Alcohol at 20 weeks

[stressymum]

I don't drink a lot of alcohol in pregnancy - probably about 1 small glass of wine every couple of months - but have stupidly accidentally consumed too much alcohol at a special occasion at 20 weeks and am terrified I have compromised my baby's hearing/sight or general brain development.

I thought I had planned carefully - selecting a low alcohol sparkling wine that was 4% and planning I could drink 500ml over a whole evening (equivalent to 2 units or one pint of beer) with food.  However the next day I felt awful - like a hangover and when I double checked I'd bought something that was 5.5%.  I now wonder could it be mislabelled and have been even stronger?  I have had unexpectedly bad reactions to white wine in the past - terrible hangovers after 1 or 2 units so could it have been a chemical thing?

Now I feel very stupid and won't be touching any more alcohol.  Will I have harmed the baby?

[jbrooks39]

im sorry if you take this wrong but this really upsets me. if you knew you were pregnant and you still got intoxicated,it was not an accident.yes this could harm your baby.even a glass of wine every once in awhile is wrong.do you plan on breast feeding your baby? i hope not with the drinking you cant seem to stop.some of us have tried and tried to have a baby(i havent been lucky yet)and would do everything in our power to make sure we do everything that we can to have a healthy baby.please stop and think of your baby,again im sorry if you take it wrong,

[tahariel]

You should check with your doctor.

And I do agree, once someone finds out they are pregnant, they should be choosing NO alcohol for the safety and health of the baby. There are plenty of enjoyable non-alcoholic beverages to choose from during pregnancy.

[kellym]

It's a personal decision to have a glass of wine every now and again.  I do enjoy one on  occasion. I do not think I would ever plan to buy an alcohol so that I could drink it over the period of the whole night.  You could consult your doctor but I think your baby will be just fine. I do not condone it but wouldn't let it happen again.

[mrs5077]

I agree, it is a personal choice, but wouldn't you want to give your baby the best possible chance you can? I don't drink or smoke, not even pre-pregnancy (my choice), but if I did I would have quit as soon as I found out I was preggo. I don't know much about alcohol or wine, but don't they have the non- alcohol tpyes? Maybe if you really need a drink you should give one of those a try. I do think your baby will be okay, but you should be more careful in your decisions and do consult your OB.

[scootie]

The freeling of being hungover is mostly caused by being dehydrated and it could be that you had some low-level dehydration to start with and then had some wine and then did not drink any more water so you felt crappy the next day.  You can talk to your OB if you like, for reassurance.  I doubt that he/she will be any where near as judgemental as the above comments.  There is nothing your OB can do to "fix" any possible harm (which I don't believe you've done). So if you don't have to call him/her if don't want to unless you feel you do have a problem and you want his/her help finding services.  Look, while here in the US the party line is NO BOOZE WHEN PG but the truth is that is not the case in many other countries.  In France many docs reccommend a glass of wine per week.  I am not condoning tequila or anything of the sort but after organ genesis is complete it doesn't seem so terrible to have a glass of wine.  When I was PG with my son my OB said that a glass of wine a week in the last trimester was fine.  Also, I disagree with the comment about planning how many units to drink over a whole evening.  It is very responsible, whether PG or not, to set limits on how much alcohol you feel is appropriate to drink in an evening and stick to the plan.  The equivialnt of one beer throughout an entire eveing is not a lot.  Good luck.  The world is a hard enough place, it doesn't need your help to beat you up so go easy on yourself.

[marie1210]

I've often wondered why it is so hard for some to stay away from alchoholic beverages when pregnant.  I've seen this argument soooo many times.  What is safe and what isn't...the discussion goes on.  Is alcohol so important that you can't abstain for 9 months?  To me, that seems to be a problem.  Your baby is probably fine but just think about your actions in the future.  

[vsentz]

Some people just don't get the importance and the RESPOSIBILITY that is to be an expecting mother and to do EVERYTHING there is to carry that child healthy to term.
There are mothers here in this board (and I'm sure out there too!) that are struggling for amnio results coming back with a disorder... and here you are, saying you had an 'accident' because you can't stay away from damn alcohol??? to me that is just lack of that motherly sight, lack of responsability and lack of love to your unborn baby. I really wish all the expecting mothers would feel what us ladies (that have struggled and cryed beyond words for years, longing for at least ONE child) feel when our dream comes true.... being pregnant is NO JOKE, being a mother is something you chose, and as a mother, be responsible. (and care at least a little for your baby....)

