OMG SO STRESSED!!!

[Kelly87]

So I dont have insurance because I am not working and my fiancee just got laid off about 5 weeks ago and he hasnt been able to find work. Well me and my son are in Florida until my fiancee finds a job in california and we are able to live out there again. So I called to get food stamps and medicaid for me and my son and they asked where the father was. I said that he is living back and forth between florida and cali until he finds a job because he is looking for jobs in both places and the lady asked if he supports his son and I said yes of course... he sends me money for formula and diapers and stuff when hes away and when he is here he buys it. She said that since he doesnt live with us full time I have to go and collect child support from him. I am not doing that. We are engaged about to be married he supports his family WHY THE H E L L DO I HAVE TO COLLECT CHILD SUPPORT?? She said that if I dont then I wont have insurance or food stamps only my son will. I said that is fine... I just want my son to get insurance... So now what do I do?? I dont have insurance... I cant get insurance from the state... and I dont have money to pay out of pocket! I am screwed!! I had pre eclampsia with my son and boarderline gest diabetes so I need to get care!

BTW: I am almost 16w

[blueeyedtabbycat]

I live in Minnesota and I had the same problem getting assistance from the state when me and my hubby took a break almost 7 years ago. They refused to help me unless I applied for child support. I never went through with it cause he was already helping out I didnt need to make it manditory. Heck he would of lost his DL if he missed a payment than I wouldnt get nothin' Besides we worked out our problems so...........Either way I was pissed that they would attempt to force the issue. Medical for ANY single  pregnant woman (not married)in the state of Minnesota is a diffrent story. They will give you medical no matter what and cover the baby through the first year, If your not married even if you do tell them who the father is. Worst come to worse you could always go to a county hospital they wont turn anyone away. Good luck I really hope everything works out for you:)

[sakers1985]

Right Now I cant work and my hubby is working his butt off just to pay bills and I didnt have insurance either so we went to Social Service and told them both of us isnt working I got on medicaid immediatly. They said when he found a job to let them know but I am not going to because I need the coverage. Sometimes we all have to cheat the system to get something that we need. I am now also on WIC because of being on Medicaid. And since you are not working and he isnt your hubby.. I would play the IDK the baby daddy.

[honey1982]

and if worst comes to worst you can always go to the board of health and they will treat you for free or a sliding fee scale which is like maybe $15.00 per visit. or go to your local county hospital. there are programs out. try catholic charities. you just have to do a little research. ask the same women for public aid where are the free clinic or any programs. apply for wic. hope you can get some assistance.

[KM604]

I live in FL and help some of my clients apply for Food Stamps and Medicaid through DCFS.  I don't work for them, so I can't tell you exactly how things work.  But I do know that this is how it is for every women, if you don't count your babies daddy as part of your household then they will say he needs to be put on child support.  So you either can put him down if he doesn't) and not put him down as needed the benefits, or you put him on child support.  They should at least be able to help you with the Pregnancy only Medicaid (first few months then last month, basically delivery, are covered).  Cheating the system is a risk, some people get away with it and others get caught.

[justice6920]

Oh hunny.... I know exactly what your going through.... it is the EXACT same in the state of AZ.... they MAKE you go and set up a case for Child support.... if you dont, you get NO benefits... I know its horrible to cheat the system but my sister ended up telling them that she DID NOT KNOW who the father was..... of course they still set up a case but cant look for someone they dont know...... I know I would NOT want to put child support out on my Fiance when he is doing everything he can and when he does really help you out.....BUT honey if your pregnant... you need healthcare.....Maybe you can try the I dont know who the father is.... or just give them as little info as possible on him....and if my by some chance a case does get set up then if you are together the money will go right back in to your guys pocket! Good luck, and im sorry your having to deal with this

[tiredbuthappy]

i know the concept and principal bothers you, but it seems like you may need to s*ck it up and play along with the game the system throws at you. If he is supporting you anyways, will he really care how the money gets to you? I am sure that your fiance would rather pay child support through the system than see you go without insurance and the care you need. The money is going to you either way- just do it through official networks so that you can get the care you need.

talk with your fiance about the situation. while the situation is frustrating, i think that any concerned, supportive fiance would understand. it's not like he's going to be hit with official notices about child support without warning- you are not going behind his back. this can be a decision you make together. Good luck and stay healthy.