Circumcision Decision.

I'm having a boy and I'm glad because I already have a girl. But it's also my worst nightmare because now I gatta deal with my problem with circumcision.

Most places do not generally offer any sort of pain killers for the procedure and I think that is TERRIBLE.

BABIES FEEL PAIN.
They are human just like we are, and feel pain the same as we do!!!
Why don't doctors get that!?
Yeah, it's a quick procedure but god dammit it still hurts them!!!
I can't stand to think about it.
I don't want them to hurt my baby.

I know all the pro's and con's of being circumcized and uncircumcized, and I'd like it done because it's easier to keep baby clean, but I don't want it because I can't stand to think about what they're doing to him.

Hubby says he's getting it done whether I like it or not, because when he was a baby, he was too sick and didn't get circumsized till he was 14 years old, and doesn't want his son to have to deal with all the issues with not having it done like he had to.

So I'm wondering, if maybe I could somehow DEMAND my son get some sort of pain killer or numbing stuff for the procedure?
Has anyone else done anything like that and did it work?

[CYW]

well see this was my personal view on it...i mean you do what you do what you feel is right for you...talk to your dr etc...

my sons father is circumcized and i did not want my son circumsized...his view on it was what if it needs to be done later...my answer was well it will.. here they now charge 600$ to get your son circumsized because they do not want you doing it...it used to be free and in 2 years it went from 400$ to now 600$...the way i seen it was he is born that way...thats it...thats all..if he needs it done it will be done.. i mean how often do we have things that need to be done...a baby should be born vaginally but sometimes it doesnt happen now does it? to me personally as long as you keep it clean and push the skin back(of course you cannot push it all the way back until much later) but still...the foreskin is there to protect the penis from infections...you should maybe talk to your hubby about this too..he may have a view on this...my father was imminent that it would not be done and he would make sure of it...and like him i didnt believe in it.. some people say it looks better...i find it looks sickening..my friend had her son done and i wanted to puke when i changed his diaper...to me it just breaks my heart and i mean after having had your baby do you really want to cause pain...here they offer a general anastetic and still to me its a sensitive organ it may not hurt while but what about after...ugh i wouldnt have been able to change his diaper...i would have just cried and so well he is not circumcized but i think you need to do whats right for you and your son and your family regardless what people say..

[kellyjo82801]

I got my son circumsized the next day he was born and as soon as they were done with him they brought him back to my room with no trears once soever and didn't even looked like he cried at all that I even had to ask and make sure they did it. They've  been doing this for years. He doesn't remember it at all and I really DON"T regret it. I think that if it really hurt them a lot and had some horrible sides affects they would provide some medication before the procedure but I think that circumcision is kinda like little baby girls getting their ears pierced. It happens so quick. Best of luck on your decision.~Kelly

[kellyjo82801]

I as a mother wanted to do what was best for my son, not for me or my own personal feelings or views on this issue. I didn't want him mad at me at the end of the road if he needed it done when he's older. My brother was NOT circumzied until he was 4yrs old. I remember him complaining cause it really hurt him to pee. He couldn't barely walk. My mother had no choice but to get him circumzied. It was more painful and till this day he does remember it a little and is so thankful my mother did it for him. He's now 21yrs old.

[Victoria01]

I think this is a very personal decision that you and your husband need to make together. There are pros and cons on both sides. I have three-year-old son who was circumcised at birth and I do not regret it. Just remember that there is more pain and more discomfort if they do need to do it later in life. They will not remember it if done at birth, but they will if it has to be done when they are later. Always remember, do what you're comfortable with and don't let other persuade your decision.

[aly79]

i have 3 boys and i had it done for all of them of course now you have to pay for it but i think its the best thing my fiancee now hardly believes in hurting anything anyone especially a baby i mean we had major discussions about vaccinations as he didn't want them for our child but i told him it help him but the circumcision he was all for couldn't see the baby not getting it but yet again it a personal thing that you both are going to have to decide on  good luck

[Riot_Queen]

I see alot of you saying that it causes more pain and discomfort when they're older, but the only reason we dunno how painful or discomforting it is as a baby is because they can't tell us. Whether you remember it or not, it still hurts.

I really dunno what to do.
Hubby's gunna fight with me till it's done and I don't think I'll win.
I guess when I see my doc in 2 weeks for another ultrasound I'll ask her about it.
It's gunna hurt afterwards yeah, any surgery is gunna hurt. What bothers me is my baby having to feel them actually cutting.
I know what it's like to feel someone cutting you open.
It happened to me with my last c-section cuz they didn't do the epidural right and hadda knock me out after I started freaking out cuz of the pain.
I don't want my son to have to feel like that. It makes me feel sick to my stomach just thinking about it.
Ugh.

But this $$ thing... they're charging you to get your baby circumcized at the hopital now???
I thought it was spozed to be free??

[martikadragoon]

Riot~ They used numbing stuff with TJ, sure it hurt beacuse it was a shot in his weewee, but it wasn't too bad. I wasn't there when they did it since he was in NICU, but he was really swollen after and they said it was due to the numbing shot

TJ's was covered by insurance, but we will have to pay to get Mason circumcised. apparently it's not "medically necessesary" anymore.

[Riot_Queen]

Ugh.
I hate my life.

