Our Pregnancy Support Forum is for women 35 years and older. This is where you can communicate with other women who share your interest in pregnancy and childbirth issues. This forum is not monitored by medical professionals.
I am a 47yr old woman who recently married the man I had a child with and almost married 20yrs ago but we split up back then as he was into recreational drug use. He no longer is and is a wonderful husband so we are not using contraception as would like to have another child and do it "right" this time but after 6ths Im still not pregnant. My periods are regular but I have noticed that the changes I used to notice around the middle of the month to indicate that I was fertile have ceased. Would this be due to the start of the menapause, I dont have any other syptoms (symptoms) tho, or is it some other reason?? Thanks for reading. Hope you can help.
I just turned 46 and have beaten all of the odds and had two natural pregnancies in the last 6 months. So I'm full of facts on conceiving at a very advanced age. When I was 45, I was told that the odds of my conceiving with my own eggs were 1 in 200. So I'm sorry to say, your odds of conceiving at 47 will be much worse. At 45, the odds of a miscarriage if a woman does conceive are 75% due to chromosomal abnormalities; both of my pregnancies did end in miscarriage. At 47, the odds of miscarriage if you do get pregnant are probably even higher. So it's not impossible to have a baby at 47, but it is extremely unlikely. You should go talk to a Reproductive Endocrinologist, who can run tests to see where you are in relation to menopause. Your FSH score will tell you how many eggs you have left (mine is still high normal, and my periods are still regular), but all women in their mid-40s have mostly abnormal eggs left. The one really good option open at our age is donor egg ivf; they would mix your husband's sperm with the eggs of a younger woman (who looks like you), and you would carry the baby to term. That is undoubtedly what most famous women are doing when they show up pregnant after 45, but no one discusses this. With donor egg ivf, your odds for a healthy pregnancy are those of a woman the donor's age. My husband and I are in the process of international adoption, so it's not a good time for us to do a donor egg ivf cycle, but we are seriously considering that process once the adoption is complete. In the meantime, we are still trying on our own, but knowing it will take a miracle to have a healthy pregnancy with my own eggs. Sorry I don't have better news for you....I do wish you the best!
I'm 46 and have been TTC for 1 year. We have tried fertility drugs in every form, IVF once with my eggs (all test came back great) and still no success. We are now doing IVF with donor eggs. Transfer day is 11/12. Don't let time creep up on you. They will only do donor IVF up to age 50. Go see an RE like BG has said. Look at all your options and pick the one with the highest success rate. Best of luck and many prayers.
Hell MM, I just had a question about the tests you had on your own eggs for IVF. I am just over my 7th M/C and am 45 years old. I have been pregnant 7 times in the past three years and none have lasted. FSH was fine, I ovulated on the same day give or take one or two days every month, etc., regular cycles, etc. I got pregnant 50% of the time. I was told, since I do not want to use donor eggs, that if I am a candidate for IVF that they can check for chromosomal issues before implantation. So my question to you was if you went throught that process, when you say 'all tests came back great but you weren't successful', does that mean you didn't produce enough eggs, or when you did, none were viable? Just wondering about your experience with IVF and using your own eggs....and if you had no viable eggs the first try, did they advise you not to even bother again? Your advice here in this thread s spot on. Best of luck everyone!!!
Well, after my results came back, my RE said by looking at my numbers he would never guess my age. I responsed well to the meds and we got 7 eggs at retrievel. Four fertilized, three made it to transfer. Grade of those three: 1-10, 1 being the best, I had 1 grade 1 and 2 grade 2's. We did not do the PGD which is the test to check for abnormalities because there is a risk of damage to the embryo's when preforming this. With only 3 eggs we could not take the chance. As you age you not only have fewer eggs but eggs of lesser quality. My RE told us going into this that even with good numbers our chance of success was only about 5%. Even with that small of a chance we just had to try at least once. He said I had what you would call a text book cycle and he would try again but he really felt that our best chance was with donor eggs. We do not have ins that covers infertility so we have paid for everything out of pocket. That being said we decided we could not try again with my eggs. We could only afford one more try and it had to be the one with the best odds. So we are now doing IVF with donor eggs. Everything is going well. Transfer day is set for next week some time. Best of luck and prayer to all.
