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363110 tn?1340920419

well, I was wrong, I ovulated yesterday or the day before! REad for more info

ok, I've been temping and OPK'ing but I ran out of OPK's about 3 days ago, using CM and temping I tell I ovulated I had EWCM and my temp has jumped up about .4 degrees, my normal temps were reading as low as 96.0*F or 97.0*F... today it's 97.7F... YAY!!! Two days ago We BD'd without the foam.... and today I've got tons of creamy CM...

my bb's are tender again and I"ve also had some bad cramping over the last 2 days......

have a STRONG feeling I'm gonna find out I"m preggo on the same day last year.. if so then this baby will also have TJ's same EDD of 9/13

I'm happy, but also nervous. Yesterday we saw a 1 yr old eating and talking and sitting up on his own and it made me cry knowing TJ won't do that at the same time (1 yr) maybe he'll do it at 2 yrs. ..... I just (and hubby) want to esperience a typical pregnacny and typical baby..... alongside with TJ.

Cindie
8 Responses
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304970 tn?1331425994
I just hope you wait.. Think about everything.. It is your decision, but I think now is NOT a good time! Keep us updated on TJ!
Helpful - 0
363110 tn?1340920419
Pinkbelle~ Thank you again for your response. I have no problem with waiting a few more months or even 5 or 6 more. And I didn't realize until I finished Updating my chart (kept notes over the week and put them on the chart  at the end here)  and noted the trend pointing to Ovulating on my chart. I had been thinking that I Ovulated right after AF and that my cycle was being wierd for some reason. I
you said You've worked with children and adults with D/S so I can see you know and have some experience knowing the care that I will probably have to expect to have with TJ. I definitely respect that.

A friend of mine who's middle daughter has D/S has enjoyed having 3 children but she told me honestly even tho it's rewarding its been hard, that having 2 Kids (her oldest and the middle who's got D/S) was hard and when she had 3 she HAD to get some help with them.  (I spoke to her this afternoon while visiting her family for a little while and getting to know her and her daughters)  so she helped me see it from a more personal view (I hope I'm saying this right...sometimes things don't come out the way I want) She did say that she loves the fact that all 3 of  her daughters are very close to eachother.

BUT I never ever regretted TJ or anything like that, he was not a mistake and I Do NOT feel that way. He's a special little boy and my miracle baby and I love him so much it hurts sometimes.  I also wanted to mention Diela that I personally think it's normal the way I feel and of course some thing's will change as he grows (I won't have as many sad days) , that my friend and others (new parents with children who've got D/S) have gone thru feeling similar ways sometimes and they feel more positive all the time, yet there are still some days of sadness every so often.  Of course we're still fairly new parents and I can see how we may still need more time to get used to our little boy and get to know him better
We will continue using the foam (we've used it since then everyday)  I have gotten my answers from you who've responded and appreciate them. I think from now on I'll just stick to updates on TJ and maybe offer advice of my own sometimes if I feel I can relate to someone. I don't regret making the post I did simply because I got what I feel are honest answers that got me to see things from a different perspective, and that it in turn helps me to figure out my own decisions.
Helpful - 0
284738 tn?1283106819
"I havent fully made up my mind. It's one of those things where one day I"m like.... I wish I were pregnant again, and another day I say... no I can't handle it. "

Well if you are tracking your ovulation and you are bd'ing on the days you ovulate without protection then you are trying..  

I just think that its your hormones doing the talking for you and if you really sat down and made a list... you would realize all the positives of waiting just for a little while.. TJ is your first special child.. take time to experience all of his milestones to the fullest!!!

I have worked with DS children and adults.. I have worked with the mentalled challenged and the elderly .. so I do know first hand how much care and resposibily goes into caring for those individuals. . I really do think as TJ gets older there will be EVEN more time comsuming and much more financially draining on you guys .. and it will be super tough on you.

I do however respect your willingness to accept and listen to all the things we are saying to you.. You aren't acting immaturely to our responses you are genuinely listening and thanking us for our opinions and I applaud you for that..

Honestly why not wait even two more months?  three months?  That way when Feb rolls around you will KNOW for sure how your fiances will be .. because with this economy no one is guarenteed anything... best of luck

Helpful - 0
363110 tn?1340920419
Diela~ By typical, all I want is to experience a baby who hasn't spent the majority of his or her first 6 months of life in the hospital. that's all... He's normal to me. But it's been so hard having him in the hospital.  You didn't hurt my feelings and I see where your coming from. I ;think I made my wording wrong when I said I want a typical pregnancy/baby.... I just would like to experience what everyone else gets to experience ALONG with TJ and allt he wonderful things he does/can do also.  I hope you understand what I'm trying to say.

LauraB~ I understand where you come from as well. We normally have been preventing, and are NOT actively trying as of right now, I understand that TJ needs to grow up a little bit. However if I were to get pregnant again I'd accept it and be happy.  right now we are not finanacially stable, however by Feb we will be. I've got a job about to start (IHSS) and I can stay home and care for my son or even take him witih me on errands since it'd be caring for my mom. My husband is getting a raise in Feb along with  hopefully a promotion. He's very secure in his job... It's just this last few months that's been shaky.
Too many thing have happened to us, my stepfather died, we lost a beloved pet who we'd had for 15 years. Then all the medical issues with TJ.  I have NEVER asked anyone to raise money for me. All I've ever asked for was information on places in our area that could help us out either with bills or other things.  I personally do not agree with any hormonal BC and the foam is the one we've found that seems to work for us ad we both like...... It may be partly an emotional decision.... I havent fully made up my mind. It's one of those things where one day I"m like.... I wish I were pregnant again, and another day I say... no I can't handle it.