[Sunkissed19]

if i have a son im not getting him circumcised because my fiance isnt. i dont think it looks weird and he's never been made fun of or had any problems with it or anything. the way i see it is this used to only be done as a jewish religious thing and now people started doing it because its "cleaner". but if you teach your son to properly wash his penis as a young boy nothing is going to get dirty. Also, the baby is born with the foreskin so obviously its there for a reason or why would the big man on top put it there? we dont cut off a piece of a little girls vagina do we? we dont cut off any parts of them....because theirs no need. you teach your children how to properly clean themselves and you wont have an issue. i believe in it for religious reasons OR if the father himself is already circumcised only because i wouldnt want my boy growing up thinking he looked different than his daddy and not wanting to be that way. otherwise, i wouldnt be able to change a single thing about my baby boy...right down to his little man parts lol
p.s. have u watched a circumcision video? F that!! lol it looks like it hurts and the baby screams its head off...and then the penis peals and stuff for like months its really yucky and i would worry about THAT getting infected. but if ur husband is circumcised than i think u should go ahead and get it done so he doesnt feel different when the lemme see daddys convo comes up lol

[martikadragoon]

I feel sunkissed's reply is a partly inaccurate. Sometimes there are issues with repeated infections, and it can happen even if the foreskin area is cleaned properly My middle brother wasn't circumcised until he was a year old due to some mixups at the doctors office. (he was supposed to get it at 6w)
My mom was going to leave it and just teach him how to care for it, but even though she kept it VERY clean he began to get repeated infections of his foreskin and it would swell up horribly so he couldn't urinate. The dr's didn't know why for sure.   She finally got it done when he was just over a year and she hated getting it done that late, but since he was getting infections back to back it was the best thing to do.

The penis DOESNT peel for months usually at least not in my experience. my son had his, where they did the plastibell procedure and then once the ring came off and the scab went away (within a couple weeks) it was and is fine.  We do plan to get Mason circumcised, at the same hospital and the same way (plastibell), and for us it's about $300 out of pocket

[Sunkissed19]

sorry if my information was incorrect....im only speaking within my experience. none of the boys in my family or DF's family are circumcised and have had no problems...i wasnt aware that it often caused issues. and i meant that Sometimes it can peel for months and i said that because the twins i nanny for that ive been taking care of since they were born and theyre 5 months now.. and one of them still has little peelys around the ring area that i have to be careful of while wiping. i think it must be different for each baby...i was only trying to suggest my feelings and experiences i didnt mean to come across as that is the only way...its just not something i want to do because of my feeling and experiences. sorry if you or anyone else was offended.

[Sim80]

I wouldn't circumcise especially if because it's easier to clean is the only excuse :

1. An intact penis doesn't require special care, it just 1 second to wash under shower. Cleaning girl's vagina is harder, would you cut a girl at birth because it's easier ? No, so why do it for boys ? 80% of men in the world are intact and don't have any problems. Cutting off isn't the way to go. I'm curious if there are other part of body that should be removed because it's easier to clean.

2. Circumcision is permanent and removes the foreskin, it isn't a useless piece of skin. It's the most sensitive part of body with 20,000 nerve endings. It was performed in US in late 1800s to decrease sexual pleasure and masturbation. It used to be a barbaric practice that now has become a medical procedure with pseudo health reasons. It's just a cure searching for a disease.

3. I don't understand the idea that it would be more painful to get it done later in life ? What makes you think that if he isn't cut at birth, he will need it later ? For every story about someone who needed later in life and it was really painful, I can tell you a story about botched circumcision. Also, it's really rare when circumcision is required later in life. Infections can be treated with antibiotics like girls. Most men you know who have been cut later in life should could have been treated with a less invasive procedure. It's really rare when circumcision is the last resort.

4. Circumcision is painful, people recognize it' hard to get done when adult but claim it's painless for babies ? Adults are under general anesthesia and don't feel anything during the procedure, it's more uncomfortable than painful. However for babies there's no such thing. Sometimes, they use local pain killers but it's almost ineffective

[GRose]

My insurance covered it w/ both boys and we have state insurance. even if you dont believe that circumcision cuts down the risk of infections and STD's (which I do) there are still reasons to do it.  My sister is a nurse, she sees old me come in to the hospital all the time and need to be circumcised because they are no longer capable of cleaning it on their own and are getting infections. That alone was reason enough for me, I also dont want to constantly be on my son's a$$ about cleaning his penis properly......I also have an issue with the cosmetic aspect of it, not a fan of how a "natural" penis looks (sorry if that offends anyone, just being honest).

All I had to do to care for it was put some vaseline on the head and pull the skin back at every diaper change.

Good luck with YOUR (and hubby's) decision.

[GRose]

BTW-Neither of my sons had issues with their penis' peeling.

[chantal21]

It's completely up to you, but we made the decision to have it done. Jeremiah had it done right before he was 3 weeks old and we had no problems whatsoever. We actually called a mohel (no, we are not jewish) and he did a wonderful job and I loved that he came to our house to do it. I would hate to have to take my child to the doc and then drive him home like that, so it was convenient and it cost us $300. It was originally $500, but my husband talked him down a bit, and he was very happy to do so. It literally took 30 seconds! Jeremiah cried for a few seconds and then was fine. It looked great after just one week, if that and he had no issues with it at all. I was very happy. We plan on getting Jesse circumcised, hopefully next week by the same guy. He didn't use any numbing stuff, but gave him some sugar water before hand. He nursed right after he was finished and told me to hold him normally and he would be fine. Also, for the first 3 days we had to put gauze on it with tons of A&D then after the 3 days no more gauze and just A&D. Never had to pull anything back or ever mess with it. It healed and looked great (according to my husband, he would know better obviously)  It worked. I figure a mohel does this sort of thing a LOT, so I trusted him.
I hate the part right when it's being done, but it's literally over in seconds. As a mother, we never want to see our children in pain, but for our family, we want our boys to have it done, mostly for cleanliness issues. Everyone has their opinion on it and I hope you can figure out what you are going to do.

[martikadragoon]

Sunkissed~ i was not offended, lol. I too was only speaking of personal experiences. and I agree that babies are probably all a little different when they heal.

Grose~ i've actually never personally seen an uncircumcised man, lol. (Sure I had BF's before DH and got a peek 1 or 2 times but they were circ'd and DH IS the only man I've ever been with intimately... I also have never really been a porn watcher.)  guess I'm a little sheltered, lol

[JoyRenee]

She isn't asking for opinions on whether to circ or not! She already stated that she is going to circumcise him so stop trying to change her mind, people! We all think we know what is best but in the end, it's a personal choice that she and the father of the baby have decided on.

