Just want it to stop.

[Tisstash]

I have no idea where to start on this. Guess I'll just dive in.  6w 2days pregnant and beyond paranoid. Before I found I was pregnant I was on a bunch of medications. Day after I found out, I dropped all of them cold turkey. Which at least one of them your supposed to be "whined" off of. I have a nice list of mental issues, a few are major depression, borderline personally disorder, ptsd. (Just to name the more critical ones).  For the past10 days I've cut caffeine totally. I cant tell rather or not, all my pregnancy symptoms or some are actually from being pregnant or from the caffeine/medication withdraws. Also it's not uncommon for me to be emotional or overly b*tchy, when I'm not on those medication. That's the least of the paranoid crap. I wont touch anything with caffeine-cause of the risk of a miscarriage, I wont even go near my cat and freak out when he jumps on my bed, scared to take a shower or bath, flipped out on my boyfriend for not getting Prenatal vitamins till yesterday. I'm actually contemplating not letting my 7year old go to the first ultrasound, in case there isn't a heart beat. Also been paranoid, cause I was reading if you have diarrhea, it could be a sign of an early miscarriage. I'm also very overweight, which adds to me being paranoid.  More nights then not I've gone to bed crying, holding my stomach and saying please don't die. I don't get my first ultrasound till the day after Christmas. My Dr. already knows about the medications, and how I went cold turkey on them all, she already knows I'm overweight(by a lot).  Yet the only way I can get in sooner then my appointment is if my crampyness( that is pretty much gone) is on one-sided, which only time it is, is if I wait to go to the bathroom for to long, but then it goes away.  I have even thought about lying about it to my Dr. saying I hurt like hell, just so I get in sooner. I just want the paranoid crap to stop. And no, being paranoid isn't "normal" for me.  Right now I'd welcome sore breasts and morning sickness.

[GoBrandiRanger]

Hun, the stress you're going through is way worse for you than all those things combined. I'm 5'3" and 285lbs. I've only gained one pound at 20+3. I have 2 kittens, smoke 6 cigs a day, eat tylenol like its candy due to a pinched nerve and had 9 miscarriages while actually adhering to all the guidelines for pregnancy.

None of the things you're stressing over are worth the trouble. Stress is FAR more likely to cause miscarriage because it releases hormones that indicate this isn't the ideal time to have a child.

Please relax, take a deep breath, and be happy. You're pregnant!!!!

[Tisstash]

Sorry it took me me so long to answer this. My computer crashed, took forever to reformat it and get crap back on it.   1. My Dr. does know I quite cold turkey on everything. 4/6 medications I was on I was told aren't good to be on when pregnant. Which made 1 of those I could take pretty useless cause it was like a "booster" for one of the ones I can't take.  Which left just one, which I really don't need now cause it was to help me sleep. And I really don't need help with that at the moment.  I'm also not really willing to be put on anything. I give Tylenol and stool softener the "evil eye". The cat thing, I haven't changed a liter box since my first positive pregnancy test. My problem is he tracks his liter everywhere. The overweight thing, maybe I should of said obese. Like 320ish. That alone scares the crap out of me.  My number 1 issue is not being able to figure out if the pregnancy symptoms I do have, are actually from being pregnant or from cutting out my medications and caffeine. Being they mimic each other well.

[Des92]

Does your doctor know about all the medications you were on and does he/she know you quit them cold turkey?  You can have caffeine in small amounts.  I was very paranoid  about caffeine as well and didn't have any in my first trimester, but now I have about 32 oz a week.  Just relax (I know that is easier said then done) but what will happen will happen.  Stress will only make things worse.  I would say, just spend this time being excited you are pregnant and take it one day at a time.  You really shouldn't lie to your doctor to get a ultrasound earlier because the later you get it the more chance of hearing a heartbeat you will have.  Wait until atleast week 7 to get one.

[soon2bmamma]

I'm sorry you are having such a tough time, I struggle with anxiety which I went off my medication for cold turkey as well, I haven't struggled so much with being off the medication but I do have paranoia a little where every issue I have I think I'm gonna miscarry (i've had 1 previously) just remember that worrying for your baby comes with the territory & I also wished I would have nausea just to reassure myself that I was still pregnant...well let me tell ya, I got what I wished for and its not fun at all, now I am mostly only focusing on staying healthy for the baby & trying not to think of worst case scenario as much as possible :) good luck and just stay positive and keep yourself nice and busy until your Dr appt

[Seawork]

Also your cat won't harm the baby, just don't clean the litter box anymore and you'll be fine.

[Seawork]

You should talk to your doctor about getting on some medication while you are pregnant. There are some out there that won't hurt the baby and I think even simple anti depressants might help ease your mind a little. Panicking all the time and having your body in stress is more dangerous to the baby then taking some meds that won't harm the baby. When I got pregnant I quit my bi polar meds cold turkey and contemplated going on something that wouldn't harm the baby but as of now I haven't needed anything yet. I all have that option ready though. I highly recommend you talk to your doctor about your fears. And being over weight isn't a death sentence for your baby. I'm overweight too and now 21+3 and haven't gained a pounds but the baby is perfectly healthy. Try to calm down and defiantly talk to your doctor and consider meds.