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Smoking & Preggers
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Smoking & Preggers

So my husband smokes. He doesn't smoke around me or in the house. But he smokes all day at work. He comes home smelling like smoke. I have asthma and yes, it bothers me and how I breathe but whatever. He says he smokes because I stress him out. And note, he's only started smoking again since I got pregnant because apparently now that I'm pregnant, I stress him out.
Right now, idc, but I've asked him multiple times if he plans on quitting once baby comes and he says, "Idk, if you stop stressing me out" nd I'm like, uhhhh having a new born baby EVERYONE is stressed out. But you just deal with it.
I feel like he's being really selfish and putting himself before baby's nd my health.
What do you guys think?
Do any of you have this problem?
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Avatar_f_tn
Id say hes being a bit selfish. i feel for u coz i didnt even have to ask my oh to quit. he wants to do it for himself and our baby... the way ur hubby is putting it all on u isnt nice and to me it doesnt sound like hes very happy atm... maybe you both need a heart to heart and see if theres any other problems hidden there. rather than just bein stressed. He may feel a bit insecure and need some attention and love.  xx i went thru all this with our 1st. if this is ur 1st baby together then he will snap out of selfishness when his bundle arrives :) xx
16 Comments Post a Comment
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3828469_tn?1358465925
Exact same problem here! He says the same things your husband says verbatim! I feel like he should quit but he says he can't I think he's just not willing to try. I told him all the risks involved for our new baby with him smoking and how he won't be able to come in the house smelling like that but it just goes in one ear and out the other. It's so frustrating
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Avatar_f_tn
OMG! I told my husband the same exact thing! I'm soooo frustrated with him because how can he say he smokes because of me?! I even got this whole pregnancy book on smoking and being pregnant and new borns and it outlines ALL the health risks but its as though he cares more about him not being stressed out than having a healthy baby.
I even told him that its going to suck for him when he wants to come home from work and hold his baby but can't because he needs to shower, brush teeth, change clothes, etc first and its just like he doesn't care. UGH!
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Avatar_f_tn
your husband is in the marines...mine is army -_____-
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Avatar_f_tn
I hate being around smokers...especially going to my familys house to visit.. My uncles/grandpa/ ALL smoke :/ ....outside and bring it in with them when they walk in...its so nasty! Give them men the febreze spray down lol and make them shower up! Lol i know not much.of a solution...would be ideal if they juat quit!!!
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3828469_tn?1358465925
Military men are a little hard headed lol. They get pressured a lot at work I know but dang this is a baby we are talking about. All I can do is hope he sees things differently when the baby gets here
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Avatar_f_tn
Wishful thinking I suppose.
Idk. I think maybe mommy's & daddy's are different. Like that saying "mommy's become mommys the second they find out they're pregnant. Daddy's become daddys when they first see baby"
I just know that my baby is the most important thing to me. And I wanna give her/him the best chance at being healthy and with a smoking dad, that's not happening. I want to punch him in the throat sometimes.
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3828469_tn?1358465925
I agree with that saying. Only time will tell but I gotta say if he doesn't at least cut back ALOT when my son is born I will punch him in the throat! Lol
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Avatar_f_tn
Have you tried asking him to switch to another form of nicotine?

For example the spitless tobacco pouches? They are actually pretty good if u get the mint ones. I used to use them and then i realized how much i really did NOT want to be addicted to tobacco so i stopped using them.
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3828469_tn?1358465925
Mrsnelson my husband loves those! He just uses those AND smokes now lol
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2020005_tn?1404435525
I don't blame you at all for the way you're thinking, try to get him into some other outlet of stress reliever. As far as switching addictions, I don't know if I'd do that either. My husband chews, and my 3 1/2 year old son looks up to him significantly, and sees him spitting, well he went through that phase for a while where he wanted to spit, and I had enough of it. He's trying to quit, but it's just as hard as cigarettes, and I've heard the spitless ones are worse because you actually swallow the contents of them (even if it's in a pouch, the juices/toxins still come out). Having a baby is way more stressful than a pregnant wife, so the sooner he finds outlets for his stress the better!
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Avatar_f_tn
I wish he would just see how immature he's being about the whole situation. Like did he expect pregnancy to be a breeze and rainbows and butterflies to fly out my a** while I was pregnant?
I mean first trimester I was a pain in my own a**, but now, its just an excuse.
I think I could get him to switch, but then like KTwone says, its just swapping one addiction for another. Oh how I hate him sometimes.
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Avatar_f_tn
Ohhh...my husband told me to try one one day because i was struggling to stay awake! Lol. My husband dips. Never smokes..but he does dip. At least if he is using spitless pouches he is only harming himself and not u or baby!!
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Avatar_f_tn
Yup! Mine voluntarily switched to dip because I threw up every time he came around me lol
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3763041_tn?1354909851
my bf has the same problems, he chews and he smokes and I used to smoke a pack of Newport 100's a day and I quit the day I found out I was pregnant, and he only increased his intake of both and it super annoys me because he hates that my outlet for stress is him now, but it is better than me smoking or something stupid during my pregnancy!!! last week he asked me if I plan to smoke after the baby comes and I said no because I don't want baby around it at all, but him even asking annoys me because he is so hipicritical! I just want what is best for our children and wish he could be as strong as me :) if I can quit cold turkey AND deal with the morning sickness, needles, stress over $$, and all the other not so pleasant things that come with being preggers, he should atleast be able to quit smoking!!
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3588173_tn?1357320784
I swear military men think its required to smoke! It doesn't bother me much but I dont want the smoke around my son either so I dont blame yu
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Avatar_f_tn
Id say hes being a bit selfish. i feel for u coz i didnt even have to ask my oh to quit. he wants to do it for himself and our baby... the way ur hubby is putting it all on u isnt nice and to me it doesnt sound like hes very happy atm... maybe you both need a heart to heart and see if theres any other problems hidden there. rather than just bein stressed. He may feel a bit insecure and need some attention and love.  xx i went thru all this with our 1st. if this is ur 1st baby together then he will snap out of selfishness when his bundle arrives :) xx
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