What she wants to know about is PAIN RELIEF for her child.

[Quinns momma]

My son will be having a circ done when he is 1 day old in the hospital. I am going to request that he does get an inj of anest for numbing purposes.  I can understand your concerns regarding pain relief.  No one wants to see their child in pain.

[Riot_Queen]

I went on you tube and watched a circumcision video on a newborn with hubby.
We've decided NOT to get him circumsized UNLESS they do offer some sort of numbing agent or anesthetic.
That video actually made me cry I can't put my baby through that!!!

Hubby wasn't circumcized till he was 14 and knows how to properly clean an uncircumcized penis, and so we can help teach him how to keep his penis clean when he gets older.

And if it doesn't work out because he keeps getting infections over and over again, I'll be more than happy to pay for him to get it done at an age where they WILL give him a numbing agent or anesthetic.
My mother said my brother wasn't circumsized till he was a lil kid and the insurance paid for it because it was a medical necessity cuz he kept getting infections.

So if the insurance sees it as an issue, they might pay for it.
If not, then I will.

Or if he's older and wants it done for himself like his father, then we will gladly pay for him to get it done.

I agree that if we're born with it, it should stay there unless it's a hazzard to you or your body.
I just can't do it. I can't.
That video was horrible. I can't do it.

[Sunkissed19]

its your decision as a mother and whatever you and your husband feel comfortable with is the right answer! im glad you two came to an even ground...(i told you the videos are awful!) my mom said when they asked her if she wanted to get it done for my brother in 1988 at the hospital (she was 18) she said she didnt know very much about it ...so they showed her a video....she didnt do it either lol! there are other health videos that explain the benefits and the cons and not just the violence of the cutting as well but they scared the **** outta me too. i really just think its a circumstantial prefference thing. im sorry if i scared you out of it by telling you to watch a video....but i wouldve wanted somebody to tell me that. Anyway, congrats on your baby boy! i bet you just cant wait to meet him!

[johannaviles]

My son had it the day after he was born, he looked just fine after it and it healed very quick!  
Its your and you  hubbys decision, dont feel pressured by anyone else, good luck!

[Riot_Queen]

I'm glad you told me to though I never thought to look for a video.
I didn't want it done in the first place because I knew that they don't usually offer anything for the pain, but hubby was fighting me on it cuz he wanted it done.
But once be saw the video, it kinda startled him.
I guess he really didn't know and hadda see it to believe it.
And now he agreed to not doing it unless they offer something for him.

I called the hospital I'm delivering at and they do charge.
I have to wait till Monday to call the billing office to find out exactly what it's gunna cost but she said she thinks it's $300.
Then I gatta call my delivery doctor and the pediatrician I chose for Aiden Monday as well because the lady said they both have to be there for the procedure?
And I gatta ask the pediatrician if he offers a numbing shot or an anestheic.
If not I'm gunna ask if I can buy a numbing shot for him to give to Aiden before the procedure.
If not, then it's not getting done.
Period.

The insurance should pay for it if it becomes a problem later on in life.
If not, I will.

[Victoria01]

Where I live they automatically use a numbing agent. My husband was with our son when it was done and said he only whimpered, never even cried. I would definitely insist on something for pain if you do decide to get it done. Best of luck and I hope all works out well for you and your son. :)

[Limonada]

I agree with Sunkissed - my DH isn't circumcised and so we didn't circumcise DH.  Also, our son had to have eye surgery when he was 2 weeks old - we didn't want to throw another (debatably "necessary") procedure on top of all olf that.

[Riot_Queen]

Ugh now hubby's parents are arguing with me about getting Aiden circumcized.
They won't f*ckin drop it!
I can't wait till next year when I can start working and we can get our own place!!!

Hubby's mom is all like, "You're gunna regret it if you don't do it! Josh STAYED having infections when he wasn't circumcized!"
And I'm like "Yeah, that's cuz y'all weren't taking care of him properly and he never learned how to care for it properly either cuz y'all didn't teach him!!!"

Aiden is MY son!
Why can't she back off and let me make my OWN decisions regaurding MY kids!?
She does that to me about Ivy too!
She's ALWAYS got something to say about what I'm doing, how I'm doing it or whatever.

I've been doing ALOT of research on circumcision today and I don't think I wanna do it at all even if they will offer a local anesthetic.
WOMEN HAVE LOST THEIR BABIES BECAUSE OF CIRCUMCISION ACCIDENTS!!!

Either that or their babies had to deal with side effects from accidents such as cutting off too much forskin on one side or the other causing a curviature in the penis.
Or just cutting off too much in general causing an erection to be too tight and therefor painful.
Slip-ups messing up the nerves in the penis making it to where that baby will never be able to experience an orgasm.
Accidental partial servering of the head.


I told hubby that and he seems kinda iffy about it all together now too.
He said he'd want to make sure he gets the option of getting it done at somepoint in his life though and we make it happen for him.

I don't think I want it done.
There's more pro's to keeping him uncircumsized than con's.
That skin is there for a reason.
It does not cause deseases it's there to PROTECT the penis from deseases.
It's also better for them when they're old enough, for sexual pleasure.
Hubby admitted that his orgasms aren't as pleasurable now as they used to be for him before he got circumsized.

I myself am not a big fan of what an uncircumcized penis looks like. I think it's looks funny, but I've never been with anyone but hubby and therefor never got to experience one first-hand.
And I think alot of women think the same way I do, cuz it does look weird.
But that's what a penis is SUPPOSED to look like. And these days, circumcision is so common, most women don't know that and think it's nasty to be uncut.

Babies don't have a choice in the matter, and I don't want to be the one to make that decision for him. I want HIM to decide whether he wants it done or not.
But if his pediatrician DOES offer a local anesthetic like a numbing shot or something, I'll discuss it further with hubby, and let him make the final decision because he would know better than I do about being cut and uncut.
He'll know what'd be better and do what's best for Aiden from his own personal experience.

