Could use some marital advice??

[risky_momma]

I guess my husband and I would still be considered newly weds since we haven't been married a year yet. But have been together for almost 2 years. Anywho...I  will be 18 weeks tomorrow..and although he is excited about having a child...he has a really bad temper. He can go from zero to sixty at the drop of a hat. I have no fear at all that he would ever harm me..but it's getting to the point that it's getting ridiculous.  In fact he got mad because I told him I was going to have my mom come over and help give me decorating ideas for our living room. And he was afraid that she would rearrange it and get rid of stuff when that's not the case at all. I'm hoping once the baby comes it will calm him down and be less angry. But my fear is that it won't. He already knows how I feel about his outbursts...but I think because he's so set in his ways...he won't change...can anyone recommend a helping solution to my delemma? Anything will be helpful.

[octoberpumpkin]

Having a baby won't make him calm down, if anything it will put stress on him and make the outbursts continue. I would strongly suggest counseling. A stressful, loud environment is not healthy for a pregnant woman or a baby

[yukijae]

Also avoiding extra stress helps. Sometimes the main reason for my anger was the stress someone was causing me. I avoided them and cut them almost out of my life and I stopped being so mad. I know avoiding people entirely isnt always possible but identifying the reasons behind his anger is crutial to him calming down. I used to break things and throw hissy fits and have lots of moments where I was less than lady like. Im sure he will be ok. Maybe its just the stress of the coming baby? Maybe he wants to be included? I think its just  As stressful for them as it is for us! Mines already nervous and asking about how im feeling all the time I see him and hes also running around trying to find work. Im only 8 weeks now and hes already like this haha :)

[yukijae]

Idk if this will help but it has helped me in the past when I had problems with my anger.

1.) Sprinting til you cant go any farther
2.) Going for a hike (in a park with trees and hills cuz the terrain helps)
3.) Locking myself in my car and screaming til im deaf and hoarse

I found that most of my anger was cuz I was so pent up with stress and I didnt know any other way to get rid of the feelings

[nini1022]

My husband and I have been married for a little over a year and I'm 35 weeks in a day or so.  I think arguing is a little expected early on in a marriage to a certain extent.  Unfortunately in my marriage I was the aggressor and having outbursts and tantrums. Thank goodness my husband is a calm man and patient.  I realized I was having some issues with myself and I took it out on him. Learning to communicate with him even when I'm angry and learning to listen has helped us tremendously. Sometimes it takes someone on the outside to make you realize something your partner has been saying all along. Also your response to his anger is equally important, but that doesn't mean walk on egg shells either.

[Newmummy657]

My husband and I argue and my god he is stubborn but he doesn't just have an outburst like that, maybe what the lady said about a therapist. I'm sure he is a good man good husband and will be a good dad but when he can get so angry that fast their may be an underlying issue that he may need some help with. Just ask him if he would go and you would go with him if he likes. I guess you  know him best so you know how to approach him.. My hubby is type 1 diabetic when his sugar levels are out of wack he loses his temper easily, I know your hubby probably isn't diabetic but incase he is this may be a reason.  

[BrayBriMy2Girls]

I suggest having him start therapy

My hubby was that soo rude&  *** he was dig.  bipolar. ... and very bad but he was in intense therapy for 2 mo. No medicine (we don't like pills....) but that was a breaking point for him.... somone else telling him he's a good man but needs to find his own ways of finding breaking point & want that instant calmer.... he counts or just walks away....  just because it's the better option for him cause he will never want his kids to act or get treated like that. ...

hope this helps!  Xoxo good luck

[risky_momma]

You are totally right. Its just hard sometimes since I'm pregnant and my hormones get the best of me at times. Since this is both our first child..I will go ape s**t on his *** if he loses his temper on them lol

[GxoK]

It might just b something ur gonna have to simply roll ur eyes at and go on about ur day. Maybe he'll grow out of it with age. I know how u feel tho. I just quit complaining at my husband about it. Unless he gets to b too much at the kids, I just ignore him. I know that's not good or helpful advice but.....