Aa
A
A
Close
Avatar universal
People dont think I should have this baby
Okay so I am 25 and pregnant
I have spent my whole life being anti abortion not for anyone else but for myself. The thing is I am now pregnant to a one night stand I have told my family and none of them are speaking to me. To be honest its my group of friends who are being the most supportive. I have told the father  who Is 27 he is English and was supposed to go back to England last week. He really thinks I should have a abortion as he thinks his family would disown him if the found out. He has now decided to stay for another 3 and a half months to help out and said he would support me financially if I have the baby. My family, the father, various friends and accountancies think I should have a abortion and I am only having this baby to be selfish because I don’t want to live my life having had a abortion. Please some advice is so needed.
Cancel
13 Answers
Page 1 of 1
Avatar universal
if you truly want to keep your child you should..i mean i would regarless of the circumstances of it being a one night stand do what would make you happy..there would be no more joy in the world than to be able to experience motherhood..congradulations...as for your parents they'll come around just give them time
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
187316 tn?1386360282
Pssf don't let people tell you what to do. If you want to keep the baby than keep it or if not put it up for adoption. But don't get an abortion just because other people want you to especially if you dont think morally that it is right.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
Speaking from experience if you have an abortion to please or get people off your back or because you were forced into it you'll never forgive yourself, I had one months ago because everyone was telling me it would ruin my life and that i would get no where with a child, i was literally forced to the clinic and in, dont let anyone tell you what is right and wrong for you. If you want this bab have it!
I only wish i was still pregnant and had at least one person telling me it was okay to keep my baby.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
It is your life and not theirs you have to live with the decision. You have to do what is right for you. Your family will come around eventually. And if they don't it is them that will be missing out. Good luck to you.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
271399 tn?1242833735
You can't let other people make the decision for you.  I know it's a confusing situation, but that baby is a life form. There is alwys the option of adoption, and that doesn't kill an innocent baby.  The chose is your's to make, not anyone else. Your family will come around and support you no matter what.  Right now they are just shocked at the fact.  Your friends if they are good friends will also stand behind any decision you make.  As for the father, if he is so worried about his family disowning him he should of thought about that before having unprotected sex. Jesus blessed you with a baby.  There are so many people out there who would love to be pregnant or have a child.  Please don't have an abortion, you will really regret it later.  Pray for the answer & th Lord will provide.  G'luck to you.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
159802 tn?1192050658
Hard decision you have here.  From the outside looking in it's not so bad though.  The decision is ultimately yours.  Are you able to care for a baby.  If the answer is yes i would treat this as maybe a change of pace in your life and maybe meant to be.  What is the issue here?  Is it the fact that it was a one night stand?  What if you had decided to get artificially inseminated? Would it be such a horrible thing/what's the difference.  Maybe your family is just in shock and worry that this will somhow make your life of less quality.  That is for you to decide.  It can definately be a scary time especially if you haven't had a child before but they are a blessing.  The big question is do you want a child.  Abortion is something you never forget.  You never will stop wondering what if?  It's final.  You know all this stuff already.  I don't envy your position.  Think of this in terms of what you have to do for you, not what you have to do for others.  Hang in there hon.  There are many options but the answer is inside you, not anyone else.  Good Luck.  The only thing that will matter if you keep this child is that it is loved and knows that it was a surprise and not a mistake.  Big diff there.  Love is what matters here, and if you keep your baby I have no doubt you will be in love hith him or her.  That's all that's important.  His decision is his as well.  He will live with whatever he decides in regards to staying or going and what he chooses to share with his family.  Don't worry about that part. Just think of you for now.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
Thank you everyone for your advice.
I guess I have really had some time to think and I have decided to keep my baby. I know I am going to be the best Mum I can be and I only hope and pry the father will come around but if he doesn’t I will give my child the best life possible. I think one of the biggest things that made my decision for me was seeing the heart beat and also worrying aobut them already shoes me how much I love them already and couldn’t do anything to hurt them.