Just to add to what Debra said: I was told that if you are 45 and using your own eggs, an RE will put all of the embryos in, no matter what quality (even if 7-8 embryos). The hope is that one will work out. Sometimes a poor quality embryo works and a high quality one does not. He said sometimes several implant, but then they all die in different weeks. Nationally the statistics show that the chance of a baby actually being born from ivf with 45 year old eggs is less than 1%; you can see the statistics on the CDC's Assisted Reproductive Technologies website (www.cdc.gov/art/). So it's really uphill, but sometimes a person feels they need to try anyway, of course. P.S. to Debra: Wishing you the best on TRANSFER DAY!
Hi! Thanks for posting that website. If the CDC says that a live birth from IVF by a 43 yr old woman is 5.4%, then doesn't that mean that the chance of that same 43 yr old women getting pregnant and giving birth on her own isn't even on the scale... since IVF increases the odds.... So in a way, even though 5% is LOW, it would be even lower to conceive naturally, and successfully, right? I'm getting cold feet with my IVF because of the stats and the costs. I guess I need to just go into it knowing it's a big risk, but just pray I'll be one of those 5%. Uggh!
Thank you for your response and I wish you so much luck next week. Wow, 7 eggs, good for you!! I guess if we're all concieving naturally, we've all beaten the odds already so statistics are just a very general guideline. I have what I thnk is a healthy skepticism about these fertility doctors anyway. I've been to one of their houses, full-on marble everywhere on the most chi-chi street in our city. Multi-million dollar home. Having said that, I will still consider IVF but for anyone younger I'd advise doing a lot of homework before rushing in and spending big $$ right off the bat.
Interesting, I was never told that genetic testing could risk damage to an embryo. I was told most recently they would test me to see if IVF was a possibilty and the fertilized embryos would be tested for genetic abnormalities. But I have been to several doctors and endocrinologists and have read so much on websites it's interesting to me how each doctor tells a patient something different....I'd certainly prefer to do genetic testing before rather than wait for ten weeks once pregnant and then do testing. Anyway, thanks ladies, this has been so helpful. I am getting all excited for you all. I have one son and he is such a blessing. I would consider donor eggs and adoption but because of our very small family and already different genetics on the 'other' side, I wanted him to have a sibling he was at least 50% genetically connected to. But whatever happens, happens I guess! (I think 5% sounds pretty darn good!)
I just wanted to say something about your hope to give your son a sibling he's 50% related to. When I was 7, my parents adopted a baby boy after several years of infertility and miscarriages. (I am not adopted.) I had no idea that they were having fertility problems, of course, but I was absolutely thrilled to finally have a sibling. My brother and I have similar mannerisms, a similar sense of humor, similar interests, and even look alike, as the adoption agency matched our ethnic background. He is in every sense my brother. My parents were always very positive about adoption and loved and treated us equally, so I never really thought about the fact he wasn't biologically related to me. If it comes to the point where your only option to have a viable pregnancy is donor eggs, I just wanted to say that I don't think children really think about or care whether their siblings are biologically related, and any child you would raise would be like you in all of the ways that really matter....
I am so glad you wrote this. I have adoption papers here that I have not filled out yet and in fact, have leaned more towards adoption than I have donor eggs. Whatever I decide, your story is probabl extactly what I needed to hear right now. It was wonderfully written and I thank you for sharing that.
The REs are getting better and smarter each year. What they knew years ago is now yesterday's news. The hard way, my wife and I had good and bad luck on IVF cycles. The first started because of 14 years of marriage without any children while we always took care or 2-4 at a time of our over 50 neices and nephews and finally were able to find out more about it and more importantly, afford it. My wife only had only 1 ovary since 34 when we got 16 eggs but only 5 were of excellent or good quality. So we implanted the 3 excellent (no PGD) and had triplets until 16 weeks, then lost one. We cryo froze the good ones and recently tried them, my wife now 36 and I near 50, but neither survived the thaw. So instead of going through the grieving over again, we looked into it and found our new insurance (and more each year) covered fertility, unlike a couple years ago when you had to take out a car loan ($5-7k for meds alone). So right away the cycle timing was upon us and we went for an IVF cycle, (not a frozen egg transfer for more money,) this time we did PGD since my wife is over 36. PGD although expensive and not covered by any insurance (and fought by pro-life groups since you could selectively implant by sex). It elliminated the obvious chromosomally damaged embryos (just in nature there is a large percentage, but even more as we get older) not all the chromosomes, but at least the chromosomes that will undoubtedly lead to miscarriages. Of 16 follicles, there were 14 eggs good enough to fertilize, 12 of which survived to candidate for PGD (although 2 had no nuclei and 1 4Xs and double chromos in the rest, definitely abnormal). Against odds, we ended up with only 2 chromosomally normal embryos, 1 boy "A grade", 1 girl (told B, but finding out really C by looking at results myself). Today we had our first u/s and there is 2 there but one shows heart rate, the other hopefully too early to tell although the body languages of the nurses were not optimistic and avoiding the subject/area. (This is at 6wks2 days +-5days, pretty early, the second one darker and more irregular, but same size but no noticeable heartrate, although the 1st one had a visible hear rate, it was too earl to sync on the rate to consistently hear it - basically telling me it is pretty early, another week should wrap it up).