But I want him to think and think hard before making the decision. I want him to think about if the risks are worth taking for a cosmetic enhancement of an organ that is very secrative and won't have to show it's face to the world unless he wants it to.

[Riot_Queen]

This is the vid I watched earlier but it's the full version and they added subtitles to this one so you can actually understand what they're saying. The other one they didn't so I didn't know what they were saying.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2k6dWrtUDg0

This is HORRIBLE!
I didn't cry this time cuz I heard what the doc was saying and I was too busy being P*SSED OFF at that doc!
The father thought the doc was gunna give the baby a local anesthetic and you know what the doc says!?
He's all like, "Well we mixed it into the mixture!"
Meaning that the stuff he used to clean the area being operated on before hand had "anesthesia" in it!
BULLSH*T!!!!
That dad didn't know any better and the doc is gunna sit there and LIE like that!!
That shows how CRUEL doctors are!!
They wanna charge and arm and a leg for a STUPID procedure that doesn't take very long, and don't wanna waste the money on something that's WORTH using!!!

I swear to god, if Aiden gets circumcized, I want Josh IN THERE when they do it and I want him to MAKE SURE they inject that stuff into his twinki! And he better not allow it to continue until they put it in there and give it a minute to take affect!!!

Omg I'm so mad right now!!!
I HATE IGNORANT DOCTORS!!!
They think that they're not going through it, they ain't feeling the pain, so it doesn't exsist!! It's not happening!!!
Ugh!!!!!!!!

[Quinns momma]

It is your decision and your extended family has no right to try to change your mind. Many hospitals do use numbing agents during the circ.  I know you saw the video and just want to stress that is not the norm. I worked 5 years in OB-GYN and had to attend many circs done in the office. We ALWAYS numbed before the circ was begun. This is often what causes the infant to cry. It does sting and slightly burn when the inj is given. After that baby is allowed time for the numbing meds to take affect and then the circ is performed.  Babies settle down very quickly after the circ is performed.  
You will make the decision that is right for you and your family. As I said up above I am pregnant with a little boy and he will be circ'd in the hospital prior to discharge.
Best of luck with your decisions! :)

[Lucey12]

My nephew got numbing cream for his...mind you we live in canada so it might be different here than there.

[sprarah]

While in nursing school I was able to see a circumcision. The doctors had put a numbing agent on the baby's penis before the procedure. I cannot recall the name of it but it had to stay on for 45min before they could start. The baby slept through the whole procedure and never so much as whimpered. They even had him under a warmer to keep him warm. The procedure went very quick. I think it depends on the hospital and your pediatrician but you CAN request something to be used. I had already had two boys prior to actually seeing it done and had both of them circumcized.  When I had my 3rd boy we also got it done for him as well. I had personal reasons and professional reasons for getting it done. My husband was actually against it until he researched it himself and he is circumsized. It has been proven uncircumsized men have a higher risk for infection. Regardless of anyones opinions or research done it is a personal decision. You just have to think about their life as an adult. I know a few men that were not circumsized as babies and really wish they were. My best friend was circumsized at 24 and said sex was much better afterwards. I also never paid a dime for my boys. and never had any issues with them after the procedure. But yes you definately can ask for an anesthetic and you can also demand to be present during the procedure as well if you so chose. Since your pediatritian is often the one performing the procedure or at least present, I would talk to him about your concerns. Best of wishes to you and your baby.

[jakesgal88]

I have three boys and all three were circumsized with no problems. The doctors explained the procedure a bit to me before they took the babies in and they do use a numbing agent. I did not get to be present so I am not sure if they used a shot or topical cream. I do know they bring your baby back to you right away and they were not crying when I got them. They are all older and of course do not have any bad memories of what happened or any problems. Like others have said, it is a personal decision, but you should not fear that your baby will be in lots of pain. Actual birth is probably worse than the circumcision.

[claire38]

Riot one thing to remember when u do searches on the internet u well get all kinds of results good and bad that one bad thing of searching for stuff, i looked up episotomy (sp) just to learn more about them and fournd horrible videos of what must have been dr videos when they have to learn about them. i personally would talk to friends relatives that had their boys circ. and another thing to remember u said "The insurance should pay for it if it becomes a problem later on in life.
If not, I will. " do u want it to become a problem tho?? then u have to pay for dr bills for an infection *if* he gets one. i'm not 100% sure on this but perhaps it may even cost more to do as he ages.

i know what ever u decide i know it will be for ur little one's best interest ;)

[Riot_Queen]

Hubby n I talked for a looooong time this morning on the issue, and to close the topic, we've decided NOT to have it done.
I've read just about all I could find on the matter, good and bad.
Yes, I realize it's easier to keep tidy down there with it done, but there's also alot of risks involved with the procedure and yeah, chances my son will end up with complications are slim- but I'm not comfortable with taking that risk.

Hubby's "Mr." down there, the doc had accidentally taken off a little too much skin on the left side, and therefor he's got a lil curve to the left further up the shaft. His doctor also did something else by mistake. I can't really tell what exactly happened, but he's got a couple indentations and folds on the underside that shouldn't be there because even though he's the only one I've actually slept with, I have fooled around with other guys before, and none of them had anything like that.
That just goes to show that slip-ups can happen to ANYONE. Thankfully Josh's were only minor and aren't noticeable unless you're really looking for it.

I dunno if my son will be one of the unlucky few.
All the other women it's happened to never thought it would have happened to them, but it did. And it COULD happen to me too. It's not worth it.
I'm not gunna let something as little as cleanliness, be my only reason for doing it.
Women get infections too from not being clean down there aswell.
We'll just have to teach our son proper hygene, and stay on his *** about it until it becomes ritual for him.

Hubby says all his life his mother made the decisions for him. What he was gunna wear, how he was gunna cut his hair, what friends he was gunna hang out with, what sports and after school activities he was gunna be involved with.
He said that he wants his son to be his own person and choose what HE wants.