I've talked to other parents with children who've had health issues similar to TJ's and they seem to see where I"m coming from when I say what I say (altho.. I DO tell them the whole story just as I have on here)

I don't know if you have a child with any health issues or not, but no one can personally understand how I feel or think until they've walked in my shoes. I"m not trying to be rude and I understand I made a post and that I could get negative or positve responses when I posted it.

Pinkbelle~ No one on here has hurt my feelings, as I said above, I knew what to expect when I made my post. :) So I"m not offended at all, I try to be openminded to everyones responses and in the end it's my decision... I feel that at the time (june/july) that we actually actively TTC we'll be financially stable, and if we are not then we will have to rethink things. Also... on the other hand, if I do wind up pregnant before then, I'm ok with it and would be happy with it. Probably not exctatic (sp
?) but happy nonetheless. TJ WILL require alot of care, and love. However I've also spoken to other families (in my town) who've had children with Down Syndrome or even just kids close together, and some say they liked it some say they didn't. some were in good financial standing and some werent. I know in the end i'ts my decision be it yes or no to try and actively TTC or get pregnant. :)

Thank you all for your opinions and thoughts on everything, I DO really appreciate it.

Cindie
Helpful - 0
284738 tn?1283106819
I AGREE AS WELL!!!  I think you need to take time and cherish that special little boy... he needs extra  attentiona nd extra care .. how in the world can you possibly give him that when you are caring for a newborn as well...  And you need to get your ducks in a row .. do you have a job or income that can support not only TJ but the new baby?

Some woman want to get pregnant again because they miss the attention and the special feeling of carrying a baby inside them and that is fine if your lifestyle permitts haveing two children so close together.. liek some other ladies have said.. u need to get your finances in order before even considering a second child..

Im sorry if I hurt your feelings... I am just trying to be realistic..  as you should be too. We are in a recession .. let me say that again a RECESSION! And you also said hubby was 100% on board with it...
Helpful - 0
293420 tn?1243142938
I have to agree with the other two posts. TJ needs to grow up a little bit and you and Carlos need to see how life is going to be raising him. Things are going to get harder as he gets older and you still have so much to learn about all of his needs and what's to come. Wait until he's older...maybe a couple of years or so...just to get used to your new life as parents of a child with special needs.

You need to get your finances in order as well. How can you afford another baby at this point?
Helpful - 0
304970 tn?1331425994
I honestly think it is irresponsible for you to be trying to get pregnant again so soon.

Aside from TJ's medical issues, you have no financial stability? I am confused Cindie. I can only IMAGINE that after everything you have been through, it MUST be "normal" to yearn for a healthy *normal* pregnancy. I just think that it may be hard for some people (myself included) to understand or even fathom the idea of you wishing and actually trying to pregnant right now? That seems so irresponsible and insane to me. It seems like an emotionally driven decision and a poorly thought out decision to me.

I mean you haven't paid an electric bill (you said it was like $1500!!), you said you share a vehicle, and you couldn't see TJ for a week at one time b.c no gas money? Don't you also live with a whole bunch of extended family in close proximity as well?? I just think it's borderline nervy that ask for support in ttc when you have people on your other message boards raising money to help you support what you have now and cannot.. I have never asked.. But do you have a job? Does Carlos?

I am sorry to sound harsh but I am worried about your situation. I am ALWAYS thinking and praying for you and your precious little TJ, but I sincerely hope you re-think this ttc so soon.. I think you need more stability in every aspect of your life before you try for another child..

Again, sorry to sound mean, but I have been "biting" my tongue for days now. I feel like we *sortof* get to know each other through posts and the last 2 weeks, your posts are sounding really *off* and causing me a great deal of concern..

Again, all the best and sorry if you are offended.. That wasnt my intention!
Helpful - 0
336902 tn?1242006090
I usually dont say much on this forum. It is just my personality, i will stay quiet until i really have somthing to say.... I have a son, just 2 weeks younger than your son and I have been following your story since you were pregnant with TJ. The fact that you continue your pregnancy even after TJ is diagnosed with DS, I really adore you for that.

It is none of my bussiness on whether you want the second baby now or later, it is just that when you keep mentioning about how you really want 'typical baby' is what bothering me. I just have one question, what is 'typical baby' means to you? When i look at TJ, he is typical baby to me. He has its own personality, it needs to be taken cared and loved just like other babies do. He can look at you, smile and response even though he may not hear very well. He may have heart problem, but the heart beats just like other babies. He is typical and to me and on his own way, he is way more special then other average baby.

I am sorry if I hurt your feelings, but when you keep mentioning that 'you want a typical baby' almost sounds like having TJ is a mistake that you need to fix, Trust me, it is not a mistake. You chose to bring him into this world way braver than any other woman, and I expect a lot more from you. I expect you to look at TJ in a special way, way beyond his health problem or his limitation. I expect you to adore him with all your heart, that when you think of something that TJ may not do when he reaches certain age, instead of crying about it, you should be proud to know that "You will get a little longer time to carry him around, to feed him with spoon, to help him sit because he is just wanna be my baby a little longer and he refused to grow up so fast because he knows you would miss all that"...

I apologize if I hurt your feelings again. I just want you to know, you have a lot more to learn from TJ, and you should cherish every moment you have with him. TJ has made you a mom and he is always be your baby,,, a typical one as you want him to be,



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