The bottom line is there is always hope and technology that compliments the miracles of life. Via implantation or medical help, using new techniques (PGD) correctly and ethically lets you can do more than select embryo candidates by just seeing how good they look on the surface; rather, look deeper and the miracle may be just a little harder to see. As with many things, do not judge a book by its cover (PGD vs visual). Among all, given all the percentages and lack thereof, each of us are here by chances way below 5%; matter of fact way below small fractions of a percent given what it takes from all parts of the life-giving spectrum (timing, chemistry, competition among reproductive cells, among the many). As a viable alternative, we also koe that it takes more than a doner to make a parent. Kids and siblings are born without prejudice. It is what they learn or how they are taught that we realize we are all brothers and sisters.
Try any or al; since the results are eternally satisfying it is comforting to know that some things never change (unconditional love) and there are things that get better with age (technology, life expentancy, life starting).
so many mixed information out there from still haveing a healthy menstrual cylce being able to conceive to you should for get it i would like to have a baby with my husband, we have a 23, 21 and a 13 year old, but i feel at my age now that i have the time to fully enjoy this upcoming pregnancy and document it all, i am so looking forward to breast feeding and giving birtth naturally, i feel that my husband and i are closer now than we had ever been, we have been married for 28 years. please someone give us come encouraging advice thanks clb
I wish all the best to all of you that want to get pregnant later in life. I on the other hand I'm 47 years of age and have been told by two different doctors that getting pregnant at this time in my life would be highly unlikely. I also have oesteopenia and don't feel right passing this disease to a new born but if all of you are healthy than God Bless. I lost track of time and since my first born who is now 6 years old was and still is a very high maintenance child, I realized I wanted to have a second one too late. I also have a slipped disk on my lower back, sciatic pain down my right leg and have chronic sinus issues. Any words of encouragement are welcome.
Fil780 want words or encouragement :) i was told not to get pregnant after my back was fused at 26yrs old. I'm 38 having baby number FIVE and second since my fusion. Yes it's been kind of tough at times pain etc but first one after surgery was and is okay healthy etc. Second seems to be doing good due in 4 wks. So it can happen :) best of luck :)
Hi there, I decided not to try and conceive after all. I have very bad back pain which includes, sciatic pain that runs down both of my legs, and I also have plantar fasciitis (heel pain on both of my feet). I'm also going to school trying to better my job. I also have a six year son who is very active in sports etc. I think I'm sticking with one child. Thank you for all your support.
I just celebrated by son's 10 month birthday. He was born when I was 47 years old. He was conceived naturally. I was not trying to get pregnant and he was a surprise! Anything can happen! My other boys are 21, 20, and 17 years old.. He is beautiful and healthy with no chromosomal abnormality. I was not planning on another child, but I would not change anything. Sometimes I get scared about having to go through everything again and I wonder if I can be the mom he needs. Also, I am a single mom.
Ok, so if all our eggs are too old at our ripe old ages (47) and chromosomally abnormal then why have I never ever had a single +HPT which has ended in a mc? We have been TTC naturally with supplements for over 12 months and 4 of those months have been with Clomid and still no pregnancy.
Is it possible then that the eggs aren't being fertilised either because of a hostile environment or some other missed meeting? I am determined not to believe that my eggs are totally useless and am seriously considering an IUI. I can appreciate women saying IUIs don't work if you are getting mc after mc, but some of us never have mc's so perhaps an IUI would work?
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