He's said when he's 13 years old, he'll have the talk with him about getting it done and leave the option open for him. He may want to think about it and not get it done for a few more years, but that's fine.
Who knows, maybe he'll like being intact and want to stay that way.

That skin is there for a reason. For protection and for pleasure.
There has been doctors who found rings on the inside of the skin that work with the head of the penis for maximum pleasure.
I don't want to take that away from him if he doesn't want to.
Hubby says his orgasms aren't as good as they were before he got cut.

Babies don't have a say.
They have to be put thru this procedure because it's what they're PARENTS like.
I don't want him to be how *I* like, I want him to be how HE likes.
It shouldn't matter that I prefer a circumcized man over a one that's not because I'm not to one whose gunna be intimate with him when he gets older.
There are PLENTY of gals out there that actually DO prefer uncircumcized. And one day when he falls inlove and if he chooses to stay the way he is, she'll love him whether he looks funny down there or not.
Cleanliness is not a big enough issue to me to go ahead and cut it off because to me that's really unnecessary. An infection can be treated but if it becomes a never ending problem, then fine, we'll get it done. If not, we're gunna let him decide.

I want to do the best I can for my little ones and I think it would be best if I left him with the penis god gave him.

[pinkbelle]

the decision is yours. if i had a baby boy i would get it done but thats my decision. to each their own

[tiredbuthappy]

more and more kids are not getting circumcized. i worked daycare for years and never found it more difficult to clean the boys who weren't circumcized. and not one child i worked with had an infection. in fact, i always felt bad/uncomfortable cleaning the heads of the circumcized little boys when poop got crusted on it. it must not be comfortable having a cold wipe scouring the most sensitive part of a weewee :(

of course its a personal choice- i just don't think it's a medical necessity

[Vic85]

Being from the good old UK i find it strange that there is such a discussion about choppin the end of your litttle mans bits off. As you can probably gather its not something thats done over here. Ive only ever got intamate (not all the way) with one guy who HAD been circumsised and I found it a little wierd! My DH still has all his bits (so to speak) and never gets any infections, my 14 month old DS also has all his bits and also never gets infected. Just to put the other side of the story across that actually its not all that bad not to have it done. I think if i had the choice I still wouldnt put my sons through it-nature put it there for a reason!!

[Sim80]

I also think this idea that  a circumcised penis is easier to clean is just an excuse to justify this procedure and the very idea to perform surgery just because it is easier to clean is insane (it just takes a couple of seconds to clean when showering). Empirical evidence shows circumcision is a lie : all developped countries no longer routinely circumcise (except US with now a rate of only 56%) and don't have any problems. Circumcision was always used as an excuse because it was supposed to cure terrible diseases at that time : in late 1800s there was the fear of masturbation, then there was the fear of germs so hygiene was the new excuse, after there was fear of cancer that circumcision could cure and now HIV is the new reason to circumcise with the fear of AIDS. Almost all of these reasons have been debunked. I think this is also true for HIV, America has the highest HIV rates in industrialized world and the highest circumcision rate, most US men who died from AIDS were circumcised, when AIDS appeared in 80s almost all men were already circumcised. History shows it's just a cure searching for a disease. I believe circumcision doesn't cure anything, foresin is natural, perfeclty healthy and extremly erogenous; there's no reason to amputate it.

[LauraB78]

I just sent you a PM.

[rebekah385]

Hi,
i'm glad you and your husband came to an agreement. I have 2 son both are circumcised my first was circumcised in the hospital without a pain killer I insisted on being in the room and he did'nt even cry it was over in like 3 or 4 seconds and then he was just fine he had a plastibel and it did'nt even need gauze and was healed in about 2 weeks. My second son was born a year and a half ago and he had his circumcision done in the doctors office at his 2 week check up, this time the doctor did give him a shot for a pain killer he screamed from the shot and was upset more than my first that had no pain medication, so I don't know which way is best. I was in thr room with him as well and the procedure did'nt take very long this time it was a regular circumcision and I did need to put gauze and ointment on him for about 10 day and then he was fine. I had to pay $150 both times with the last one being a year and a half ago, but insurance did not cover, because it is considered cosmetic. I have seen both sides of the issue my brother is uncircumcised and has had no preoblems or infection on the other hand my sister-in-law chose not to have it done and cleaned her son very well and he kept getting repeat infections over and over and it caused a lot of issues and he ended up having to have it done at 1 1/2 and it was a much bigger deal and took a lot more surgery time and recovery time. In the end I think it all comes down to a personal decision about what you think is best for your baby and family, My husband and I decided to circumcise our boys, because my husband is circumcised and we think it is better, but my family (father, brother, uncals, ect.) do not circumcise mostly because of cost. good luck to you and your baby, and don't let anyone, but you and your DH decide what is best for your baby.

[MedicChick1]

I hope I do not offend you with what I have to say as that is not my intentions. First of all, I am glad you finally came to a decision that you and your hubby agree on. Second of all as far as your in laws go, basically ignore them. I love my in laws to death and I will take my mother in laws advice when I have asked for it. If she tries to make decisions in our parenting, I ignore her. this is not thier baby, it is you and your husbands. I got lucky and mine understand we are the ones raising our boys not them. Third of all as far as the circumcision itself, I feel it is a to each his own kind of matter. If you don't want to for religious reasons then fine, If you prefer easier hygene, fine. I have had all 3 of my boys circumcised and none of them cried or anything. I don't know for sure if they used anesthetic or not because I was in recovery from my c-sections. I am almost completely positive you can request anesthesia if they don't automatically do it. As far as the healing and pain afterwards, none of my boys have seemed to be affected *e.g. crying or fussiness or anything like that post procedure*. When you do get them circumcised *at least here* when you change their diapers you put a triple antibiotic ointment on a piece of gauze covering the penis so it will heal nicely and prevent the diaper from sticking to the penis itself. I feel that not having it done is just fine though because, like other posters have stated, if you clean it properly and you teach them how and make sure they do it right then you won't have issues with infection. Heck, you have a risk of infection with having it done! If you don't keep the head of the penis clean then it will get infected around where the shaft meets the head. I know you have made your decision already, but I just don't want you to think that most circumcisions go horribly wrong because they don't. I also trust that you and your hubby, as his parents, will make the decision you guys feel is best for him! Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy and teh delivery!!~

[LauraB78]

I think this post is interesting and inaccurate. People need to do whatever they are comfortable with. I wish you the best of luck. You may want to start a new post telling everyone that you have decided against circumcision as I think the issue is getting confused here.

