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Baby at 38 - too old???
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Baby at 38 - too old???

I am 37 yrs old and have two healthy boys age 6 & 4.  I have been wanting to have 1 more baby but hesitated because of financial and obligations concern.  I went to my doctor in July 2010 for the yearly check up and bring up the possibility on trying to become pregnant next year.  Wow....she immediately brought up all the concerns on "OLD AGE" pregnancy - higher risks on down syndrome, miscarriage....etc.  She even said that if in the case that the 3rd baby has some medical issues, that would change the dynamic between me and the boys!!! I was kinda discouraged as I didn't really thought that 38 was that old - well, before I walked in the doc's office anyway.  Has anyone have similar experiences?  How big of a risk really of having baby at this age?  Feel big difference during the pregnancy between a younger and older age?  Any suggestions would help!  Thanks!!

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667829_tn?1297981723
I had a baby - conceived at 39, no genetic anomolies
My girlfriend had her first baby at 38, second at 39, no genetic anomolies.......

Good Luck,
Joanne
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1454495_tn?1290236496
I got that from my doc to, she goes why do you want to go and do that at your age. I am 41, 42 in Feb. I have 4 kids 22, 21, 17 and 9. I have had 2 cycles since I have had my IUD out, first cycle I had a miscarriage, and I think I maybe pregnant now.
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1278093_tn?1294323984
i am pregnant with my first at 36 and we want 1-2 more....
you do have to think more about chromosomal issues, but otherwise it's been an uneventful pregnancy
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1068361_tn?1290631759
I just had my first at 39. Healthy baby boy! I did have pih during pregnancy, was monitored closely and induced at 38 weeks! Good Luck!
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1473300_tn?1397592129
I was concerned at my last appointment about letting my doctor know that I am trying to get pregnant at 37 because I was afraid she would be negative about it. She was actually really encouraging. I was very happy she felt that way. I am sorry your doctor is so negative.
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1169162_tn?1331235953
I just had my first baby at age 40 (pregnant at 39).  He is 10 weeks old and so far is the picture of health.  My pregnancy was also uneventful, and my doctor was very supportive.  38 is not too old even in the slightest - there is an increased risk of genetic abnormalities, but even with that risk , the genetic counselor explained to me that there is 98% chance at age 39 of having a healthy baby.  There also is an increased risk for pregnancy  complications such as gestational diabetes and pre-eclampsia, but again not likely and so, so many of us (here on the forum and beyond) have had normal pregnancies and health pregnancy at your age and older.  Unless you really are attached to your doctor, you might want to think about switching to a more supportive doctor.  Good luck.
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Avatar_f_tn
I'm 41 and 32 weeks pg my other child os 7. My doctor mentions my age a lot but that's about all. I did not have any special testing except level 2 ultrasound.  I even have high blood pressure when I'm not pregnant but it has been great with no meds!! My ONLY problem with this pregnancy is severe fatigue, which I don't think is a true health issue. I say go for it!!
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Avatar_f_tn
I am suprised your doc said 38 is old... sheesh I am 38 and TTC, I am ready now more than ever and  in the best health ever, and not afraid anymore. My RE and gyn had no concerns at all. I know lots of people who had kids in their late 30s, friends from high school, sister, etc, very uneventful pregnancies and all babies were healthy. There is always a chance of DS and other abnormalties but all in all, the chances are greater of having a healthy baby. Good luck!\
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Avatar_f_tn
Maybe it depends where you live.  38 is not too old at all where I live to have a baby.  I had my first at 40 (pregnant at 39) - no issues.  The only thing my doctor recommended differently because of my age was to do a CVS.  I felt amazing my whole pregnancy - full of energy except well, for the first trimester - and had an easy vaginal delivery.  Of course, I don't know how to compare it since I'd never had a baby at a younger age!

If you really want a baby, I'd say definitely go for it!  And maybe switch doctors!  Sheesh, I think it's interesting your doctor said anything like that...
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611020_tn?1290575229
My sister had a baby at 40 or 41....the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. Don't think it's too old. And I've known 25 year olds having DS babies..so you can't always follow statistics. There's always the one person who gets the short end of the stick.....(be it good or bad)
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Avatar_f_tn
I am 38 & still trying to conceive my first after 2yrs.  

