Stupid Question Time...

[Cassandrajane]

I have researched and researched and researched this and I still DO NOT understand a few things.. and I am just wondering... But I did research.

Numberrrr 1. Why do you have to give birth to the Placenta?? I know it seems funny but I just don't get why? Surely it would need to stay in there for another baby?? I duno....

Numberrrr 2. Effaced and Dilated... Right, Effaced is when the Cervix is soft enough foor you to start dilating? Am I right?? Or is it where the cervix is open? I duno... I researched and got confused.. and can you be Dilated without being effaced and vice versa??

Numberrr 3. If Harry is a really goood weight when he is born and keeps the weight on do I wake him up every 2 hrs for a feed... The midwife who done my Anti D said yes, but my new Midwife and the class thingy I went to  and my step mum said No. I duno.. I dont wanna starve, and I dont wanna Over feed him. I'm so confused..

Numberrr 4. In my book it says I should feel him 10 times in an hour, but I've been soooooo stressed and upset I haven't really felt him during the day. His sleeping pattern hasn't changed... he sleeps when I sleep (Woohoo)... I told the midwife I havent felt him much again and she listened for a HB and its 155bpm... even though at the start it was 160bmp... Hmm... Shall I bring this up with my doc on Friday when I go about my depression??

Numberr 5. John loving has a Heart murmur, I don't know if its genetic but his brother has one too.. (Their dad doesnt know they have one though) what are the chances of Harry having one as well??? (I think I asked this before I'm not toooooo sure, I posted on the Heart murmur thingyy but no one got back to me that was a good few months ago...)

I think thats it for now... LOL..
More bump pics will be up once they have been checked (Stupid Police protection) I took them yesterday and they saw them yesterdayyy and they should get back to me in the next half hour actually!!

Thanks guys!

xx
xx

[Cassandrajane]

I will just leave him to wakes up to feed if I am not told otherwise...

And Woah, I didnt know it was Toxic, I know its edible! (GROSS) but didnt know it could cause problems. Ohh...

Harry is having a goood little Wriggle now... I think he might burst outt any second now... seriously. But I read that 10 times in an hr thing and well it freaked me out.

And i'm fine if he has one, I was curious to see if he actually got one!

x

[cassandra19]

To answer your questions here is what i know.

1. if you dont give birth to the placenta you can get a hemorrhage and bleed a lot, a part of mine seemed to got left behind and i almost had to have a blood transfusion and surgery, i am not exactly sure why but it toxic for it to stay inside you.

2.feeling your baby move 10 times in a hour is a little extreme, i never felt my DD that much in a hour, its more like 10-20 times a day. I wouldn't worry to much as long as you feel him at some point. Drink ice water i bet that will make him move.

3. You do not have to wake up henry every 2 hrs to feed, he will feed when he wants too, trust me when i say if you wake him up you will regret it, they usually eat every 2-4 hrs.

4. about heart mumors, i have one, my son has one, my daughter has one too. I am not sure if it hereditary but all i know is all of my kids have them.

[Cassandrajane]

If there is Snow. I wont wanna go home if I get to the hosp... There is already apprently Snow North of where I am... GREAT!
I know wth my Nice SIL she had to stay in because she needed a blood transfusion which they forgot about.... And stuff... I would say I'll see with this SIL who is due soon, but she makes up stuff to get attention and stay longer. I will ask at my scan. I know I need an Anti D. because they give you one if your Rh Neg even if Harry is neg too for further pregnancies?? And with the Lovely Anorexia, I think they'll want me to eat as well before I leave?? Thats just an Inkling though really... But thats their main concern, my mental health and anorexia...

I would feel safer being their for 24hrs after he is born because then if anything happens, they might detect it like with Coles jaundice..

I could NEVER leave here! Its like my get away LOL... Made soooo many wonderful buddies and learnt sooo much stuff and well, I will also haves the help I needs here too:)..
He has fallen asleep with hisfoot in my ribs, I push it out, he puts it back!!
xx

[Ashelen]

here our hospitals require at least 24 hours...which is good because they wouldn't have caught Grey's jaundice if we had gone home before that. some places/hospitals are different. I would personally ring the hospital you're having Harry at and ask :). Both times I was stuck at the hospital 5 days...for my daughter it was because I had to have the blood transfusions and for my son it was for his jaundice...but hopefully you'll only be there a day or two. :) trust me you'll be ready to go home even if it means doing it all without anyone to give you advice LOL....you always have here too.