Joy had defended you looking for pain relief options, but it turns out you now have decided that circumcision is barbaric. For those that commented and never had FIRST hand experience (with YOUR child), you should probably be CLEAR that YOU were NOT present and that you didnt care for the child/ren 24-7. Therefore, you do NOT know that the procedure NOR the aftercare were tended to properly. I have NEVER heard of a penis "peeling," but hey, who knows.

Again, I think its a personal decision and want NO part in a debate, I jus HAD to comment b/c this post is totally loaded with inconsistant information and innaccurate information..

[Riot_Queen]

I do want to thank everyone for their imput.
I will be talking to the pediatrician that I've chosen for Aiden about the subject even though we don't want to go through with it at this point.
But I just want to find out everything I can so we can make an imformed decision and maybe the thought of a GOOD numbing shot being offered, might shed a little bit of light and maybe we'll reconcider.

The only thing that still in the back of my mind makes me think is,
only 20% of male babies get circumcized everywhere else in the country, but I live in the south, and it is still about a 70-80% rate of circumcision down here. And although I was born in New England, and my mind is set different than everyone down here, we still live down in the south, and my son will be surrounded by the way people think down HERE.
And if all his lil boy friends are cut, and he's not, I'm afraid of him being outcasted because of that.

It just scares me that something could go terribly wrong and deform my son.
I've always thought of the worst, it's not just reading on the internet, my whole life I always thought of the worst that could happen and shut myself away from it.
And ontop of that, not being offered a good pain killer is truely a horrible thought to think about my son having to deal with that and there's NOTHING he can do about it.
I say that because I know what it feels like to be cut and feel it because they didn't do my numbing medication right when I went in for my c-section and the pain is the worst thing I've ever felt and it makes me sick to think about it even almost a year later.

I guess it all comes down to what my pediatrician says.
I'll post a new thread when I get a call back from him hopefully sometime today cuz I left a message.
I'll let everyone know what he says and our final decision.

[Riot_Queen]

Well, hubby still doesn't wanna do it whether the doc offers pain killers er not. He wants Aiden to decide for himself when he's older.
I'm completely happy with the decision.
Thanks all.

[Squall20202]

That is a great decision and I think you and your husband should get a lot of respect for it.  It is after all his body and only he should decide what to do in this regard. According to the UN ( United Nations ) it is the boy's/man's right to decide at the age of 18 if he wants it done or not. To be forced to do it or forced to decide to do it before then is illegal by the UN because it violates basic human rights. I live in the US and this right is violated constantly. BE PROUD, you are doing what is best for your child by letting him choose what to do with HIS body. You and your husband are good parents.

[Riot_Queen]

I agree that he should have the right to decide what he wants done with his body.
But I think most of the ladies on here are exelent mommies and daddies whether they get their sons done or not.
If they feel it's best for their lil one, then it's the right decision.

I do thank everyone on here for their thoughts and opinions.
I've learned alot from everyone on here about the topic, aswell as internet info and it helped hubby n I make a more informed decision.

[latinalonestar]

Several misconceptions to clear up.  Here are some facts:

1. In case you heard that circ reduces the risk of penile cancer...Penile cancer is more rare than male breast cancer. Penile cancer is one of the rarest forms of cancer. Breast cancer in women on the other hand is very common, yet we don't go removing the breast buds of baby girls.

2. In case you heard circ reduces risk of UTI...Foreskin actually protects against UTI if cared for properly, meaning you never try to retract for any reason. Those fallacious studies that were done in the 80s compared intact (uncircumcised) premature babies to full-term circumcised babies. Premature babies have a significantly higher risk of UTI. Also the parents of those babies were instructed to retract for "cleaning" which tears the foreskin off the glans (glands) and introduces infection. Besides, the study only pertained to the first year of life. After the first year there was no significant difference. One thing you should know is that girls are 4-6 times more likely to get a UTI than an intact boy. The occurrence of UTI in boys, regardless of their circ status, is very rare.

3. There are both protective and sexual functions of the foreskin. In childhood it protects the developing penis and keeps urine, feces and other pathogens from entering the urethra. In adulthood there are extensive sexual functions. This specialized tissue is packed with nerves (over 20,000), blood supply, muscle fibers, and cells similar to those found in the fingertips and lips. According to fine pressure studies and studies of the actual composition it is the most sensitive part of the entire penis. This composition allows the man to have more control during intercourse which is why intact men are less likely to suffer erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculatory dysfunction.

4. No medical organization in the entire world recommends routine infant circumcision. In its 75 years of existence the AAP has never recommended circumcision.

5. Circumcision permanently alters both the function and the appearance of a child's sex organ. Ethically speaking, doctors are not allowed to perform non-therapeutic operations on healthy children without medical necessity.

6. The proper care of the intact penis is to leave it alone. Only clean what is seen. Never try to retract or allow a medical professional to retract a child's foreskin. Thousands of cases each year are reported where a doctor, ignorant to the development of the intact boy, has tried to retract a child's foreskin. This is a form of malpractice. Trying to retract a boy's foreskin is like trying to wash out a baby girl's vagina. It leads to tearing, scar tissue, introduces infection and can lead to some more serious complications.