Thank you
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
I am so happy you have decided to keep the baby.  I agree that once you see that little heartbeat and you know what is growing inside of you, you just fall in love.  Your maternal instincts are there and you will know things you never thought you knew.  You can do it and I think we are all proud of you for your decision and your courage.  Good luck!
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
159802 tn?1192050658
Good for you Sweetheart!  Hope all goes well for you.  ~XxX~  Happy for you and proud of you as a woman as well!!!
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
293420 tn?1243146538
Congrats and Good Luck! I have had 3 friends (ages 20-25) throughout the past few years get pregnant without trying, and their parents weren't very happy. I told all 3 of them the same thing and now I'll say it to you...your parents will be in love with your baby before he/she even arrives. It gets easier as the months go on, and before you know it they'll be buying little baby things for their grandchild. I got married when I was 22 (after dating for 4 years) and my parents love my husband like their own...but even my mom was upset when I told her I was pregnant (4 months after the wedding). She thought I was too young and even cried...not happy tears! One month later she was talking about "when the baby comes" and was already looking for stuff to buy.

You'll be fine :) It's so exciting! Enjoy every moment!
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
Do what you want, don't let others pressure you.  Or if you are anti-abor, have the child if you are ready or put the child up for adoption.  Adoption does not mean you don't love someone or that your a bad person, it just means you would be giving someone the opportunity to have a child they may not be able to have.  There are people like me out there - I thought I had it all - I had a beautiful son who was killed on Valentine's day this year!  Now I'm trying to conceive but can't.  I'm not in anyway asking for your child, just letting you know that there are people that would be willing to adopt!  Good luck with your decision!
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
271399 tn?1242833735
I'm very happy for you!  Good for you and your decision!  A baby is a blessing from heaven.  There are so many great men out there in the world who would jump at the chance to be a daddy.  Don't worry about the guy, the Lord will provide!  Congrats to you!

Kar0909  I'm very sorry to hear about you son, that is an awful thing.  I pray the Lord blesses you with another beautiful child soon (not that anything can replace your son).  Just know the Lord loves you & will be there to confort you.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Avatar universal
Thank you for your words of encouragement.
I am so sorry for your tremendous  loss that is something no one should ever have to go through. I wish all the best for you and the future efforts to conceive. Hearing your story confirms even more so than before that I will keep my baby and thank God every day for her or him.
Comment
Cancel
Comment
Avatar universal
Comment
Comment
Submit Comment
Your Answer
Avatar universal
Answer
Know how to answer? Tap here to leave your answer...
Answer
Submit Answer
A
A
Recent Activity
89592 tn?1391278022
Blank
PaulaAnn commented on photo
3 hrs ago
2020005 tn?1472427714
Blank
KTowne uploaded new photos
4 hrs ago
2020005 tn?1472427714
Blank
KTowne This pregnancy is going by ... Comment
4 hrs ago
Blank
Weight Tracker
Track your weight throughout your pregnancy
Start Tracking Now
Blank
Pregnancy Tracker
Track your pregnancy
Start Tracking Now
Top Pregnancy Answerers
9442948 tn?1406820051
Blank
1816154 tn?1463433618
Blank
Collage Place, WA
Avatar universal
Blank
Avatar universal
Blank
6470732 tn?1439559892
Blank
Corning, NY
2080231 tn?1444937185
Blank
Royal Oak, MI
Pregnancy: Ages 18-24 Community Resources
RSS Expert Activity
233488 tn?1310696703
Blank
Marathon Running Done Over Many Yea...
05/15 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
233488 tn?1310696703
Blank
New Article on Multifocal IOL vs &q...
05/15 by John C Hagan III, MD, FACS, FAAOBlank
748543 tn?1463449675
Blank
TMJ/TMJ The Connection Between Teet...
01/15 by Hamidreza Nassery , DMD, FICOI, FAGD, FICCMOBlank
Top Pregnancy Answerers
9442948 tn?1406820051
Blank
1816154 tn?1463433618
Blank
Collage Place, WA
Avatar universal
Blank
Avatar universal
Blank
6470732 tn?1439559892
Blank
Corning, NY
2080231 tn?1444937185
Blank
Royal Oak, MI