[elizabeth250]

I was born in the 60's and our mothers all drank and smoked and had no problems then.  My of the women on this web site probably have bad eating habits, don't exercise, drink too many sodas, etc.  After 3 months, yes, you can have a glass or two of wine.  Please ladies get off your high horse.

[Tennesseegirl]

funny how befor you turn 30? you think you can teach and know it all. ??...and wow.. some not even pregnant and commenting... I dont know how old this lady is? but.. I dont think she was asking for aproval, or advice on what she did?????
sounds to me like she made a mistake and now is filling quilty of her actions. God forbid .. Hell.. if you look at the facts.. I would think a glass of wine would be better for the baby then a diet coke!!!! anything... to much of is not good. too much working out  can harm the baby... (shakes my head)
I know my cup of coffee is bad for my child too but geez.... there comes a time and a place where you think enough is enough. ...and I really dont think its going to hurt her.. but look at  the news.. now coffee can hurt the futus... seems to me that the only people here that are getting affended are the ones that are trying their hardest to get pregnant? and yea... that suck.. Im sorry for you. Just maybe your not taking good care of yourselves??? see how stupid that sounds?! and sooo judgemental!!
I dont think comments like responsability has anything to do with bad dna? if that was the case here?  we all could pick and judge. yes.. Im sure there are those that abuse and hurt the unborn!! there are those that kill there babies too. after their born!! This women doesnt strike me as either. sry...anything can be picked on  and the actions.. but to tell her she has a chance of damanage a child over this ??? and to be scolded like a child for a question and concern.... shame shame..I think we all are afraid enough as it is to have an un healthy baby.. and to point fingers at, is just really mean.
sry...my hormoans are up and I just couldnt leave this post alone. I tried.. I really did. I hope I dont affend anyone.. I got affended at the replys and had to reply..
she said...
Now I feel very stupid and won't be touching any more alcohol.  Will I have harmed the baby?
doesnt sound like she has a drinking problem. Maybe Im wrong...
to stressymum....
at 20w I wouldnt think you harmed your baby?... I think you prob. had a bad reaction. alcohol will do that to some people. I love to have my drinks and being pregnant I have choosen not to, but Im not to say I will never... and wouldnt fill quilty if I did.  I would just watch my drinks and be extra careful. because it does and can get out of control. It sure in the heck, doent mean I dont love my baby and am not being a responsable mother.
good luck with your pregnancy...its hard enough as it is at this age. Just be careful and try to take the best care of yourself.

[Tennesseegirl]

omg... sry.. didnt meat to write a book... yea.. its my hormones...way out of control...lol

[vsentz]

Girlfriend, I really like you, but I gotta say: I still stand by my comment. And if you think I am mean and judgamental.... so be it. Doesn't affect me in the least.....
I am not comparing any alcohol drinking with DNA... I am saying HOW in the hell can someone be so damn irresponsible and drink something IS PROVEN to DAMAGE your unborn baby.... when there's TRUE concerns about unborn babies to mothers that would give up ANYTHINNNNNNG for their babies to be born 'normal', there's women that just had learned their babies have an anormality, and they've done everything RIGHT!, they've given up coffee, alcohol, smoke.... anything that may harm them......

That to me speaks more than 1000 words on how a real mother should be....
Now, coffee is not as bad as alcohol/drugs.... (note that).

With that said, yes, we've struggled, and like I said: therefore we have a VERY different perspective of pregnancy... and the miracle growing in our wombs... so now we cherish and are RESPONSIBLE enough to carry our miracle to term and beyond....

Call me mean, judgamental... and maybe you even feel 'shame on me'.... that's your opinion of things, my opinion still won't change, and i still feel agreeing on potentially harming a baby is just as stupid and selfish as a careless mother.

And, no, i won't get off 'this high horse'.... i won't ever see things 'lightly' after true suffering....

*better view from up here*

[Tennesseegirl]

wasnt just you vsent... I was upset befor i even seen your post...
she had a glass of wine!!! the judgment and put down wasnt called for in this case...Like I said.. she is scared and un sure of her actions... she said it herself... shes not doing it again.!!  so with that said... she was just looking for reasurance her baby will be fine.
and I felt she wasnt getting it and felt bad for her. too many post picking on her instead of helping...
actually... I would think the wine is even beter for her then the coffee... when it comes to science... lol

yea... I knew it was upsetting me and prob. should of just ignored it... lol but I just couldnt do it.. atleast  this day.... smile
sry.. If I came on to strong... It just got the best of me... hey... I like you too....nothing personal...
actually elizebeth250 pretty much said what I fill... just in a more proper style... smile...
lol... she must be having a good day...