I say if you want a 3rd GO FOR IT!!!!!!!!!!
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1505610_tn?1289835425
Thank you for all your advice. I'm definitely going to search around to see if there are docs around who are more supportive. I agree that I have several friends who just had their 1st baby and they are my age. I'm pretty healthy and active and I feel good about it. Do you gals have natural birth with this baby?

I'm not going to try probably until the summer of next year. Will see if I can get pregnant as easy as the first two times. That's another concern........

Thanks!
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Avatar_f_tn
I had my youngest at 39 and we are ttc another now. I am 42 but really healthy so I have no fears. It is taking a while longer to concieve (conceive) than I had hoped, but time will tell. My ob for my last one never mentioned my age. I would definitly try to find a more supportive doctor. They are out there it might just take a while to find the right one.
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1496527_tn?1289078039
I'm 38 and expecting our first baby! I'll be 39 when I give birth. Though I'm considered to be "advanced maternal age", the nurse said I wasn't too old at all. :)
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1066572_tn?1296243601
Obviously a hot topic given the number of responses.

I'm 43 and pregnant with my first child (31 weeks).  

So far all is going well and will try for another about 6 months after he is born.  Yes, there is an added risk of genetic abnormalities - at my age, the risk for DS is 1:35.  That means a 97% chance of having a healthy baby.  

Realistically I feel like I am in my early thirties, am very healthy, stay active and eat right.

Your risk for DS at age 38 is 1:177, or a 99% chance you will have a healthy baby.
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377493_tn?1356505749
My son was born one week before I turned 41.  I am currently pregnant with my second, and this one will be born at 42.  My son is healthy and completely normal...in fact meeting his milestones ahead of time.

I personally have not had a lot of negativity.  My OB had her children in her 40's as well, and my family Dr.'s wife had their last in her mid 40's.  If I were you, I might think of switching Dr's.  When to have a baby is a very very personal decision, and unless you have a medical condition that would make it a problem, there is nothing wrong with having a child at 38, and it's none of her business.

Yes, our risks are slightly higher, and increase with age.  But I have been around this forum a long time now, and the vast majority of the children born in the time I've been here have been just fine.

Good luck to you!!
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1505610_tn?1289835425
You all gave me lots of positive vibe on this issue. Thank you all for that. I don't know if anybody feels that way but sometimes you just have this great feeling on preceding something, though it might be difficult but you just know it's the right thing to do?

I'm going to use these next couple months to made up my final decision. I'm so glad to gain support in this forum, people at my work place are very career minded or young professional with very few who have children. They'll think that I'm cracy in wanting more kids.

On a side note, anyone has to pursuade their husband for having another child? :)



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Avatar_f_tn
I'm so glad you found answers and support on here and good luck making your decision.

To answer your last side note q, my husband actually WANTS a third child regardless of our age. I would love to have a third one too but I will be 42, almost 43, when this one is born, so I will be calling it quits then. I am jealous you are 38 and get to have another child!!! ( and still be kind of young:).   Take care.
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231441_tn?1333896366
Hi,

your doctor is ageist.  Find another. :)

I had my first baby at 38.  I had lots of medical issues.  But she is perfect.  My doctors were never anything but encouraging.

I am trying for my second at 40.  My doctors are concerned about my other medical issues, but have never brought up the age as an issue (except as a reason why we're having trouble getting pregnant).... but they are totally supportive and have never even hinted I shouldn't be trying! :)

I have a friend who is 45 and trying for her 4th now.  Age is only a number and as long as you're ovulating you have prospects to have a healthy child.


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1505610_tn?1289835425
@ Everybody!!!  Thanks for the support!  I would love to thank you all individually but cannot quite get to every single one, but THANK YOU!!!  and glad to hear an overwhelming POSITIVE note on this topic.   I have not thought on changing my doctor before I got on this forum, I had my previous two with this office, had good experiences with them but never feel very personal with any of the doctors.  It's a group practice and I always end up seeing the Practitioner anyway.  I am definitely going to "shop" around and get the feel of different doctors.  

