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8924846 tn?1410572901

Selfish boyfriend

Just need to vent. My boyfriend is really selfish. I know its because of how he was raised, everything handed to him, he was sick so he always had everyone taking care of him. We have broken up several times, sometimes because I can't stand how selfish he is and for other reasons. I'm honestly not sure why I got back with him sometimes but I seem to think I want to be with him. We sometimes stay at his moms sometimes at mine and I buy canned food and keep it in a drawer at his moms so I have food to eat since I don't feel comfortable looking through their cupboards. I have asked him not to eat it but he does anyways. I'm left tonight extreamly hungry and broke because he ate the last of it today. I flipped out on himand his response was iI thought you wouldn't care. Which made me even more mad! I asked him not to eat it! He said I should just go to the kitchen but as I said I'm not comfortable with that and I don't know what I can eat. He's always acting selfishly like this, he could have easily found something in their kitchen. Every day I just feel less and less of the want to be with him. I work, I'm pregnant, and when I'm not working I'm stuck at his house at night because his parents get pissed if neither of us are here with his dog, who is more well behaved than their dogs and he is out with his friends! But I know if I leave him it will be drama, and his family will go after full custody or try and make me a weekend mom which will not happen! I also can't handle the stress of a messy break up. As time goes on it gets worse and he says he's sorry but he doesn't show it. I have no clue what to do but I can't handle this anymore.
15 Responses
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8919982 tn?1400717187
Get ur own place asap cuz if u dont they can put u as unstable parent jumping from one place to another...ur baby do need a roof over his or her head and get a baby shower done so u cqn have enough clothes and diapers ur not stuck ur making urself stuck and scared.by staying their get the h.e.l.l out of their and get ur ownself settled its not easy but its better then staying their with a dude who is a spoiled brat and acts like a kid himself.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Grandparents have no rights, and if you're not an unfit mother, the most they could do is 50/50 custody, which if he's the father, is only fair anyway since eating a couple cans of ravioli isn't exactly reason to not see his child. You really have nothing to worry about unless you happen to be unable to take care of the baby yourself.
Helpful - 0
9987928 tn?1407887995
The courts won't just take your baby away without it being something really wrong with you, like you're on drugs homeless or something.... Even if you were your mother has more rights to your baby than his mother.... Maternal rights are very strong.... Unless you are deemed unfit by the courts there is NO way you baby's dad OR his mom can take away your baby.... I fought almost three long years for my baby and I've been having full custody of her almost two years now.... Never give up or let his mom think that she has the upper hand.... You have a place to stay and earned income.... The court likes to keep a child with its biological mother whenever possible.... Keep your head up and don't let her get to you....
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
You have more rights to your baby than they do. How in the world do you think they could possibly get custody of your baby.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Grandparents don't really have any rights anymore. As long as you have a roof over your head some kind of income and your baby is taken care of then she can't do anything. Plus. If you were to leave now he wouldn't be signing the birth certificate. So he would have to go threw a long process of DNA paternity tests. Affidavits. And then court. By that time your baby will be almost one if not already.  
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8924846 tn?1410572901
Cystic Fibrosis (I've been tested I don't have the gene) but if the court denied him because of it, I know his mom would go for custody herself. She adopted one of her nieces so she's already been through the process of it once. Shes mainly the one making me nervous
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
What kind of illness does he have but even if they try to take your baby away you could always say his illness doesnt let him take care of an imfamt baby just get out dont be afraid they cam do nothing you work and stuff
Helpful - 0
8924846 tn?1410572901
I'm only 18w he's just frustrating and his family seems to constantly guilt trip me. They want me to live with them at his moms house but I don't want to and I don't want his mom to influence how my baby is raised, she did a horrible job, I'm sorry to say it but its true. All her kids are extreamly selfish and feel they are entitled to everything! I just want out but I'm scared I see my therapist Monday I plan on asking her for help
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
And sorry for miss spells my keys are so tight on my phone lol
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
I know how u feel!  Even tho the canned food seemz petty its not it's the point u ASKED him not to i go thru it with my bf i asked him not to eat alot of the candy i take to work to suck on from getting sick but no i find my bf taking handful after handful and than i found he had a stash already of it!!! Im like i clearly stated the purpose of the candy and hes so selfish he just sees a big thing of candy and thinks ita a endless pit so now i cant afford a 13 dollar bag of candy (supose to last for 3 weeks)  so im stuck getting sick .... instead of him seeing the bigger picture he just sees me arguing over candy ita like that's not the point guys dont see the bigger pictur. So were stuck looking like the petty person....
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
How far along are you? I'm sure if u have a job and stable home his family can't no nothing about it, they can't fight a fight knowing that their son can't financially and emotionally care for a baby.She could hire a lawyer and all but your baby has no reason why to go into their custody at all, unless u are on drugs or other bad ways.
Helpful - 0
8924846 tn?1410572901
He just doesn't seem to get it. And ik they'd make it messy. I can't afford a lawyer and his mom would go out of her way to make me look unfit I don't think she would succeed butiI'm afraid she would. I just feel trapped.it kinda ***** because a friend of mine is always there for me and always helping me, he wants a relationship but I'm already in one, he knows the situation and wants me out of it even if I never give him a chance. It ***** knowing there's someone who wants to actually treat me right but I feel trapped with someone who isn't.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
Leave him asap!!! Ur pregnant gurl and if he doesn't do anything out of his way to show u he cares About u and the baby now..then he will never. He needs to grow up and be a man and take care of his lady. After all ur the one carrying the baby and that's hard enough, u don't need any of that extra stress.
Helpful - 0
Avatar universal
They can't take custody unless your deemed an unfit mother
Helpful - 0
8924846 tn?1410572901
Also would like to add he doesn't work because he has a terminal illness and lives on disability, so he sits around playing video games all day
Helpful - 0
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