[melimeli]

wow I wont even drink a pepsi or an take an advil for a headache that lasts 4 days.. just think I couldn't live with the guilt if something did happen thinking it was my fault for the rest of my life...  Nine months is a very short time to give up some things for the health of our babies...  good luck, be strong and resist temptation it'll be worth it in the end...

tennessee:  since when have we waited for people to ask for advice before we started giving it? haha

[vsentz]

Well hun, with that said.... i really hope your day improves!!! ;))

I know, we are all hormonal.... and the thing that irritates me the most is a careless woman towards their own unborn child.... why? like i said: maybe because I hated my body so bad every month,.... month after month.... for failing on me and my tiny angel. I was giving up my own 'normal' life just to be able to 'feel pregnant' again.... and there they were... women out in the street smoking with a big belly.... or pregnant women 'b.tching' about pregnancy and hating it... while i would have given my soul to carry a child to term, or to at least feel a kick of my precious angel....
I don't feel any consideration for these women. 0. In fact, i get angry... and I question myself how would they act if they had a tragedy happen to them after doing these kinds of things?? would it change their point of view too????? would they now really fight and sacrifice a stupid glass of wine (or 3!) for this gift from heavens?????? most likely....

So, if posting this in a public forum, she just expected someone magically knew, and had said: 'oh your baby will be fine....' (which is what she really wanted to hear) then it would have been BULL SH**...., in a public forum, posts like these only raise polemic discussion and people WILL not only give advise but will try to help the lady snapping her back into reality from the stupidity she's commiting!

Now, if she's really so concerned about this... she should go straight to the doctor! not a forum!... and I am glad to at least read she'll quit her adiction (addiction). Some common sense after all...

[Tennesseegirl]

other than beating myself up... with actions...
I have always tried to give advice when asked?..lol You mean weather they liked the answer or not???? now that  diffrent story... heeee heee

what really got me the most... was
when you ask for advice... you want to hear form those who have been there done that and are looking for relief... and if someone in my case.. 20 years younger comes on and preaches to me without the suport Im wanting...and scold with their 2cents? lol... uummmumm ummm... I mean come on.. back when I had my dd.. they said a glass of wine is good for them.. we are in such a damn if you do dam if you dont.. situation.

lol.. now you dont see me going on here and asking what do u guy think about me having a cup of coffee either now do you? lol hey... Im not stupid... I will do what I think is best for my body and child and leave it at that.  she didnt break any law...nor a sin I might add... lol

[vsentz]

no, she didn't....
girl, but it's not about breaking a law.... it's about common sense....
now 20 years ago, a glass of wine wasn't seen as bad.... also 20 years ago, polio was still considered a deathly desease.... times change, so do science and their discoveries... and thank GOD we evolve.... and with that, we shoud go along....
Imagine if i'd go with what my gramma used to say?! instead of my doc's advise?????
she used to tell my mom not to let our dog look at me while i was eating becasue he would get all the protein and strip my steak from it... (yeah.... with the sight....)....

Anyway, this is a matter of opinions, and as much respected when they don't coinside.... don't you think? ;) as long as innocent lifes are not put in jeopardy, that is.

About age... i've seen (in this forum.. and out) women close to 40... and the maturity of a teenager....
I've known women that just turn into 'drinking age' and are more mature than freaking OPRAH!.... age doesn't matter when it comes to maturity... brains do.

If she takes it as me preaching... oh well... she'll put the words in her ears that she wants to hear, and the ones she doesn't, then she'll most likely discard them.....

I hope in the long run tho, i helped someone open their eyes to reality (good or bad), this little Mexican has some experience too... ;)

[jifnif]

This is a personal preference.  One of responsibility in my opinion.  My dr told me that I could have a glass of wine a month.  I choose not to.  Even though they said it was ok, they cannot guarantee that it will not harm the baby.  They are not God.  I do take a sip of my husband's beer when he has an occasional one.  But honestly, like a previous poster said I can't even take tylenol or have caffeine.  I have lost a lot of pregnancies and would never jeopardize anything on purpose.  I don't even exercise above a walk so I don't lose this lil one.  Now, what is done is done.  If it were me, I would be doing a lot of praying ( and I am not very religious) and begging for forgiveness.  And most of all, take care of yourself from here on out.  If you have a problem, get help.  Keep positive thoughts.  :)

[poupoune26]

Ok, I have mixed feelings about this subject..so here goes nothing..  I think these days, people exagerate as to what could or will harm our babies, either in the womb or after birth.  I think we are overdoing everything.  I mean, no caffeine, no alcohol, no cold medicine (I mean that's just torture when you're sick!), no smoking, no nothing!!!  I do agree with the no drugs thingie (hard drugs) and the no drinking..but to a limit.