Picking you guys brains again - what kind of prenatal testing are recommended for ages over 35, and what is really necessary??

@Allip77 - Good luck on your second one!  

@Kathy421 - thanks for all the statistics, always great to have numbers to support the theory and to throw it into my doc's face....

@Nola0805 - thanks for the comments too!  

@mama2fivekids - good luck!!




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377493_tn?1356505749
There isn't actually a whole lot of extra testing for those of us of "advanced maternal age" (don't you hate that title?  I do..lol).  At the end of first trimester, they will do a test involving both bloodwork and ultrasound (here it's called first trimester screen, but I have heard it referred to as other names as well).  In the ultrasound they are measuring the nucheal fold at the back of the neck. The bloodwork is looking for a ratio between certain hormones.  They will compile that info and give you your "odds' for having a baby with either trisonomy 13, 18 or 21.  In my case I came back with odds of 1:13 that my baby would have Downs Sydndrome.  The important thing to remember about this test is that it is not diagnostic, it is simply to help you determine whether further testing is recommended.  In my case I opted for Amnio, which is 99% accurate in detecting chromosonal abnormalities.

Some women choose to forgo this and have CVS, which is also very accurate in detecting a chromosonal abnormality, but is done earlier (I believe around 12 or 13 weeks.  Amnio is done around 16 weeks).  Both CVS and Amnio to have a slight risk of miscarriage associated, so it's important to do your homework and know if you are comfortable with that risk.  

In my case the Amnio results showed my son did not have DS and was typical.

Other then that, I can't think of any tests that are different.  You have your glucose test for gestational diabetes, anatomy scan at 20 weeks, but I think those are the same no matter what age you are.

It's really not that much higher of a risk.  Don't let negativity frighten you...if you want another baby, go for it, and good luck!!!
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1505610_tn?1289835425
Great info!!!  Good luck on your upcoming baby #2 and hope I will have a definitely answer within the next couple months and have good news too!!  Really...!!?? that's how they called us:  "advanced maternal age" ??? What an ungracious name that is...... Lord, I never thought this day would come.....well,  at least none of my kid's friend thinks that I'm their grandmother!!!!!  LOL

Come on, 40s is the new 30s, right?  
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi,  having a kid "sometimes" is not about an age but what it really concerm me is your post when you say "  hesitated because of financial and obligations concern"...

You need to talk to your husband first and agreed and plan it. it your financial situation has change and you dont mind taking care of 2 youngers and a baby and then you have a chance.

I do understand the doctors when they ask you questions about your age and how they are concern when you are older than 35 because is called hi risk pregancy.


at first i felt insulted , I see all these hollywood artist like celine dion, madona,travoltas wife getting pregnant after 40 and i though.." oH they look like 20's  they look so young and having kids..I can do it too!

I have been trying since 39y/o and I did agreed with my DH to TTC until I was 42y/o ( no more than that!) and when i when to my doctor to get back on the anticonceptive pill...surprise!

Now  i just turned 42y/ and pregnant with my first child ( married for 6 years)
and all the meeting and appoinments and the genetic problems you can encounter really freak me out.

I didnt know anything about this, its my first pregnancy so can i know? i always though kids with genetic problems or down syndrome comes to the world because it runs in the family( ?)   I was very wrong!

I try to post some of my concerns about it and many people are younger so i went to other forums where mothers are different age and have kids with problems and started reading, many of them had good testing and hi numbers and they got a child with problems.
I think the amnio test is accurate in some genetic problems but not for others.

I advice/reccomend to all 35y/o + to get all the blood test and a genetic consulting meeting to understand a little bit better what is so called" hi risk pregnancy" before getting pregnant.

Good luck to everybody!




