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8488481 tn?1410326209

Need advice from you older moms...

I think I trust you moms a bit more than the 18+ community, because I know you guys been there and done that multiple times... well im actually just looking for advice... im 19 and this is my first baby, I havent lived with my parents since I was 17 ive been really trying to make it on my own, I graduated Valedictorian, bought my first car on my own from a dealership, was working and started cosmotology school shortly after I found out I was pregnant and everything fell apart. I lost my job, & now my babies father Is paying car note I always been independent and now im relying on my babies father and welfare ! Im to proud to ask my parents for anything and they wouldnt be of help anyway because their failures... I feel helpless and if I didnt have him I wouldnt be able to raise a child on my own... I just neef to get on my own 2 any advice on how to do it ?
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Avatar universal
Its supposed to say the best advice i can give u is to take it one day at a time.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I understand ur dred nd worry. I have very similar issues. The best advice i can give it to take it one day at a time. And not freight about what u cant do. And try to appreciate what u do have. Thats the best silver lining that kept me from going into depression. Make a new plan nd goals but dont stress in u dont get them done in time or life throws u another curve ball. Stay focused nd keep moving foward . I wish u all the best
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I truly believe if you have faith in God and ask Him to help you through this situation, He will! And take these ladies' advice as well. Congratulations on your baby.. they truly are little miracles!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I have been there I had a little girl my marriage end when she was 1 1/2 was on food stamps.  4 years meet someone on wrong track in life I had another baby girl I was on food step and win I was so frustrated with life in general but I dust myself of put myself though school I meet my now husband sometimes we go through things that make you a better parent and a better person keep your head up you will make it through
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I admire you. You ate taking on so much and most be terribly scared but you can do this.  Get back into school and not cosmetology school, a college asap. You will get a ton of financial aid as an independent student and it should be enough to support you after the baby is born with a.part time job. You also will have access to daycare that way. Find something like ultrasound tech, radiology, as a valedictorian you'd should be able to get into a program.  Not a private school epithet the local tech school or state school will do just fine. With ACA any medical training well be a lucrative family supporting career for you'd and your child.  Let him help. He is as responsible for this child as you are forever so don't get into the mindset that this is your problem and not his or he could get that into his head and that will be disastrous for you and your child. You are fortunate that he cares let him.  Give years from now you will thank me for that advice.  Never use the child as a tool or weapon against him.  Allow him to love the child and he will always be there for you both.  You are pregnant take every bit of help your can get.  I work full time and still went and got energy assistance because I qualified and by doing so I can afford a crib...  lorl into every bit of help out there.   Good stamps health insurance wic educational stuff. Find a good local non profit community service agency that helps people get on their feet and make them help you. They want to help, have a mission to help and we'll be eager to help someone like you who is smart and reaching out and eager to get help.  Good luck and message me the city where you live off you want more detailed assistance. I do this for a living in Milwaukee so I know what I'm talking about and have lots more help for you.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Trying to go back to school is your best bet.  It allows you to have more time with your kids now while working towards a goal. Plus you will probably be happier in the long run because you will be able to make more money allowing you to be more independent. More people than you know find themselves young and pregnant and not knowing what to do. Do your best. It will be hard emotionally at first....but you can do it.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Like you I left graduated and left early. A million time I wanted to call it quits and go "home" but never felt like it was really my home. Being so young you will hit a ton of bumps in the road, but you just have to keep in moving. Don't be ashamed to accept help especially from the father of your child because win, lose or draw for the next 18 years you guys are in this together. Get all the help you can, if you want to go back to school aim for that. While your out of the game pregnant  use your skills from home, network or just plain hustle. There is a huge difference between a hand up and a hand out. Use Welfare as a stepping stone and you will be on your A game in no time.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
U can definitely pick yourself back up. First things first. U need to get all the help u can from the state. Section 8, food stamps, and childcare. Once u finish healing, start applying for jobs immediately! And also get back into school. I know it's hard depending on others since you've been independent for so long but you'll be okay. Trust in God, stick to the plan and you'll be back on ur feet in no time.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
We have a motto in my family, pick yourself up, dust off, and believe in yourself. You'll get through it! Making it on your own is not as important as accepting help to care for yourself while pregnant and when baby comes. That baby should come before your pride, period. Don't expect hand outs, just get up and do it for yourself. I was in your shoes 10 years ago, and now I'm the mother of 2 beautiful intelligent children with my 3rd on the way. You just gotta find your motivation (which most likely is that live beautiful creature you're carrying) and get done what needs to get done however you have to do it. If you need help, get it, and pay back later if necessary. Everybody has hard times doll, you live and learn :-) good luck sweetie, you'll get through this hard time and be proud of yourself later!
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I'm an atheist I trust in me. Trust you can bring yourself out of this. Its OK to get help just keep moving forward.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
God will never give us more than we can handle.  There is nothing wrong with accepting help when needed. Everyone needs help at one point in their life :)
Helpful - 0
7759908 tn?1399416727
don't be discourage you have to think that you are about to be a mother soon. Stay positive for your child everything will eventually fall back into place. if you have faith in God everything will work out I PROMISE just be patient
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Make a plan and stick to it. The state will pay for you to go to school and look for a part time job.
Helpful - 0
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