter about our pregnancy. B@stard is meant as a deragatory term in this day and age, it's not just a term like "illegitamite,"  or something along those lines.
I know how you feel because I have a 4½ year old son with whom I became pregnant by my high school b/f when I was 19, and our relationship fell apart. He is not involved much in our lives and lives 1500 miles away from us. Anyway, I have this co-worker who, at times, pushes me way over my limit to tolerate her "teasing" about my past, and picking on my son as well because he's none the wiser to it (I bring him to work with me a lot). A few months ago, while he was sitting next to me at my desk, she stood at my office door and, right in front of my son AND my manager, asked me when me and my b@stard kid were going home for the day. My manager was so shocked, he didn't know what to say and he just walked away, which upset me quite a bit. Then she kept saying how she was only joking and hoped I wasn't mad at her, and she was laughing about it. I just gave her a look of death and refused to speak to acknowledge her after that.
Now, since finding out about this pregnancy, she's *always* giving me a hard time about having another baby "out of wedlock." I never intended to tell her I was pregnant this early, but she pretty much figured it out and then pried it out of me on her assumption. Just yesterday she said to me something along the lines, "So how does it feel to now to have two kids with two babydaddies?"
I wanted to slug her.
Fortunately, I have a really supportive b/f and he would never stand for any of that from anyone, no matter that our circumstances are "out of wedlock." I coulnd't be more grateful. And gosh, my ex, even though he's a deadbeat jerk and a total good-for-nothing, wouldn't even tolerate such things being said about his son. A few years ago he even told me that he gets so pissed at people who refer to me as his son's babymama and always tells them not to call me that, because I am his *son's mother.*
So I completely understand how hurt and angry you must feel that your fiance isn't supporting you about how you feel, much less about his own child.
Helpful - 0
372598 tn?1256940170
Actually he didn't call my baby an as*h*le - he called my baby a  b a s t a r d
Helpful - 0
768015 tn?1333652075
I am really sensitive and extremely emotional being 23 weeks preggo. I cry about everything and get upset alot. I really have no patience with my BF right now and he tells me I'm crazy and all I do is cry. its actually pretty embarrasing the stupid things I cry over. so I feel your pain. What I don't understand is why that man would call any baby as*h*le let alone yours? So yes I understand why your upset I would be mad to. I don't think thats very funny. Your fiance should be mad too.  
Helpful - 0
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