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Avatar_f_tn
I don't think it is considered a "high risk" pregnancy.  I asked my old OB/GYN when I was 39 and pregnant and my new OB/GYN now that I'm 42 and pregnant and BOTH doctors said it's not high risk.  It's what adgal says - you're advised to do more screening for chromosomal abnormalities but everything else is the same.  The only other thing that might be different is that they don't love you to go too much past your due date...I was 10 days past my due date when I had my dd but my doctor had said she wouldn't have wanted me to go more than 2 weeks past.  When I was a week or so overdue, she had me go in for stress tests to make sure the baby was fine still (but this could be the same as with younger women).
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1505610_tn?1289835425
I think it's true even to younger mom that the doctor doesn't like to see it past the due date too much or the baby could get too big or stressful inside.  I had my two that came couple days early than due date, which I was surprised on the 1st one as I thought he'd come late, for the 1st time anyway.  
How are you feeling lately?  Good, tired, full of energy......?
There was this lady at my Latin Jazz class last night, 7 months preg and dancing all her way!  

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377493_tn?1356505749
High risk pregnancy is a term typically used because of a preexisting medical condition, or a history of problems such as early labor in other pregnancies.  I am considered high risk because I have had several miscarriage.  

There is no doubt we are at a higher risk of genetic issues.  But in all honesty, the odds are still very good.  The sad thing is most babies with chromosonal abnormalities do miscarry.  Or at least a high percentage of them.  Typically in first trimester.  It is still very uncommon to have a baby born with a chromosonal abnormality.  Yes, it happens, but not as often as you might think.  I have a close friend here on MH who has a baby born with DS, and she will tell you she won the lottery.  Her little girl is absolutely beautiful, and doesn't seem to let much hold her back.  

We do have a higher risk of m/c, primarily due to older eggs.  But again, countless women have come through this forum over the years who whipped through their pregnancies no problem.  

If this is what you want to do, you are not very old...really your not.  As I said I will be 42 when this one is born and the only thing I am worried about is making it through first trimester.  (because I have a history of several losses).  Other then that...no real concerns. Good luck!!!
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Avatar_n_tn
I got pregnant at 38 with my 3rd one. I went to see a new doctor and sha said I'm irresponsible and she went on and on and on about unhealthy ubnormal child, me not having regular inurance (public aid card, because my husband lost his job for a while), and how we can have a child if we can't afford it (because we don't have regular health insurance). When I came come I coudn't stop crying...We had 2 healthy kids ages 14 and 9 at the time and waited to have 3rd one because we wanted to get stable financialy...finally decided to go ahead, because time dosn't wait...After a whole year we got pregnant and couldn't be happier...until I went to see that doctor...After few days I decided that I'm not goona to put up with this and found grat obgyn practice where every doctor treated me like a queen and made me and my unborn child feel so important. Now I have healthy beatiful baby daughter, my husband got new job with health insurance, and we're trying for nr 4!!! I just turned 40 and I got GREEN LIGHT from my obgyn! What a wonderful feeling to have the right friendly and caring doctors!!!
Good luck to you and find yourself new doctor
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377493_tn?1356505749
Congrats on your little girl, and shame on that Dr.  I am glad you found someone new to work with.  So many stories like this come up here, and I am always shocked.  My OB has always explained the risk factor, but never as a deterrent, more as an education tool.  And also to show me the odds are still very much in my favor.  I just don't understand.
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1505610_tn?1289835425
I can relate to what you've been through with that doctor.  I was talking to the physician assistant and she told me all the higher risks on 35+ pregnancy and she basically told me that 3 is not a good number to have!!!???  Instead she kept persuading me that I should get and IUD.  

Obviously having how many kids is a very personal decision, I do believe that people should be responsible for the well being of their kids - financially and physically.  To response to April162010 concern, I probably should have said we "delayed" instead of "hesitated" on having the 3rd one because we want to give the best possible resources to our kids.  Quality vs. quantity, I guess most people have that concern unless they are billionaires. I do think that the medical staff should outline all the possible risks and factors towards pregnancy for older women, or women who already have several kids, however, when they express their own believes in a negative tone, I do not see that as a fair opinion to help me see through the whole picture.  
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377493_tn?1356505749
You hit the nail on the head Jujubiyo.  Give us the accurate info we need, then allow us to make our own decisions.  Treat us like intelligent women.  
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1027304_tn?1333977006
I think your dr. is wack!!!!!!    I'm 43 and 17 weeks pregnant with a healthy little boy, confirmed by CVS testing.

