just wanting to vent

[givinguphope400]

Question: How would you feel if you found out that your sister-in-law is having her second child? Here's the gut kicker: her husband is your husband's twin brother who just happens to think that he's better than your husband in everything that he does or has, when he lives off their parents, and can barely support the family he has now. not just saying that to be mean, i'm saying it because i've seen it. He's even had the audacity to laugh at my husband's jobs (one being a cop, the other is a roughneck), when he couldn't keep one job at a time, let alone two!  Second gut kicker: You find out on myspace, and you also find out that she's at least a month if not more, and YOUR friends found out when she found out, but no one's bothered to say a word to you about it. Third gut kicker: your husband has been spending everyother week at his parents' house while he's at work, where they live, and no one has bothered to tell him either. This may not make sense to some, but it hurts to think that they had no intentions of telling us any time soon! Thought: maybe they just didn't want to add to our pain. Possibly. Could be. However, finding out this way hurts more because not only are they being blessed again, but for some reason we weren't important enough to be told about it.

[ladybugbob1029]

I'm SO sorry you are having to go through that!!  One:  It's crappy that they wouldn't share that with you guys, but maybe it was honestly only bc no one wanted to rub it in when you guys have been having trouble.  Families can be SO irritating - and I think every family has someone like your brother-in-law in it...I know mine does!  Hope you feel better now that you vented!  Hang in there!

[kikicoates78]

I'm really hoping that their intention was to spare your feelings, BUT did she think you wouldn't notice??? I'm sorry you are dealing with this stuff! I hope it is your turn soon!

[givinguphope400]

Ya'll are amazing people! Everyone is so nice, considerate, and angels. Thank ya'll so much for being a wonderful support system!
I love my sister-in-law, and she isn't one to want to rub it in my face. She's never been like that. my brother-in-law is a different story.  I am happy for them, but yes it hurts so bad. As far as families being irritating-You have no idea! LOL!! Sometimes, I can't even imagine them being real people. It's like they don't use their heads or something. When my S.I.L got pregnant the first time, we were told right away. Everyone knew we were trying for about two years at that time, but we had the phone ringing off the hook. That's another reason why it upset me this time. It hurt, but I was happy for her. Granted, we didn't get along as well as we do now, I was still happy for her. However, I know how my husband's family is when it comes to women being pregnant in that family. I've been through several while being married to him. They are always having family functions, and it seems like they increase every year when someone is pregnant. They go around feeling the belly, asking how they are, etc. and then while you're off in a corner somewhere, wanting to be anywhere else but there, they somehow always manage to find you, and then the questions start. "So, (in a snooty, better than you, voice) when are ya'll gonna start having some? You arent getting any younger" " Yeah, you better hurry up if you want to catch up with her (talking about my S.I.L)." You just wanna look at those ******* and say something, anything, but you don't. You just smile, and shrug your shoulders. because you know that if you say something, than you're just jealous, being selfish, trying to create drama around yourself, because you can't handle someone else having it. It doesn't matter, whatever they can think of, they'll say it. The problem is, shrugging your shoulders doesn't work either. They still say your just being a *****.
I tend to stay away from family functions when a pregnancy is involved, which is wrong because it's not my S.I.L fault. She's just wanting to add to her family as well, and shouldn't have to put her family plans on the back burner because I can't get pregnant, but it's everyone else aroundd there that gets under my skin and makes me feel like I'm less of a woman, because I haven't had kids yet.

One of my husband's friends in the military wrote me today, and told me "God worked hard for six days....and he thought of everything."  That small little quote made my day today. It made me realize that God hasn't forgotten about me, even though I might think he has sometimes, and will still get mad, angry, upset, whatever the emotion... God still remembered evverything.

[JoyRenee]

I've been trying for a year. Out of the blue my SIL decided to start trying even though they filed for bankruptcy and don't have anyplace to put a baby. She got pregnant in 2-3 months? Everyone got told the "great news" outside while I was inside, BY MYSELF. But I heard her mom screaming in excitement and could hear them all through the screen door. I literally wanted to throw up.

She doesn't act happy or excited, even though they were trying. And I'm sick of everyone thinking I'm following in her shadow (we each have two children and we were pregnant together both times). So I stopped TTC for now and just letting things happen if they happen.

Sorry your BIL is being such a PAIN and jerk. Just be happy knowing that at least YOUR hubby isn't like that!

[ladybugbob1029]

I'm glad to see you have faith!  Without that we would be nowhere!

[laura1985]

oh man i feel your pain. my sil is a dragon from hell. i posted last week about her. i cannot stand her. and whats worse, my dh takes her side 99% of the time. when she got pregnant last year with her first baby, i found out at the same time i was pregnant. we were due within two weeks of one another. i miscarried, followed by 3 more miscarriages. her daughter is only 7 months and they started trying again last month. low and behold the month they start trying she gets pregnant. she has been rubbing it in my face. i have decided not to try anymore, and was told by her that i was "selfish" for not trying to give dh a baby. its not her concern, and trust me i put her in her place.

im not gonna lie, i am very envious of her. my husband and i tried for so long and had 4 miscarriages. she had two abortions back in college, and then the month after she gets married she is pregnant. i guess life just isnt fair sometimes. some people are just ignorant.