[Cassandrajane]

Oh I am in a perdicament! (I cant spell)....
Okay, Unless I am told otherwise, I wont wake him... I will see how he goes.. for the first few days!!! and then go from there as well as his weight and stuff...

Do they recommend you to stay in hosp for 24hrs before letting you home?? So they can help a bit? Might be different in different places...

x

[waitn838]

its actually pretty amazing but babies are great at letting you know when they are hungry

despite her prematurity emilee always wakes me when she is hungry and she has been gaining weight just fine

the fear with waking and feeding is over feeding them and then they vomit and there whole feeding schedule is thrown off course

the nurses told me to never let her go more than 5 hours without eating and i never have...she always tells me when she's hungry

now that she is almost 3 months she is sleeping almost 6 hours and im letting it go....only happens about once a day and that is after she has had 30+ oz of formula

[Cassandrajane]

I hopes soo! :)..

And I might wake him every 4 - 5 hrs if he doesnt wake up for the first 2 - 3 weeks... Like you, I'm a paranoiddddd one! LOL...But then knownin my luck he'll get used to it haha.
I poked him in the head again now he isnt happy. LOL... John has worked out a way to hide his murmur from like Medical exams where he is a bus driver... although it doesnt effect him anymore.. (It used too) if they found it, he wouldnt have a Job. (Hence why his dad doesnt know either)... And as for his brother, John taught him how to hide his for the medical for being  bus driver.. (Breathing a certain way or something...) and they miss the missed beat and stuff! Crafty little bugger.

I have BP issues, I've always been low proper low. Better Low than High in pregnancy right??

I hope everything iis okayy :), I have another scan in aout 3 weeks, so I will ask them to check?? Can they check with a US?

x

[Ashelen]

it will be just fine sweetie :). Like I said I woke mine up for the first 2-3 wks but not because I had to...it just made me feel better, you know? babies will let you know when you're hungry...I was just paranoid.

I was born with a heart murmur that went away and my dad has one that doesn't affect him..I have a slightly leaky valve which causes tachycardia and BP issues but other than that it's essentially harmless....so I think Mister Harry will be just fine :)

[Cassandrajane]

I think, if he is perfect  well for him right weight healthy, I will leave him... but if he needs waking up to feed (Like a little underweight, then every 4 hrs, but premature then every 2-3) depending on his weight, He is pretty big apprently for my size and eating and health... he is healthier than me! LOL.. I just dont want to seem like I am neglecting him or anything... I shall depend on his Health at birth... That should be alright, right??

Ashelen - I was away Saturmaday. And Kinda on / off on Sunday cause even though my mum was home, I was still looking after my brother and sister. But there is a Journal Up about my Midwife apt friday... What a day Anti D shots really sting.!!!

And as for the Murmur, I will remind them when he is born... and see if they detect something and go from there. It was just a wory because his dad has one...Men.. make everything difficult. But John is fine! I just dont want anything happening to Harry... LOL..

Thank you guys!!

xx

[jenkaye21]

You have had a lot of great resopnses, I will answer just two. = )

I have NEVER EVER EVER woke up a baby to eat.  Are they crazy??  Those are rare emnough moments, truct me, baby will wake when he is hungry.

About heart murmurs, many babies have them at birth, and they usually grow out of them.  All four of the kids in my family had one at birth, and they went away in a few years for all but me (I have moderate Mitral Valve Prolapse, but it doesn't affect my daily life.)  It can be scary for a new mom to hear, but usually is not a big deal.  My sister even had a small hole in heart at birth (!), which caused my mom to panic -of course- but it completely went away on its own.

[Ashelen]

hey baby girl how have I missed you all weekend? we must have been on different times..

anyway....I only woke my babies up for the first 2-3wks...after that as long as they slept between feedings was up to them. :) you got some really good advice/experience here but I remind you as I've said before...trust yourself. you'll know what's right..some people feel more comfortable waking them up, some don't...whatever makes you feel best and like you're doing the right thing IS the right thing for you.

[BeautifulMistake2010]

As far as waking baby..... I don't wake baby at all! 4 hr mark or not.. When baby is hungry baby will wake up... Don't force it...