When I told my dr. at 41 that i was going to try, she said.....I'm so excited for you, I can't wait to see you with a baby bump.    Not once did she mention the downside.      

38 is NOT old anymore when it comes to baby making, more and more of us "older women" are having beautiful babies.   I was even told by my pediatrition and my mother in law that "older women" are SOOOOO much better parents and have much better behaved and well rounded children.
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Avatar_f_tn
I got the same thing from 2 of the doctors i was seeing... 2.5 years ago I went to my old practice and the doctor kept saying over and over again... "Do you know what your are doing... it will be such a HIGH RISK pregnancy... your too old to get pregnant..." It was driving me nuts... the next time he said it ... I looked at him and asked him if he thought i was stupid and hadn't thought about what i was doing... and that if he said anything like again I was going to his supervisor!!!  It was the last time I saw him!!!

Then just a couple of months ago I went to another doctor and she was just as rude... I did leave there crying but when I got home i called the insurance company and told them what happened... They apologized for her and gave me the names of other female doctors that I could visit...

I found a practice that I really like from a referral from a friend... They give free pregnancy tests!!!

I think that doctors should have to have write ups like other professionals ... so we the patients could make better choices when choosing our medical professionals...
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1027304_tn?1333977006
forgot to mention that my mother in law is an elementary school teacher.    She'd definately know.
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Avatar_f_tn

To adgal:
"High risk pregnancy is a term typically used because of a preexisting medical condition, or a history of problems such as early labor in other pregnancies."

It will be good to know about it before getting pregnant , so i wont be so stress out today, reading your post make me realized that is true what you said" hi risk" should be in case of any problem you had encounter getting pregnant or while pregnant.
In my case I have been 99% healthy( 1% is the cold here and there) and  i have been terrorized  by people around like ..ohhh you need to go to a "hi risk pregnancy" doctor because of your age... it feels no right!...


TO;
Jujubiyo:

You are 38 y/o and still have a chance and if economy and time is not an issue and you both love to have more kids and then its geat..i wish you luck and happiness

You are right about it , they supposed to encourage us since we are pregnant already and wish us the best.



I am 42y/o today 15 weeks and since its my first one i have been through a lot and i dont want any woman to go through to all these fears and questions just because we are older than 35y/o

everything was going well until I had a doctor calling me from the trimester test' s clinic ( i didnt know who this doctor was) saying me numbers over the phone and scaring the life out of me. i right away came her to MH and post my numbers all scared and thanks to ecologic and adgal that explained me  that my chances are only 1% of having problems( tx girls!)

My main doctor called me the following day telling me that everything looks great!.. i dont even need amnio or anything, meanhwile the doctor from the test was pushing me for the amnio test... ( thats the difference of a good doctor and a not to good doctor)
to the point my main doctor has send me to a different clinic for my 20 weeks u/s_test( he didnt like the way they handle my case just because of my age)

I am praying to have a healthy baby because this is our first one and last one and we can afford only one.

Good luck to everyone
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1505610_tn?1289835425
Good luck on your pregnancy.  Sounds like everything is going well so far, all the best.