7. In case you heard circ reduces the risk of STDs and/or HIV...USA has the highest rate of STD/HIV transmission and is the only country that routinely circumcises. Circumcision might hide the symptoms of STD making circumcised men unaware that they have an STD and so they pass it to many partners. Also, studies report that circumcised men are less likely to use condoms, which is probably why the transmission rates are astronomical in the USA. Condom use is the only way to prevent against STD transmission. Over 500,000 circumcised, American men have died of AIDs

8. The circ rate in the US is currently 56% and falling. In some costal cities it is as low as 30%. Your son will be in good company in the locker room. Teaching him the value of his foreskin and the harms of circumcision is the best way to promote bodily integrity. Most intact children are appalled when they learn that some boys are circumcised, and feel sorry for those boys. As a side not my intact husband grew up in an era when the circ rate was much higher and never felt insecure about his body. Men love their foreskins especially as they mature sexually.

9.  It is rare that a man will need a circ later in life.  The problem is that most doctors in the US don't know about the normal development of the intact boy and they ignorantly tell parents to try to retract to clean.  This can cause infection, scar tissue and lead to complications later in life.  Also many doctors don't understand that it is normal for a boy not to become retractable until AFTER puberty.  Phimosis can NOT be diagnosed until puberty has finished.  In the rare event that a man is not retractable a steroidal cream will treat the issue without surgery or amputation.  Only 50% of intact boys are retractable by age 10 and the others sometime between 10 and the end of puberty.  The proper care of an intact child is to always leave it alone.  If you do that your son will have no problems.  

Interested to learn more? Please check out my blog that discusses the top 12 myths about circumcision and the intact male. I have many resources there for you to explore.  hxxp://tribalbaby.blogspot.com/

Please protect your dear son from the harms of circumcision. Give him the choice over the appearance and function of his most private area. By doing this you are not make a decision, you are letting HIM decide.

Best Wishes and please read my blog post.

[Riot_Queen]

Wow that's really interesting to read.
I didn't know that boys went THAT long without being able to be retractable.
Hubby's parents said that they retracted him even as an infant.
That makes me wonder if that's probably the reason why he had so many problems with back to back infections as a child and into his teenaged years until he finally got it done.

I'll have to let hubby read this. He'll probably be interested.
I should print it out and let my MIL read it to!!

[carriee522]

Congrats on your decision; I think you guys made an excellent, informed choice. I wanted to jump in and mention that my son is 3 and not retractable, my cousin is 7 and IS and his brother is 10 and not retractable yet...so it definitely varies and all are normal!

[KATE535]

Here in the UK there is no stigma associated with not being circumcised. I have two boys who have not had it done and have never had infections or issues with cleanliness in that area because of not having it done. There's nothing to say to me that my boys (or my partner) are any less clean than other males who have been circumcised. Poor hygiene is far more likely to be the cause than having a fore skin.
I too could not bear to have my baby put through that pain, but that is my opinion and everyone is entitled to their own beliefs on what is right for their child. But I could not do it. Why fix what's not broken? Nature has designed boys to be a certain way so why not let them be the way nature intends? I just feel sorry for babies who experience that pain so young.

Good luck anyway.

[KATE535]

Hear hear !!!

Couldn't have said it better myself.
I agree with all you said.
That was worth the read.

[Vic85]

There are advantages to being from the uk!!!

Anyway i agree hear hear latinalonestar, i thought it was strange they were talking about retracting the foreskin to clean-I have never done this with my son as here in the UK they tell you absolutely NOT to pull a little boys foreskin back as you can do some serious damage.
Riotqueen-good luck with your son and dont let the family try to persuade you out of your decision. Your son-your way whatever the decision is about.

[latinalonestar]

Yes, that is most def. the reason your husband suffered problems.  Here are some very important links for you.  Print the following pamphlets out and keep them with you.  Before every newborn exam make sure you remind the doctor not to manipulate the foreskin in any way, shape, or form.  There is no reason for them to do anything with the foreskin.  If they persist or argue with them, hand them these pamphlets and take your son to a new doctor.  Forcible retraction happens in the blink of an eye!  I've even had a doctor try to do it to my son after I told her to take her hands off his penis.  It is harmful and the equivalent of a doctor trying to put their fingers in a girls vagina.  A good rule of thumb to follow is that the only person to manipulate a foreskin is the boy himself.  ;)  Now during the diaper wearing years if anything (poop) gets on the penis, you just wipe from base to tip like you would wipe off a finger.   (You don't need to wipe after urination.)  I always shower my kids off if it is a really messy poop.  You never have to worry about anything getting inside the foreskin b/c the opening is a sphincter that only relaxes to let urine out.  The foreskin is also tightly fused in infancy.  Throughout childhood it will separate and the opening will widen.  Hormones are what is responsible for widening the opening, which is why many boys do not retract until puberty hormones have done their job.  What happens is that the hormones replace the fiber dense tissue with a more elastic tissue.   So when a person tries to retract a boy they tear the narrow opening and tear the foreskin off the glans (glands) (head) this creates a wound that can become infected and also can create scar tissue among other complications.

*Replace the "xx" with "tt" when you paste it in your browser in order to go to the link:

Answers to your questions about your intact son:
hxxp://www.nocirc.org/publish/pamphlet4.html

Dangers of Forcible Retraction:
hxxp://www.nocirc.org/publish/pamphlet6.html

Development of a Retractable Foreskin in a Child/Adolescent:
hxxp://www.doctorsopposingcircumcisi...kinleaflet.pdf

AAP Care for Intact Boy Guidelines:
hxxp://www.cirp.org/library/normal/aap/

Avoiding Circumcision after the Neonatal Period:  
hxxp://www.nocirc.org/publish/pamphlet7.html

And Last but certainly not least!!!  This is a very important article for you to read:
Protect Your Intact Son, Expert Medical Advice:
hxxp://www.mothering.com/health/prot...advice-parents