I really don't think that a glass of wine once in awhile will affect our baby!  And there are no studies that shows anything conclusive on the subject.  They do NOT know how much alcohol, if any, could harm a foetus.  Then, it remains a personal choice for everyone. I sure wouldn't go out and get drunk, what's not good for the mother sure wouldn't be good for the baby, that's just good sense! But a glass of wine, I'm sure, is ok.  I mean in Europe, women drink a glass of wine a day even while pregnant!!

Let's think back when our mothers were pregnant with us...they smoked cigarettes throughout the whole pregnancy (most of them did anyways), I'm sure they had a bit to drink as well..and god knows what else!  We are all here and doing just fine.  If we shield our children from every little dangers in life, it will make them weak and they'll get sick with anything later in life!  

Anyways, those are my opinions on the subject..take 'em or leave 'em!!  lol  

Love you all!
Melanie  27w5d

[VitaminC]

Elizabeth250 said it better than I could. Some people see alcohol as the ultimate evil, while forgetting that eating too much junk food, skipping breakfast, and eating red meat and high in mercury fish. I have a friend who drank 3 sodas while pregnant. In my oponion, that's much worse than wine.

[vsentz]

hehehe... speaking of maturity....

-and you had to put your little stick in didn't you?.....
remember you got reprimended by MedHelp once.... next time... well, you know what happens.... ;)

Like I said before, each one has the right of an opinion, and good or bad, respectable.... as of mine, this doesn't coincide with mine. Good for the ones that do! thank goodness every human being in this world is different and worthy of an opinion. We are also responsible of our own actions....

[melimeli]

I think it is always better to error on the side of precaution when dealing with the life of another...  no one can tell us what will happen to our particular baby if we do something on a certain day so it is just best not to.  I don't know we all say look what our mothers did but... how many babies were born and did not live up to their potential because of it... we cannot see the affect alcohol has on brain development from outside appearances and maybe it is just slight... not anything catastrophic but just maybe their brain would have been a little better off if you didn't take that drink.. now I am not saying your baby will be born with 16 toes or without a head... but I do think it affects the manner in which the brain develops.. I had a friend in high school that got pg and drank a lot.. I mean until passed out on the toilet drunk and you know what her baby was beautiful... a beautiful baby boy... but as he grew, well he has ADD (was it caused by the alcohol) well she will never know but only can feel guilt because she doesn't know... also he doesn't do too hot in school... the alcohol???  who knows but let me tell you she lives each day with the guilt of it being her fault...  so why risk it?  why put that weight on your shoulders... I strap my dd's into their carseats everyday even though one in 6 and I think god we never used car seats and we were fine... I mean 6 come on... but if just if we got in a wreck and something happened to her and she wasn't in a car seat... well why risk it?  I would never be able to live with myself...  it is better not to temp fate and just be a healthy as possible for the short 9 months we hold a little angel in our bellies..  

[vsentz]

Well, girlfriend, I certainly applaud your VERY wise point of view.

Oh, no one could have said it better....

Thank yoU! =)

[melimeli]

thanks vane... haha..

[pcarsey]

I doubt that you have done anything to your baby.. but truth be told, and in probably as much bluntness, who knows???

The only thing I ask is.. are these same mothers going to hand their baby a cigarette or a glass of wine or a can of beer when they give birth to it? what's the difference? Common Sense,... there is only 9 months in a pregnancy.. some might say 10.. but 10 freaking months at the most?????????? COME ON..... WHO IS MORE IMPORTANT TO YOU?? YOU OR THE BABY? Who is to say that you have a really bad day at work, at the grocery store, with the family.. whatever and drink.. what if that one drink actually DID do something to the baby? Have you all ever heard of the man who drank ONE beer and drove his pregnant wife and 5 kids home from the hospital? He hit a utility truck head on and it killed the mother and baby...... BECAUSE HE HAD ONE BEER!!! They tested his blood alcohol level and it came back high.. but he swears he only had ONE! Now this mother and baby was taking away from 5 other children.. and their dad is going to prison. What's fair about that? Where is the common sense in any of that?