[Shayne1989]

DS was born with a heart murmer and still has it and is almost 2 but it hasnt caused him any of problems. they checked it when he was born and then they will again when he's about 4. Alot of people are born with heart murmers that never go away and never end up having to have surgery for them. They just told us to watch DS when he's playing alot and see if he gets tired easier then he should and is getting out of breath easily. So far he's all good and like some of the others have said alot of times it will go away on its own and the doc should be able to hear it before Harry is ever born so I wouldnt worry about it unless your ob hears it at one of your appts.

[jessimika]

My daughter had a heart murmur when she was born and I was told all babies have a hole in their heart causing the murmur but it closes right around the time of birth. Hers didn't close so I had to take her to the cardiologist every 6 months  to monitor it. She went from a 80% chance of eventually needing surgery to a 5% chance in 6 months and by 2 it was completely closed. It definitely isn't something to worry about now and his Dr will be able to hear it and let you know if it needs monitoring or not

[Clysta]

I personally don't let Kylie go over 4 hours sleeping or not because once she went longer, and when she woke up she was desperately hungry and crying and had troubles latching. She was shaking her head too frantically to get it. Once your baby is born you'll figure out what works for them.

[Cassandrajane]

Im talkin about when they are asleep... because I dont wanna wake him up and then him be all grumpy.. unless he NEEDS to be. And I cant BF.. I have only produced in one side and cause of my anorexia they now thin ill lose toooo much weight. So when I gain weight and keep it on and dont relaspe for about a year and a half or longer, I can BF with the next ones (Not that I am planning it) but I cant with Harry Bum.

but when he is awake, I will feed him like every 4 hrs and stuff... but I was wondering at night when he is sleeping... LOL... cause if he is like John and gets woken up, Oh my goodness... he will be GRUMPYY!

x

[Cassandrajane]

I have come to the conclusion... if he is healthy and a good weight, I wont wake him up... unless I am told otherwise, I will wait for him to wake me up.
(If im asleep)

And with the placenta you give birth to it so another baby can have a new one, rightyy ho!

I feel him move, its just changed, and then I read that and panicked! Oh they shouldn't write that stuff... they make people scared.

I mentioned it to the Health Visitor (Found out why I had one before he was born.. cause they dont come untill after, they take over the midwifes role.).. and she said ' Hmmmm, okay. ' And didnt answer me or anything.. and it's something I wondered about. It was also mentioned at the start with the booking in apt'.. But I will tell them again, and see if they can do a check once he is born..and they will read it in my notes? Because I thought if he had an irregular heartbeat/murmur they can detect it now... but my doc said they cant.

x

[mom2ariana]

yeah they should be able to detect it.
my pediatrician told me 2 hours if you breastfeed, 4 if formula fed. but when they are sleeping not to wake them. but i think thats the general rule for when they are awake, no matter what you do at night.
but like smjmekg said, they will let you know when they are hungry.
first night ariana was home she slept 6 hours in a row...i didn't wake her to feed. its up to mommy. :)

[Cassandrajane]

Johns murmur is normal and doesnt cause problems any more... But he isnt supposed to go on rollercoasters and things like this and still does. But Im sure Harry will be fine, and if its noted will keep an eye on it?? I hope!

So every 2 hrs isnt necesarry (Sp) if he is a healthy weight and unless I am told otherwise, but every 4 hrs is recommended?

I will bring his movement up with my doctor.. He has been moving, just less. Considering he used to pretty much be awake from 7 am till 9pm... with little breaks. But he was a non stop mover, then slept when I slept.. I think, I dunoo I was asleeep.

I will bring the Heart Murmur up after the birth, Can they detect it that early??

x

[smjmekg]

1. I agree with mom2ariana. Your placenta is formed while the baby is forming. Here's a site that mentions it...

http://3dpregnancy     .parentsconnect.      com/calendar      /3-weeks-pregnant.html

2. http://www.justmommies.        com/articles/        effacement-and-dilation.shtml
Second paragraph under "What is cervical effacement" there is a part in "()" that says "If a woman is having her first baby, her cervix will probably efface before it dilates; in subsequent pregnancies the cervix may dilate first, then efface."