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1505610_tn?1289835425
Good luck on you too for your upcoming baby boy!  You got a great supportive doctor!  I really need to do a little more research on my doctor!!  I wonder if I could just make appointment to go talk to the doctor, do they still charge it as a visit?  I suppose.....
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1027304_tn?1333977006
Thank you so much, I did have a great fertility doctor.   You have the right to change to any doctor until you find one that works for you, however they probably will charge it as a visit.
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Avatar_f_tn
hi there.
i had my FIRST baby at age 38.. i think you should go for it.. if its something that you really want.. why not?
i'm 39 now, and wanting to have a 2nd.. i've had a rough go at it this time (2 losses in 4 months), but i have faith, and i will fight on..
Good Luck! :) please keep me posted! :)
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Avatar_f_tn
I had my fifth baby at 38. I will say that I was high risk, not because of age, but because of high blood pressure. Age itself is not high risk, but age can increase your chances of having a high risk pregnancy. Also, down sydrome does increase with age. But, my baby is perfectly healthy, thank the Lord. Good luck.
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Avatar_f_tn
Hi ladies, you can call me JC. I will be turning 38 come July. I have been thinking of another baby myself. My son just turned 3 today but I am afraid. I have been taking cymbalta and a mood stabilizer for a while now. Is it even a consideration for me to have another child? I was not on any of these drugs when I had my son at 34. Boy, do things change as time goes and we get older. Does anyone have positive feed back for me or realistic feed back, either one will work. I just want to make the right decision for me and my family.

Thank you all!
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1473300_tn?1397592129
JC-

Your age is definitely not a problem. I am 12 weeks pregnant with twins at age 39. You should ask your doctor about the medications you are on to make sure they are safe to take during pregnancy. Good luck with whatever you decide.
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Avatar_f_tn
38 is definitely not too old..I'm 37 with baby #3, my OB doc had her last child at 41.  The last thing you need is an insensitive doc while pregnant...in my opinion I would find a new doc
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Avatar_m_tn
hi renny my name is john ,am just wont know if my girl she can get pregnant cos am so scared cos of not haveing baby cos she is 38 and i 36.all am saying is do u think we can have baby just like athere ppl or there is same thing secrit to have a baby when u r to late
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Avatar_f_tn
I am turning 40 today and am 35 weeks with my second. It has been hard on me physically but I am diabetic. I don't remember having this hard of a time with my daughter 8 years ago but the end result is what we all wish for. I suggest that if you truly want one more, do it now before it gets any harder. I wish I had been with my current husband 5 years ago. Maybe things would be less uncomfortable. I hope that  you make a good decision for you and your family.
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Avatar_f_tn
I am 38 and pregnant with our first babe. So happy I waited for the right time and right man to have a baby. We got pregnant the first month we ttc. Life is not as predictible as expected for most of the people. Doctors have personal opinions on this issue. There are girls in their 20s with difficult pregnancies. Life!!!
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Avatar_f_tn
I am 38 and pregnant with our first babe. So happy I waited for the right time and right man to have a baby. We got pregnant the first month we ttc. Life is not as predictible as expected for most of the people. Doctors have personal opinions on this issue. There are girls in their 20s with difficult pregnancies. Life!!!
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5304335_tn?1366221705
I was told at 36 when i found out I was pregnant that I was considered an "old" pregnant lady that anything after 35 they consider old!!  wow - me I had my first child at 27 second at 32 and the only thing I can say about being pregnant at 35 is that I had TWINS...apparently the older you get your chances double :-).  I had less problems with my pregnancy with the twins at 35 than i did with my daughter at 27.  I think it has a lot to do with your lifestyle at the time you are pregnant for instance at 27 with my daughter i worked a lot of overtime etc and drove 40 mins back and forth to work everyday had High blood pressure starting at 34 weeks and was on bed rest also had pre-eclampsia, with my son at 32 years old worked a bunch rode the bus to and from work every day at 40 min ride each way then walked 1/2 a mile each way morning and evening at 35 weeks High Blood Pressure and pre-eclampsia....delivered my daughter and son at 38 weeks completely healthy.  At age 35 pregnant with twins, did not work got laid off stayed at home the whole pregnancy with my 3 yr old son.  NO health issues besides gestational diabetes which i never had to take insulin for i managed on my own eating really well which is good...had a c-section scheduled at 38 weeks started high blood pressure at 37 weeks delivered TWINS at 37 weeks full term no issues health wise to me or to them they weighed 5pds 1 oz and 6pds 4oz...  i totally believe because i wasnt stressed with work and my lifestyle was different even though i was older my pregnancy was easier and healthier for me and my baby.  I dont think you can judge on age alone... I would go for it if i were you
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