IMHO if you cannot find non-alcoholic drinks for 10 months.. and choose to drink the ones that do have alcohol *just because it isn't a problem and you are making sure you only drink a certain amount*... then I do feel sorry for you, to me.. and to me only.. doesn't mean I hate any of you who choose to drink, smoke, whatever.. but to ME I would take that as some kind of selfish reasoning. There is a presious baby growing inside of you.. hell.. they say even immunizations can cause Autism, or other health problems.. why anyone would want to drink a beer because there is NO ACTUAL PROOF.. is totally beyond me!!.. But,, hey.. it's you... and who am I to judge.. which I didn't *judge* I just gave my opinion =o)

IT'S BEAUTIFUL IN OHIO TODAY...... YAYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!


And.. I will also have to add this too..

[pcarsey]

I really appreciate everyones opinions in things like this.. sometimes it can help people see a different view then they had before.. and vice versa.. but please try to keep it nice ladies.. =o)

[AndiJ78]

No one knows how much alcohol will damage your baby, it could be a a glass of wine, could be more. Genetics have a lot to do with it and the effects are often not seen for 10+ years.

I have a friend who thought an occasional drink would be fine and now both of her boys are left with the end result of FAE/FAS. Behavioral problems, developmental delays, physical abnormalities, etc. She claims the occasional glass of wine here and there. Didn't take much to change the course of her children's lives forever.

Google FAS and then start really thinking about those who are likely effected. Start looking at babies and children around you, start looking at populations that are notorious for drinking, see if you pick out some striking similarities between the effects of alcohol and those who are a product of such.

It seems like such as simple thing...don't drink.

[pcarsey]

Oh..... you know.. I just thought of one more thing.. if alcohol DOESN'T have an effect on a fetus or a baby.. then why do they suggest that when you are breastfeeding you should limit your alcohol and you should wait 2 hours PER drink before you breastfeed again?? ....

Just something I thought of while peeing.... =o)

[cpatow]

now I'm not going to say what I condone or don't condone...everyone has well beat that poor horse to a bloody pulp...but I WILL say that JUST TODAY my regular OB (not my high risk OB) and I were talking about life and pregnancy and how things change over the years. He said that in his country (he's not American but has been practicing here for 20 years) it is CUSTOMARY and ALLOWABLE for a woman to have one glass of wine every week or two weeks. He says, as with anything else, it is what is done in excess that matters.

This got me to thinking about all of our other "things". If we feel so firmly, passionately and almost judgmentally about this issue I think we also need to wrap some context around it.

If we are concerned about every thing that can possible have a cause / effect relationship on an unborn child then we also have to be equally firm, passionate & judgmental with the women who:
1. Eat too much sugar (and you'd be surprised how much is too much)
2. Drink ANYTHING with caffeine (and nearly all sources say small amounts are okay but they're not sure how much. This also includes EATING anything with caffeine, such as chocolate
3. Listen to music that is too loud
4. Go outside on a heavily polluted day
5. Use artificial sweeteners of any kind in anything
6. Don't take their vitamins, even if their morning sickness or weak stomachs can't tolerate it
7. Take ANY medications for ANY reason, whether truly needed or just because that darn headache/toothache/stomache won't go away
8. Don't exercise enough
9. Exercise too much
10. Sleep not enough
11. Sleep too much
12. Eat beef that *could have* come from a downed cow and, hence, cause any multitude of diseases
13. Eat fish that might have slightly too much of anything in it
13. Eat chicken that might have salmonella or eColi
14. Eat fruits & veggies that have not been thoroughly washed everytime


The list could go on and on. My point is just simply that in society today there are too many factors out of our control and while choosing to take a glass of wine is one that IS in our control there are also many in this world that think that the glass of wine is not a big deal.

Did you know that in Denmark they think it is harmful to sit a newborn or infant "up" in carseats and strollers until a certain age? Their strollers and carseats have "baskets" instead and the baby is laid in a basket that is then "netted" in the back seat. Are we harming our children by having them sit upright? If you ask a Dane, we are!! (My best friend is a Dane).

Every day on the news there is a different food or toy recall. Heck, pretty soon just BREATHING is going to cause an issue.

There's a saying that goes something like this: before pointing out the spec in a friend's eye, pull the plank out of your own. Now, I'm certainly one to err on this and have done so on this board myself, but for those that feel ultra-passionate about the topic, first look at your own life and habits and such and question whether there is anything you might ALSO do to keep your baby healthy. Sometimes we all can become crazily obsessed on this topic because we want so much for our unborn children to have the best shot, and if that means being hypervigilent with our own lives sobeit, but we shouldn't expect that everyone else will do the same.

Again, not saying I condone anything but just trying to point out another side of the argument.

Christina

[vsentz]

yep, and that's why we are leaving it out on the: *take our opinion or leave it*.... bad or good?? maybe, maybe not..... why risk it?... hmmmmm better not risk it.... ;)

*pulls out a Cuervo*

...tequila anyone???