So glad I could help you protect you little one!  
Cheers,
Jen

[heatherlynn22]

we had both of our boys circed. they did when they were 5 days old (the day they came home from the hospital). they did administer a local into their little wee wee's (which was when they cried..they got a shot in the wee wee. i would cry too. lol) the procedure itself lasted for MAYBE a minute. by time the nurse brought them to use (about 5 minutes after that b/c they had to put the vaseline on their wee wee's and rediaper/dress them) they were cooing and giggling. the only thing we had to do after that was keep the penis covered in vaseline until the "scab" on the tip fell off. which was 5-7 days later. we have had no problems with their wee wees at all (besides them yanking on them as soon as their diapers are off). the doc did say IF they did end up getting a fever/infection or anything to give them childrens tylonol and to call their pedi. we never had to do that b/c they never got a fever or infection.

it does look gross afterward. their wee's were purple and red with the yellowish scab over the tip; however, after that first week the scab feel off and the wee's healed.

have you talked to your pedi about it? s/he could give you information on both circed and uncirced wee wee's and his/her opinion on the subject. it's always good to get a professionals opinion on something like that. i talked to my ob about it (he has 4 kids...2 are boys) and he said his OWN PERSONAL opinion was to do the circ (not why we did it. we talked and discussed it first) but did give us information and pamphlets on both.

[Riot_Queen]

No thanks, we're really not gunna get it done.
An opinion of a professional is not gunna cover up the truth about circumcision and change my mind.

Hubby has made it very clear that he wants his son to choose when he's "of age" and in his case, he's chosen to talk to him after his 13th birthday and leave the option open for him until he moves out.
Cuz he may not understand or want to get it done right away.
But he's got from the age of 13 till he moves out on his own to make up his mind and we'll provide the $$ needed for the procedure.

Plus I've read that a new descovery of getting a baby circumcised can effect a breastfeeding relationship and that is deff a concern of mine.
I breastfed my daughter for 8 months, and woulda went longer if I didn't get pregnant again and my body could have handled providing for 2 babies.
I plan to breastfeed this baby for his first year if it hairlips the president. lol
I don't want anything getting in my way from accomplishing that.

I think all in all, it would be better for the family that he be left the way he is.
Hubby says he feels bad that he got it done now.
It was his choice to get it done, but he was not informed properly. Only thing he was told was that most guys are cut, so maybe he'd like to joint the crowd.
He was also having problems with infections because #1 he wasn't properly cleaning himself because no one showed him how, and #2, his parents retracted him as a baby, and I'm pretty sure that's why he was having most of his problems.

I feel much better about having my baby as happy as he can be and am in no where near comfortable with putting him through trama like that for something as stupid as a circumcision.
Trama, even as a baby, has been proven to have long-term effects on them.
I don't want a tramatized baby.
Local anesthetics do not provide full pain relief and they still feel pain.
The local anesthetics are less effective than a spinal epidural for a c-section where you still feel the uncomfortness from the tugging and cutting.
I know what it feels like to be under the blade and your anesthetic not work. I am NOT gunna put my sone through that kinda pain. I wouldn't even put my worst enemy through that.

[ziggysgrl0724]

Of course this is a personal choice and all.....but I just want to say that I don't agree with the fact that it is almost being portrayed that those of us who do get our children circumcised(or want to) are purposefully hurting their child.  I did it with both of my sons, and even though my youngest son needed a surgery a few years later(for something that may have been related to circumcision but not definitely) I would do it again.  I know that IMO I have been with uncircumcised men, some of which were so unclean that there was an odor coming from his penis.  For me and my family, circumcision was the way to go.....of course that's not the same for everyone.  If people disagree with circumcision that is fine, and everyone is entitled to their beliefs and opinion.  I just don't like that it kind of seems like those of us that do agree with circumcision are evil people that get off on hurting their kids....that's all.

[Riot_Queen]

I don't think getting your kids circumcized makes you bad parents.
I think alot of parents aren't informed enough before making the decision though.

I'm not here to convince ANYONE to do anything against their will, but the facts are stated and everyone's opinion is taken.
I don't think that the procedure itself is a bad thing, but the way they do it, is.
They need to come out with a local anesthetic more effective for the baby's pain relief, and the fact that all these doctors KNOW what they're doing to these babies, and still don't use any numbing shots or anything in that sort as part of EVERY procedur, is HORRIBLE.

I dunno, think that parents need to be more informed about this topic and what is REALLY going on behind that closed door because I just feel so bad for babies that have to go through this.
It's a very hard thing for me to think about and swallow and it breaks my heart to hear about stuff like this happening to babies.
I can't bare to even THINK about babies being hurt nevermind actually see it for myself like I did on that video.
I have the biggest soft spot in my heart for babies now that I'm a parent myself, and I just can't stand for anything ever happening to my children.
Atleast I can save my own kids and try to help others.

[AHP84]

I had my son circumsized and breastfed him, and I can assure you, our breastfeeding relasionship was not altered in any way. As soon as the lactation consultants taught him how to latch on (which he was unable to figure out on his own BEFORE his circumcision), he breastfed with no problems for eight months. He weaned himself when he became much more interested in eating solid food.
I'm having another son in February, and I will be having him circumsized as well, and also breastfeed him.
I've read every post there is to read in these forums about getting it done vs. not getting it done, along with plenty of medical studies from other sources, so I know I am well informed in my descision. My husband and I feel this is the best descision to make for the boys in our family.

[robertsam]

I think we all need a little rational thought here.

The fact is that the rates of ALL  problems claimed to exist from not circumcising males are lower in Intact countries than in circumcising countries.

Not only that that, the rates of  problems CAUSED  by circumcision are higher than any that occur from not being circumcised if the intact penis is not mishandled.

There really is no rational reason to ever circumcise an infant without an immediate medical need.

The only people in the world who circumcise are mostly Americans, Jews, and Muslims--less than 20%.

[djdude223]

"Who knows, maybe he'll like being intact and want to stay that way"  - Wow, you think?