Single mom vent !

[Cindy0624]

I be feeling a lot he time like texting my child's father n saying look u need to do your part in dis too , I need money to buy things I only have 7 more weeks left. But I'm scared dat his response will just be askin me for a DNA test , everytime I ask for sumthin get he asks for a stupid DNA test its so annoyin he knows it's his. It's so upsetting to dealing with someone so immature. I dont know how much more I can do

[specialmom]

For things you need for the baby before the baby gets here---  are you talking about equipment?  Car seat, stroller, baby bed? That type of thing?  I'd ask friends and family what you can borrow.  Go to Catholic charities or other organizations that are pro life as they might have things to give you.  Check out for used items on Craigs list (I just sold a brand new baby bouncer never out of the box for 20  bucks when I know it cost (it was a gift) 65 at the store.  I forgot to return it and dang, they wouldn't take it back as the time to return it had expired).  You can get deals.  There are second hand shops that sell great things for cheap.  So much baby stuff is used for just such a short amount of time it is like new.  And don't get suckered into getting things that might be nice to have but aren't necessities.  good luck hon

[specialmom]

I think you need to really see the reality.  The issue that happens, and I'm not saying I agree with this, but it takes two to get a girl pregnant but then all the power in terms of keeping the baby goes to the woman.  Men get no say and really don't want to be a father.  So, during pregnancy, they ignore it or choose to not be involved or say they need a dna test.  And there is no legal reason that they have to contribute before a baby is born.  So if they don't want to, they won't.  And your guy doesn't want to. I'd not text him again until the baby is born.  he's over and out.  Once the baby is born, you can file for a dna test (I do believe they charge for it) and establish that he is the father and then they will try to obtain child support.  The thing is, child support depends on his income.  If he doesn't make a lot, you won't get a lot. Our state minimum is 116 dollars a month.  That could be all you get---  which helps.  Definitely, and you are owed that.

But I think you really have to look big picture at this.  he's not going to pony up any extra money most likely.  And if he does find out he is the dad and he is interested, then he'll buy things for HIS house when he has visitation.  Kind of stinks but that is usually what happens.  You'll just get your child support.  Period.

So, you have to look big picture and what you can do to get yourself in a position to be better off financially.  Are you taking any classes or working toward something that will end in a great job with good pay?  That's what I'd really focus on.

Because you can't change him.  You can only improve your own situation.  good luck hon. I know it is hard and scary.  I hope it all works out.

[Cindy0624]

I texted him n again he brought up dat DNA crap , so I said ok u want a DNA pay for it set it up ... N of course he didn't write back . It's just excuses to not be a man .

[ivyluna]

My bf's dad asked for a DNA test. I told him i felt disrespected when he asked but if he wants it, HE can pay for it. Its been 3 months and he is excited to be a grandad.

[JayBoogie44]

Not to mention, he is on the run and I can't even have him tracked down for child support or for him to do ANYTHING ughhh

[JayBoogie44]

ItS gonna be ok hunn I know EXACTLY how you feel. My BD was living with me almost a year and we never were seperate for more than a day. He asked me for a DNA test about 3 months into my pregnancy not to mention he begged me to have his child, was excited & everything. We aren't together anymore but now he isn't ready 2 b a father & all of a sudden he told me & my uncle it was MY fault I got pregnant in the first place. I'm 7 months & he has yet to give me any money for anything for our son But claims he handles his responsibilities but we haven't seen each other for 3 months or had a conversation since like 2 days ago. It's VERY frustrating. I feel your pain hunn. Keep your head up

[mommyof2nowtp]

It doesn't if the father cooperates.. replies back to his letters and they can find him easily. . They eventually had to serve my daughters dad his papers at his job and then he had no choice

[mommyof2nowtp]

I know how you feel it took years literally to get my first child's dad on child support just if he isn't going to help don't count on him or rely on him in any way

[Cindy0624]

Yea but doesn't child support take a long time ?

[mommyof2nowtp]

I'm single mom too I'm 27 weeks and asked twice for money still nothing I don't want be a pest he's annoying and has a gf already and text me stupid shut randomly after not texting in a long time like other day he text saying send me a picture of you and baby. . I didn't even text back! Like no go F*** yourself ugh I'm just to point where I don't even care and am just gonna get him on child support when baby comes

[Cindy0624]

I can't give him a DNA test while I'm pregnant so dat doesn't help . N I don't need to give him no DNA test I was with him 5 yrs . Child support takes months I need money now to buy my daughters stuff now .

[wildwings]

that's how some boys are because if he was a man he would handle his responsibilities as a father. All I can say is give him that DNA test and if he doesn't step up then ..... Child support he helped make that baby so he should do his part. I wish you the best

[Cindy0624]

All the time **