[melimeli]

Vane...

ummmm I think they should take my opinion... cause it is well known that I know everything ;) haha

[pcarsey]

Vanessa... IF only I WASN"T pregnant.. and HAD a gallbladder.. ahahaha.. tequilla *used to be* my favorite!! But I haven't had a gallbladder since 04 and haven't drank since then either..

[vsentz]

Meli.... LOL! of course!!!! ;) uhhh... wait... what were we talking about??? *hiccup*.... i don't know if it's the tequila or pregnancy hormones now!


Patty... oh man! i hear ya!! a nice chilli margarita.... yum!... but then again... i can just be happy with a virgin pina colada from redlobster! YUM!!! =))
did you ever pass those things??? my FIL had a couple of stones passed and he swears that he knows labor pains being a man.... LOL!

[pcarsey]

Nope never passed them at all, they had to cut me open 4 inches across my stomach and take the whole thing out. One was the size of a golf ball. Man I am so glad I do not have to deal with that pain ever again! I believe your FIL knows what it feels like too!

Doesn't really bother me about not being able to drink, since I never have really anyways.. cept when DH and I got married.. Kiona wine.. YUUUmmmMMY!! and I am NOT a wine drinker..

[vsentz]

OMG!! the size of a golf ball!!!! i bet that'd hurt!.... when i first came to the US... i was 'dating' dh and didn't wanna live with him yet... (not that it's bad... i just didn't feel i knew him enough!) so i was living with his cousin and wife... she had those things! and well, i was still learning english terms... so, my now SIL calls and asks for Crystal (they had to rush her to the hospital that night since she was passing out of pain!) and i told her.. 'well, she was just taken to the hospital since she's got these nasty balls that got stuck in her keester'....

a silence in the phone was never scarier to me... and then she played dumb and told me 'oh...... ok... well, please tell her i called just to see how she was doing...'

LOL

i got just a liiiiittle bit mixed up between kidneys and keesters....... not too similar tho....

hehehe, to this day, they all pick on me about it.....


I wasn't a drinker either.... just the ocassional pina colada...(hmm with amaretto!)... Im not a big fan of wine either.... just the bubbly, fruity one... but I have to try that one!!

now, back in my party days.... well, that's another story! lol
;)

[40smama]

Oh, v, you crazy thing!!!  I'm having an imaginary strawberry daquiri as we speak - LOL!  Btw, thanks for your pm, you're the best - jen

[Tennesseegirl]

ok.. last word for me... I promise...about this subject... smile

It is not proven a glass of wine will harm the baby... Old school  and New..
now it is excessive amounts will and they just havent come to a size amount yet. ie depending on weight per person etc...so with that said.. they say just dont do it to be safe. which is fine...
I would think this topic is politics for the prego... there is no wrong post .. there is just a mean post. whats the football saying?... mean man mean!!!
Now to say this lady is bad for doing so? to say she is a poor mother? to say she has a drinking problem? to say shes not responsible?  come on...



ps... Patty.. They told me to have a drink when I breast fed... Just so I could relax enough to let the milk go for my dd. alot of wemon need to learn how to relax while breast feeding and that really did help me flow.. now I dont think I will need it this time because I know now..... eeeeek I think.. but if I have a problem? I will do just that. alot of people will give up befor they learn... I thank that dr today for saying that to me because it really did do wonders for me.and I stoped when he called her a pig and me a cow... smile

beer and wine will do lots of good things for your system too... but I wont go there..I guess the bottom line is there are many people who abuse the situation and mess it up for the inocents..
Im glad I was out shopping for my most healty daughter..and missed all this.. lol dont think I could of handled it. Just way too hormanal for first thing in the morning. and to still go thur till now? I would of really been wrapped in and missed my beautiful outfits...

yall... be nice...heee heee you talk about making a mountian out of a mole hill... geez.. v you should be a lawyer!! You throw one hell of an argument. although I still say im right.. ha ha ha.... giggle giggle

[Tennesseegirl]

aaaw... thanks 38yearold... gotta luv it here!!
I think we all are going to have wonderful children!!! we all are tying eveything we can to make this 9 months as easy as possible... and learning to be the perfet parent at that...!!thank you..

[vsentz]

hehehehe no lawyer girlfriend, I'd literaly stand up and smack or b*tch slap the criminal even when i'd be defending him/her! lol!!!!
I'm just hot blooded..... =S LOL

Like i said girl, everyone has their own opinion about these sort of things, and yeah yeah yeah,.... you're always right.... same as Meli......

