babysitter who is not stable

[julybaby1587]

Someone very close to the family Keira persisting on babysitting my little one once she's born. She has a history of mental illness and self harm. Although it was a long time ago, i do not trust my baby in this person's care. My boyfriend seems to have no issues with trusting this person. Without being insulting or sounding judgemental i keep reminding my boyfriend of reasons why its not a good idea. I care for this person and do not think badly of her, but i don't trust her alone with a baby. In my profession i have to work during the day. He works overnight and has the opportunity to work during the day, but we need a sitter. As a ftm, i already don't eat to leave my baby with anyone. Im so stressed over this and Im only 24 weeks. We have time but I'm just so annoyed that he cant see my side. Mental illness is not something to be branded for or ashamed of, however i do not trust this person. How can i get my boyfriend to understand?

[Madisonsmom1]

I can relate, I'm very close to my sister but she takes up to 4 different prescription pills several times a day. She always wants to babysit and have sleep overs with my daughter but I don't trust that she's coherent enough to pay attention. My daughter is 9 months old, last time I let my sister take her over night instead is having my daughter sleep in her pack n play they both slept on the couch with the coffee table pushed up against it in case she rolled off in the middle of the night. My niece told me she checked on them and saw my daughter had rolled off the couch and to the end of the coffee table and was about to fall off and my sister was out cold from her pills. I don't know how to tell my sister I don't want her to babysit anymore. She's very sensitive.

[misscan]

I will not trust anyone,  I will go back to work but only if my husband and sister alternate to babysit.. there is do many bad stories with bad endings about kids and babies, plz chooses carefully your baby only has you to really care for her.. better worry than sorry.... good luck

[SugaSpiCeDiVa]

Go with your gut feeling... you can't allow this person 2 keep the baby... You will constantly be worried about his well being...which will cause more stress and being a ftm is enough stress in its self...

[AshleyB1221]

Can you nicely find a way to tell her that you appreciate her offer bit have already made other arrangements for child csre? You will keep her in mind though in case of a backup?  I had to do that with a friend, very similar situation. This girl who used to be my best friend has a history of drug abuse  and in and out of rehab and facilities.  She claims she is clean now but when she was staying with me for a wk over the winter I noticed some pills of mine were gone. Anyway, she kept telling me how excited she is to babysit when he is born and because she's a stay at home mom it will work perfect and I dont need to worry about paying her and blah blah. My husband and I both refuse to even let her near our son even when we are there bc I'm too scared. I told her that I will def keep her in mind and appreciate her offering to help us but I think that I'm all set with child care.  

[julybaby1587]

Don't want to leave*

[julybaby1587]

Keeps persisting*