Hello, Just an introduction more than a question. Looking to find other women in similar situation as myself. 2nd marriage, 2 children from 1st, but my husband and I have been trying (he does not have any bilogical). After 2 miscarriages, we struggle with the decision to try again, or be content with life as is. I know we both can be, however we wanted to try as long as possible to have one more. I know many others must go through the same struggle, so please contact me if you would like to share either side of the decision....trying again or accepting life as is. Thanks!~KK
I was 28 when I had my last (or so I thought) baby.
My hubby (at that time) had a vasectomy.
We divorced several years later and I met a very nice man who had always wanted a child of his own. I had several miscarriages ( one being on my 40th birthday) before we went full term with our now 2 year old son.
I had another miscarriage almost 2 weeks ago now...I'll be 44 in a few months...and hubby still wants to try for another.
If I'm not too old, neither are you. lol
The only down side to later life pregnancy is that you tire more easily, but you have way more patience than with your first baby(s). lol
You will make him the happiest man on Earth by giving him the one thing that he has been missing out on.
Good luck with whichever way you decide to go!
I just turned 42. I have one child from a previous marriage. I married again at age 40 and started trying right away. My DH has no children. In the past 2 years we have had 1 miscarriage and alot of tests. My FSH is 15 and have been told there is only a 5% chance with fertility treatments. We are going thru an IUI cycle right now after having to cancel the first IUI when I ovulated too early on my own. It is hard to just give up but hard to keep going with such disappointment. I know my DH wants a child as much as I do and that makes it even harder. I know we'll be happy together without a child, but it will always be there, just in the back of our minds. I can't really help you with a decision, I can't even decide for myself. I just want you to know you are not alone. And there are alot of women who have healthy children after 40, it can happen even when the doctors say it can't. You just have to decide how much you want to go thru to get there. There is also a site for 40+ women TTC here: http://www.medhelp.org/forums/TTC-Over-40/show/516?camp=msc&personal_page_id=870598 Good luck to you. I hope you are able to have the baby you want. Take care.
Thanks for sharing and offering some support and hope. I am not one to usually share the negative things in my life, especially with strangers, but this is different somehow. Just knowing that other women understand how I feel and what I am going through makes things easier to deal with. I know there is hope for many....and no one can make that kind of decision for someone else....just need to go through that process of making hte decision to try again or not. We said that we would stop after a couple of IUI's...that we would not continue to IVF, but here we are now making that decision. Seems that because I am able to get pregnant(just not sustain the pregnancy!!) that we now want to keep trying. We over think it , I guess. We do not want to get so desparate that then it is more difficult to overcome. If it is a decision we make to stop trying, then it seems that we can go through the process of accepting things as they are. Make any sense? Anyway...thanks for listening, and I would love to have a few women on here to check in with now and then and be of some support to one another. Feel free to send messages diectly to my inbox. And.....Good luck! What are your situations presently?
I am 48 and my partner and i are desperate for a baby. I haven't had a proper period since Feb/March, i have to say that i am feeling different, i have some of the classic signs but every test comes up negative. I just had my bloods taken which came back saying i was perimenopausal which doesn't mean i can't conceive, it just means the odds are against us. I wanted to discuss my options with my G.P who was clearly not interested at all, i am going to have another blood test done in the morning for pregnancy but am worried sick that i could be having a phantom. My breasts and nipples are sore, i have bloating, there has been a tiny amount of lactation and a peculiar sensation in my lower abdomen, no sickness but eating like a horse and obvious weight gain. I feel i'm going crackers and have become obsessed with every page about my situation i can find on the net. Any advice would be welcomed before i blow a fuse, Louise.....
It can be so confusing when our body sends us mixed signals like that. Obviously the blood test is the only way to know for certain if it's a pregnancy, but I can relate to some of what is going on with you. I have not been tested to see if I am perimenopausal, but am starting to believe that I am. My periods are becoming somewhat irregular which of course is a classic sign. I also am finding that starting around ovulation time up to when my period arrives, I too have sore breasts, nipples sometimes and many of the other classic early pregnancy signs. I have been doing some reading up on it, and it seems this is not uncommon in perimenopausal women. Our bodies are changing and obviously our hormones are a bit out of whack, so this happens to many.
These days pregnancy tests are pretty accurate. If you have taken several showing negative then chances are good this is not a pregnancy, but something similar to what I have described. So no, you are not crackers (although trying to conceive can sure make you feel that way sometimes). It is accurate though that your chances of conceiving naturally are low. I don't mean to be negative, but I know you already know that. If you are open to it, one of the things you might want to consider is IVF with donor eggs. There are of course other options as well, but there have been many women here who have had great success going that route. Whatever you choose, I wish you the absolute best!
Hi, I feel you have to try as much as possible so you don't get past the time you can, and then regret it. I fear I have been stupid and left the most important thing to living, too late. I am 46 and spent my life teaching other peoples children. For the past couple of years we've been fostering. Last June I had an m/c of a uch wanted baby. I can't seem to get over it. I panic that its all too late. I am 4, nearly 5 years older than you. Go for it, don't regret it. I have no birth children, but over easter fostered a tiny baby girl for a short while. It just made me want my own all the more. Each month when I see THE WITCH (af) I want to crack up and cry for a week. My husband has no understanding of my emotions and I have no mom or anyone to talk to. I too hope to communicate with people on hear in a similar situation. We could hopefully be a comfort to each other
Reading your story was like telling my own. I am 42 years old, remarried to a wonderful man 10-10-10 after being together for 10 years. I have two children (23 boy and 24 girl) from first marriage. He had one child that he really never got the chance to know. We wanted a child and started about 8 years ago. We have had 2 miscarriages and basically we were told it wasn't going to happen. Low and behold, nature stepped in! I went to the doctor in January for my check up and came out pregnant! We are currently 25 weeks and 4 days.
I have a history of endometriosis and fibroid tumors and after the laparoscopy our odds weren't good. Do not let anyone tell you that just because you have a two miscarriages you cannot carry. Several women here have had quite a bit more and are now the loving mums they deserve to be.
Yes, being of AMA (Advanced Maternal Age) you would be considered higher risk for genetic issues but don't let the scare you. It will be an emotional rollercoaster as you pass each hurdle but the end result far outweighs the overzealous doctor's risk assessment.
Our beautiful Katie passed all her tests with flying colors and we can't wait to meet her! I wish you the best and if it is in your heart to keep trying then by all means keep trying. I always knew I was meant to have three kids I just didn't know that they would be 23 years apart! Good luck and God Bless!
Hi! My mom had the last of her 5 children at 42. I am now 38 and the last one conceived at my mom's 42 year og age is 24.It's a definite yes!!!!!!Give it a try, my mom was and is so grateful for having had kids at that age...She also had the 4th at 40...It's never too late, I mean you're still young, it's not like you're deciding at 52...!So good luck!Ps, I've been doing alot of research and I don't think it'll be as difficult as it seems...good luck and fingers crossed!
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