2nd Miscarriage, 39 years old

[ceggie]

I had my first child at 36 years old. The pregnancy was free of complications, I was terribly sick with morning sickness for the first 4 months.I had a healthy baby girl in July of 2004.  

At 39, I got pregnant again. I had no pregnancy symptoms at all and actually thought, "This is great, no sickness." Little did I know my hormone levels were so low, I miscarried at 8 weeks.

Three months later, I got pregnant again. This time I suffered morning sickness again, at all times of the day. My doctor tested  and my blood levels were all good. "Excellent" was his exact word as to how good my levels were. The equipment in his office could not pick up a heartbeat, so he sent me to the hospital for a scan. At 8 weeks, the hospital scan saw the heartbeat immediately, the report was good, thumbs up all the way. We saw the heartbeat Monday morning. By Monday afternoon, I was bleeding. Went back to doctor Tuesday and he sent me back to hospital where they confirmed there was no longer a heartbeat and I was having my second miscarriage.

I am devastated. Thursday, I had a D&C and the doc sent the tissue for tests. He also did this with the first miscarriage, the results were inconclusive.

I am wondering if I will be able to have a successful and healthy pregnancy or if my time has passed. I will be 40 in 2 months. The thought of trying again is so painful. The thought of never having another child is excruciating.

I fear at my age, with 2 consecutive miscarriages, I may never be able to carry a pregnancy to term again. I am having such a difficult time with this. I just don't know where to go from here. I am so angry and sad and having a hard time accepting it.

I spend the day trying to be upbeat for my daughter, but once she goes to bed at night, I just sink.

[hyjdan07]

Be encouraged. My grandmother had her last child at 47. The moment you stop think about it, that's when the magic will truly happen. Good luck to you.

[ceggie]

Thank you. He didn't even want to try after the first miscarriage, but I talked him into it. As for trying again, I am just choosing not to discuss it with him right now, but I already know in my heart that we  will try again.  Doctor advised waiting until at least the end of May, so until then, I will just step back and give him some time.

Congratulations on your pregnancy, I am so happy to hear that you have had success after so many heartbreaks. It's inspiring.

Best of luck to you, too and I look forward to the announcement of your baby's arrival.

[AshleysMom]

Hi:

I'm really sorry for your losses and unfortunately know how you feel.  I had DD at age 36, then 10 mcs in a row.  I am now 31w2d at age 40 so there is hope.  All my tests came back normal, but one that they were able to do on the embryo showed an extra chromosome.  (most of mine happened very early - only once did we see a hb).

My DH didn't want to try either, like after MC number 3.  I wanted to keep trying.  Let's just say it's a good thing men don't know how to track a woman's cycle all that well.
I think that men just really don't know how to react to all this stuff...

Anyway, I do wish you the best of luck.

[ceggie]

Thank you all for your kind responses. I got the results of the tests they did after the D&C and they found nothing abnormal. So the doc had no explanation.

My DH doesn't even want to try again. I am not ready to close the door. Guess all we can do is let time heal for awhile and then take it from there.

I appreciate the support and stories. They really help.

[Oly1970]

Hello I am sorry about your loss. I understand what your going through. I say give your self time. Your not to old. I had two healthy baby boys and had a m/c then got pregnant with my dauhter she came out healthy. Then three years ago we wanted to have another child we tried and had 3 m/c's. We thought we where done and now I am 11 weeks preg. This was after I had a cyroablation (freezing of the lining). I wish you luck. If you get preg. again I would have your Dr. check your progestrin level. I get progestrin shots every week.
Best of luck

[hope37]

I am so sorry to hear of your losses. I don't think you are too old at all either. It sounds like you need to give yourself time to heal and grieve your losses. I am 37 years old. I had a healthy girl 11 years ago and tried to get pregnant and miscarried this past January. I am now 5 weeks pregnant and and scared to miscarry.In fact we haven't told anyone about our news.  I just take one day at a time and try to stay positive.
When I did have the miscarriage(I am a teacher)and many of the moms of my students came forward and told me of their miscarriage stories. I had no idea how common miscarriages are! Three of the Moms were your age and older (one lady was 43) and had two to 3 miscarriages and went on to have healthy children(which are now my Kindergarten students). I can not tell you how comforting it was to hear their stories and I hope that may help you. I hope this helps you and wish you the best.