=P

I still won't change my opinion for the world and would still think what i think about doing alcohol (excesively or not so much) and/or drugs during pregnancy. Believe girl, before, i used to think 'oh, no big deal'.... but after you've lost something so precious (like in every aspect of life) you learn how to cherish it with your life and bones! ;)

OK... so, is your day getting better for ma' girl down in Tennessee??? I surely hope so! it's getting warm and nice up here in PA! =) altho, i couldn't resist and took a looooong nap last night after getting back from work! i was gonna do some work at home (i need to finish a website for a customer!) but i was just way to hungry and way too tired! didn't wake up till 10pm!!! and then i went to bed... lol

I'm getting ready to start my new job! yay! so im really excited about that! they'll let me telecommute after 6 months (once Maddie is here and ready to go!) so i can work from home a couple days a week and be with my princess! isn't that great??

Ok.... so, didn't we have a party here??? where's the damn rum ladies!!! so many hormones going on..... and no drinkies?? c'mon! ;) wink wink

[vsentz]

Jenny, you know, it's funny how everytime you PM me with something in your heart or mind, i am going thru the same???! girl, anytime! =)
BTW, can you PM me your cell phone number again!?!?!?! lol.... i don't know if i have the correct one anymore! (just in case we have some news before we think we will! ya know? ;))

Love ya LOTS!!!
XOXOXO

[pcarsey]

I'm with you, I'm stickin to how I believe too, but yanno, no one knows for sure what causes what and I'm no scientist so who cares, I choose NOT to do it, and tha's all I can worry about anyways right? No worries on my part!

NOW... Am I allowed to have a Vanilla Latte?.. that's about as much as I can handle anyways =o).. skim milk please.. no foam.. whip cream instead =o)

[elizabeth250]

I just read all of the pros and cons that people put out there.  It reminds me of the movie FOOTLOOSE when all of the parents were throwing the books into the fire because of what they had heard or believed to be bad.  They didn't research it themselves and went on what other people said.  This is the samething here.  These are all opinions.  I think your body will tell you what is enough, and that is what stressymum  felt. ie. headache...Anyway ladies, please be a little softer with your judgments.  After all, when you are pointing one finger out in judgment, 4 are pointing back at you!

[vsentz]

Patty! hehehe, how about some cinnamon!?! man! i could drink a nice white chocolate/mango latte from Gloria Jeans..... hmmmm!!! have you ever tried those??? i miss them so much! instead, i just indulge on some plain ole' krispykremes every once in a day... lol... oh did i say a day?? no, no.... i meant... hour.... ;)

Yeah, i think stressymum is long gone.... either to see the doctor, or to the bar?... ;) (nothing but some smokey humor thrown in here.....)

ok ok! i'll shut up now! but like Patty said: each one has their own opinions and yep, elizabeth you're right, we are just throwing all kinds of info, scolding, understanding, blah blah blah, she'll take what she wants to, and leave what she doesn't... hopefully, wrong or right, bad or good, judgamental or not... and even harsh or not... she'll take the best and act by what's best FIRST for her child,.... and then for her... like all of us mothers should. ;)


......you're still right Tennesseegirl and Meli........ ;P

[pcarsey]

Vanessa- I haven't tried one, and forget the cinnamon, I'm allergic! EEK! Oh I so wish I wasn't because I used to LOVEEEEE cinna-buns! Then I got pregnant with my daughter some 18 years ago =o) Pregnancy does all sorts of crazy things to our systems, don't you agree.. like.. I used to never think about how much coffee I drank, now it has to be decaf.. and MUST be organic. Don't need any more chemicals in things I eat as it is.  But yanno, that's me. Wanting this baby to be as healthy as can be so I only consume organic food and am very picky about what I eat. .. ... Although some good chocolate does sound good... maybe sprinkle some cocoa on top of my Latte instead of cinnamon??

Yes I agree.. Hail to Miss Tennesseegirl and Meli!! ;oP

[melimeli]

ooohhh I like where this is headed!  finally I have brainwashed some people into believing I am always right haha!!!

[pcarsey]

hehehehe we are under your spell... may it never be broken.. who need alcohol.. we are drunk on your superiority! ;o/

[40smama]

Of course I'll give you my cell phone number- when I can find the da#@ thing!!  I can't find it anywhere - omg - wtf???   I'll pm you w/the number anyway - who knows - maybe that'll help me find it.  I hate the pregnancy brain fog!!   How are ya doing today???

[cpatow]

No you guys!!! It's not you that's always right, it's ME!!!!! It's always me and no one else. ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME ME and only ME.