3. Agreeing with mom2ariana again, you'll get a lot of different opinions on how often to feed. When Elijah was first born, I stayed in the hospital three nights after my c-section and was told to wake him up every three hours and give him one ounce. WELL come to find out (he wasn't gaining weight for 1 1/2 weeks) I could give him MORE than an ounce...(I've been around babies before but always had a mom tell me how much the little one ate, lol I had NO clue how much to give Elijah and I was trying to only supplement and breast feed, but ended up only being able to formula feed.) SO after I found out I could give him more than one ounce, I was giving him about three, because he would eat that much at first, and whenever he woke up hungry. MY PERSONAL motto: He'll eat when he's hungry. It worked for me, and I never had an issue...I didn't look at the clock to see how long it had been, if he was hungry (after a while you'll know his cry when he's hungry) I'd feed him. It could be anywhere from two hours between to five/six. He was gaining weight and fine, so I was happy and never got told anything different.

4. He may sleep when you do, but he's still being rocked to sleep during the day. I've read that a newborn is only awake about three hours total a day, and honestly that's not that far off from how long Elijah was awake during the day, so he's probably just sleeping. PLUS he's gonna start getting tighter and tighter in there because he runs out of room. The whole "ten times an hour" is really for when he's active. If he's asleep for two hours, of course you're not going to feel him move. BUT if you're really worried about it, try poking him and see if he moves, lay on your left side and drink some ice cold water, or something a little sweet and see if you can get him going.

My appointment in Sept Miss No-name's heat beat was in the 170's at first and then dropped to the 150/160s...just like your pulse rate doesn't stay the same every minute of every day, baby's won't either, as long as it's in the normal range I wouldn't worry.

5. You might want to mention it to your midwife, and ask her to see his pediatrician before he's born, or to have a consult with one when he does come out. They might be able to get a cardiologist/pediatrician in the room once you deliver, or just check him out while he's in the hospital. I'm not sure the possibility of him having a murmur too, but I would mention it at your next appointment if you haven't already, and then remind her when you get further along.

[LosingMyMindInGA]

1. as Mom2Ariana said, the placenta develops with the baby and a new one grows with each pregnancy.

2. effaced is the THINNING of the cervix, dialation is the OPENING of it.

3.  I've never woken any of my babies as newborns unless they were about to go over the 4 hour mark without eating.

4. You aren't going to feel him move every hour, just as we have  periods of rest, so do babies, but if you have noticed a decrease or change in his movement, it's always wise to bring it up to your doc

5. It's hard to say, This is something *I* personally wouldn't worry about until after birth.

[NicoleW09]

I wanted to add that I was born with a heart murmur. It was considered an innocent murmur, meaning that it wouldn't cause me any trouble. I had an echocardiogram at 17 to check on it, and it was still there. I had one at the beginning of this pregnancy to be safe and it had corrected itsself. There is a chance he will have a murmur, but his ped will inform you that he has one and let you know if it is innocent or requires some form of treatment/monitoring.

[Cassandrajane]

If he is underweight/premature or does need to gain weight then I will.. but If I dont NEED too I wont, and he can wake up himself! But I dont wanna starve him, just wanted to know if thats right.. I didnt wanna seem I was neglecting him either.. just depends on his weight and health I guess...

Was I right with the effaced and Dilating thing, Effaced is there the cervix is soft or whatever


Ive seen a Health Visitor and she noted it and went 'Hmmmm Okay'. ALOT OF HELP! didnt answer my question when I asked her!! And him and his brother Randomly have one.. his mum doesnt and neither does his dad, neither do my parents (They are just old!..)

Oh this pregnancy stuff is confusing...

and NO my brother asks STUPID questions... in the vets the other day, he asked why animals poo!!!
Bless him...

xx

[mom2ariana]

1. the placenta develops with baby...you don't always have a placenta in your uterus...when the baby attaches the the uterine wall after conception, the placenta forms.

2. i KNOW you can be effaced without being dialated. and im fairly sure you can be dialated without being effaced.

3. you're going to get different answers here, but i never woke ariana up to eat. they wake up when they are hungry. and if you wake the baby up you will have a very angry little boy on your hands. but its up to the mommy :) or if he is underweight the doc might want you to.

4. any heartbeat between 110-160 is normal and healthy. babies heartrates rise and fall constantly in the womb. its normal for it to go from 110 to 160 within a matter of seconds, and it just depends on what it was the moment the midwife listened :) the next second it was probably 145 or it could have been 160. that means harry is healthy :)

5. it depends on his parents and your parents, but its probably a 25% chance. i'd just ask harry's pediatrician..are you gonna meet with the pediatrician before he's born?

and they're not stupid questions; there's no such thing!!! :)