what to do after two failed ivf

Just wondering if im alone im 38 and i have had 2 failed ivf cycles and i caint afford to do anymore since i payed for ivf out of my pocket with no insurance.Im so saddend that my cycles failed.Not only did my both cycles failed but i aslo lost two family members at the same time.At the time of my first cycle my sister died from nine gun shot wounds to the head at her place of buisness.After speaking to my fertility doctor she imformed me that my cycle failed due to stress.Not giving up even though at this point my funds had dwindled down me and my husband decided to remortgage our home to try again.My second cycle started in oct/07 this time things looked great and then yet again to my dismay i got another call that my grandmother that i loved so dearly had lost her battle to rectum cancer she died nov/8/2007 again my cycle failed.I was devaststed and shocked that at a time like this when im trying to create life i was losing my beloved family members.Why am i so bad lucked i caint afford to do ivf again im struggling i still think this is all a dream.Need some good advice

[SoCalTricia]

Well, I have no advice to give you...but I wanted to let you know that you have support and comfort here, if you are interested. I'm so very sorry that you have gone through this. You will find that many ladies here have had numerous failed IVF attempts. Does your doctor give you any other options? Do you have health insurance at all?

Tricia

[2try]

No i have no health insurance i paid for my both attemps out of pocket.Also before i started my second cycle of ivf i knew this would be the last attempt because of the expense i made an appointment to speak with my doc.I suggested surrogacy and she told me i didn't need that i was just going through stress on my first attempt and that second  ivf cycle would most likely be successful.

[adgal]

Wow, you have had a rough time of it.  I am so sorry you have had such a difficult time the last few years.  I honestly don't know what advice to give you except to talk to your RE about it.  I also think you might get some really good advice on the fertility forum as many more there would have done IVF and other fertility treatments.  I have only tried clomid and can't claim to know much about fertility beyond that.  I wish you well and I hope your life takes a more positive path from here on in.  Take care and good luck to you!

[belana]

I'm so sorry for your losses. I know how desparaging it can be. I'm 39 almost 40 and had 3 biochem pregnancies last year that all miscarried within 2 weeks (each time I tested days before my period was due and got bfps, and then got my period anyway). After that, I went to an RE and had 2 IUIs that did'nt work and then went for an IVF (self pay). I was devastated when it turned out that I'm a low responder and with all the IVF drugs I was on, I only produced 2 eggs. So they cancelled the IVF and just did IUI.  I was so depressed.  I had sex extra times with my husband just to make the most of it, but was convinced I'd blown it and was looking at going to another specialist.  To my surprise, I actually did get pregnant again, but again was sure I would just miscarry since even the day I tested positive, I was having period cramps. I insisted to my RE that I start taking progesterone right away and credit that with saving the pregnancy, which may have been the problem all along.  I'm now 9w pregnant and everything is going fine so far.  For you to figure out what you need to get pregnant, you really need to find the cause.  Have you ever been pregnant? What does your doctor say is the problem? Also, so you know, I met a woman who was 38 on another forum who had struggled for several years. She finally gave up on IVF and about 5 months later she was pregnant through natural means. Stress can impact your ability to get and stay pregnant.  The best thing you can do is try to exercise and eat well and de-stress as much as possible. -- and find out exactly what the problem may be.

[2try]

Wow thanks for the response.No i have never been pregnant me and my husband tried for years before going to a fertility doc that's when i found out i had a tubal problem.My doc suggested that i had them removed instead of doing surgrey to repair them i really was not happy with the decision but i did it anyways.Once my doc told me that my ivf would be more successful without them i then had them removed.