Help going through my first Miscarriage

[4Adelita]

Hi,
I'm 39 years old.  We have three healthy boys.  We were so excited to concieve as we were trying for our girl.  We waited til Thanksgiving to share the news with our family.  I was 8 weeks pregnant and so excited to share the news.  As soon as we revealed that we were expecting and got all the congratulations, I started to spot...brown.  I went to bed rest and prayed that all would be fine.  I had my first dr appt on Monday.  The spotting continued but no cramping.  Then on Sat. I began cramping along with cloting.  Sunday I went to the ER and the vaginal u s confirmed that there was not hb.  I was still optimistic.  Threaten Miscarriage.  Went home and rested but pain escalated.  Still bleeding...On Monday, my doctor confirmed no HB and said the fetus was 6weeks.  She suggested I get a D & C.  I refused.  Blood count lowered.  It is now Wednesday and I have been bleeding like a light period, have had severe cramping and lower back pain.  It really feels like labor pains.  I do not want to get a D & C.  I have not passed tissue or my baby.  I'm anxious to know what the stages of the miscarriage are.  Is this just the begining?  Or have I passed already.  I'm really careful everytime I go to the bathroom.... How long will this pain last?  I plan to give my body two weeks...and I'm praying I won't need a D & C.  Is it better to go on with my normal day activity or stay in bed rest?  Thanks for your support and comfort in sharing your stories.  It really helps.   .

[stacey10]

I went to a fertility specialist the other day and he has given me real hope, he wants to put me on dhea for 3 months and then thinks that I have a really good chance of getting that one good egg, I just have to finish b/feeding, but will carry on until he is 12 mths

[cutter1974]

My obgyn told me on Tuesday that my eggs are old too.  It sure hurts to hear that.
I had a missed miscarriage of twins in August, and might be having another miscarriage right now. I go for another ultrasound on Monday to find out for sure.
My heart goes out to both of you for the losses you are going thru.

[stacey10]

Usually the heavy nleeding doesnt just start, I mean it can, but that was my worry, as well I just carried around a couple of pads with me just in case, I am as ok with my miscarriages as you can be, for me wanting another baby,  , the miscarriages are to be expected and my eggs are old, I dont really think feeling constipated is part of it, well it wasnt for me, but  it maybe for you

[4Adelita]

Thanks...
I'm just afraid if I'm out and about and I suddenly start bleeding heavily... But I appreciate you sharing an estimated time...it gives me hope...
Is feeling constipated normal?
So sorry for your loss.

[stacey10]

I have just finished a miscarriage my 3rd (old eggs) yoiu sound like you are at the start so thats good news that things are moving along and you should be able to pass everything naturally, you will find that the bleeding should get heavier over a couple of days, the cramping you are feeling is you uterus  shedding the sack etc, then your cervix should open a small bit, enough for the contents to pass and if everything passes, your bleeding should taper back off to period like bleeding, mine took a total of 8 days, and I just carried on as normal, I think if your up and active it helps things along abit more, I thought the cramps felt like after pains, ouchy, as we get older so do our eggs and the risk of miscarriage does increase, but just remember every pregnancy is a new egg, sorry for your loss