....just ask my husband
:0)
Christina

[vsentz]

Patty- HMMMMM! cinna-buns!
are you serious???? wow!!!!!!!! man! maybe some chocolate will do then! oh i am SO with you! i won't drink coke, or iced tea! (love raspberry lipton ice tea!!!), i eat all organic, bunch of veggies! i wash my fruits! (didn't give two of those before...) i even drive more carefully!!! lol ;) i don't know, im just more in tune with myself, my kiddo in here and the environment! ya know, im even funny about loud noises now... like when dh starts hammering (redoing her room) i step away immediately! or i won't play loud music... or try not to let the shower hit too hard in my belly! lol hell! we all want the best for our kids!... i think i'm gonna mega protect this poor baby.... ;) and not to mention spoil her rotten! (plus she squirms around when she hears something loud... or doesn't like how im laying)
I have a friend that got preggers at 18.... she had the curliest and most beautiful hair ever! brown with golden and reddish highlights (yep, natural) .... and when she was about to burst, and right after she had Fersi, she got STRAIGHT as a ruler-hair.... and turned almost black!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =S she cried and cried for her hair.....! needless to say, the little girl came out BLONDE and curly gorgeous locks! hehehehe
then she got her hair sort of back.. but it's still not like it used to... man! well, the be*tch got her tiny waist back in no time, while i gained weight along with her (no daddy around) and didn't lose it with a simple push like her!!! lol =))

Meli... i think your dh (like the rest of ours) might think, or, for his own sake, at least act like you're always right too! ;) and as a good latino, he'll sweet talk you into his ways!.... no better way to make a woman feel FIIIIINE!!! and still getting his way.... hehehe

[pcarsey]

Ahh yes, I know what you mean, how bout.. the water not being TOO hot. I LOVE hot showers, but anymore my water stays on the lowest temp. We have a Takagi water heater so we can set the temp when we want. My son loves r&b, rap, and DH has now gotten him into playing the drums, ugh! If they aren't at a set of drums they play on the wall (thank god it's stucco) , table, floor (thank god it's concrete) in the car.. I always say I don't want Brayden coming out banding his head when he is born so please knock it off! Always with a smile you know ;o) I am more conscious about absolutely everything trying to secure the health and well being of my baby, without being too over-bearing. I just think at my age is doesn't hurt to be more aware. And just a little protective of this pregnancy. Who am I hurting right?

The hair deal, you know, both my ex husband and I both have brown hair, both with a natural curve, and BOTH my kids came out with WHITE hair straighter then a poker! Don't know what happened there, then when my daughter was 1 all a sudden there was curls all over her head, and now it's back to being straight.

[jbrooks39]

i have natural curly hair and all 3 of my kids have perfectly straight hair.they always say they want my hair and i want theirs.i hate have curly hair.i want it straight but DH loves my hair.

[pcarsey]

I have natural wave hair, not curly not straight, that's why I keep it short, well that reason and it just won't grow! It doesn't like to do anything! UGH!

[vsentz]

hehehe i hear ya with the crazy curls! my hair fell off a lot when i was put on Lupron... and it's growing back so now i have like all these layers and the tiny hairs fly all over the place! lol
my scalp has also gotten so oily!!! (and my Tzone) i swear i could fry an egg on it! =( yuck!

We'll see how Maddie comes out... dh has angel like curls! beautiful hair... blond bouncy ones... and my hair is black... i hope she gets her daddy's and also his eyes!.... i just know she's gonna get the mexican gene big time! =P so when daddy takes her to school the're gonna question who that guy is! lol

[melimeli]

my ex had great curly hair and mine is stick straight... my kids both have stick straight hair like mine... ex had black hair kids have dark brown.. my eyes are green ex were almost black.. my youngest dd has blue eyes for a year.. they were so pretty but they turned light brown after that...  they are both almost white as my ex was very light skinned...

now with my dh that I have now who knows.. his hair is wavy.. brown eyes.. well you have seen how handsome he is haha... we will see how parisa turns out...


ummm what was the topic of this forum again haha

[vsentz]

40smama- Jenneeeeyyyy! (moking forrest gump accent) thanks for the PM girlie!!! hehehe and thank you for your words sweetie, you always make me feel so special!!.....how can I not love you!? =)))

cpatow- ooooooooook......aaaaaaaaaaalright..... one more added to the 'im SOOO right' club..... YOU'RE right girlfriend! the hell with everything else! ;P
dh always says: 'im unhappy... who the hell cares, my wife is unhappy..... we are ALL unhappy....'

lol ;)
isn't that the way it works?