Aa
so stressed. my dad tried to commit suicide today
many of you know that the last year has been very hard. my husband and i have gone through 4 miscarraiges, and we are now ttc again. i haven't had contact with my parents in years. my mother suffers from bipolar disorder and has other mental illnesses, and my father has severe depression. both of my parents are on drugs. i have a younger brother who is 16 who i have been trying to get away from them. today, my dad put a gun to his head in the living room of my parents home (in front of my young brother and mother), and tried to kill himself. the last i heard he was on lock down for a psychiatric evaluation at the hospital.
even though i am not able to have a relationship with them because of the choices they have made, i still love them because they are my parents. don't get me wrong, my mother is a dragon from hell, and she pushed my dad to this. i'm just so sad for him. i wish things were different.
even though i am not able to have a relationship with them because of the choices they have made, i still love them because they are my parents. don't get me wrong, my mother is a dragon from hell, and she pushed my dad to this. i'm just so sad for him. i wish things were different.
Oh i see well you are very lucky to have her then!! Me and my grandma always argued when i was teenager and when i was 19 i ran off here to TX where i live now!! My great grandma passed away 2yrs ago and my grandma she just hasnt been the same since. When i try to call and chk on her and my mom she always ask me to call bk cus shes talking to some1 else!! its kinda of a let down so i just stop calling i hate the rejection!! I keep hearing that i think it is true!!
i am very lucky that my grandmother and i are very close. anyone will tell you she is just awesome. she might be 70 but she doesnt act or look it! shes like a best friend and i can talk to her about anything. she doesnt have anything to do with my mother either. it *****, because i wish they could be normal and we could have a relationship. but i always tell myself God doesnt give us more than we can handle.
Oh man so sorry!! My mom is exactly the same she has bi-polar and other stuff wrong too so i know how hard it can be!! i was always angry as a child i didnt a normal mom just a grandma to drive me crazy!! it can be a tough road but dont worry all us girls are here to support!! If you need to vent im definetly here!! I know its hard but you really have to just live your own life! i care about my mom but my relationship with my grandma seems to be slipping even more now than ever b4 so im having little contact with them too!!
i'm so sorry you have to go through this.....as for your brother, he has really just adapted their outlook towards you, and maybe when he finally realizes what's up and leaves, he'll be more equipped to talk to you about it all.....as for your dad, well...idk what to say except that's ALOT for someone your age to go through.....as for your mom, who says she wished she'd aborted you....well, it's always the moms whose children actually make a life, that they say that too...because you got away from it, and reliazed she wasn't right all the time, so to her, you've betrayed her, and she's jealous of your life....that's not your fault, that's hers.....i know it's hard but just hang in there...and we're all here anytime you need to talk, in case none of us didn't already know that ;)
martikadragoon-i'm sry for your loss as well--in 2000, i had a friend shoot himself with a shotgun, and he did it while his dad and sister(who then was like 14 or 15)were in the house...that was 1 of very few time's i'd have to say it wasn't his fault....everytime he tried to get "better", they'd ridicule him for it, and his sister had apparently told his girlfriend she'd caught him with another guy...so when our friend proposed in front of other friends, she flat out said no, and told him why and then left.....i've never ever liked his sister, and never knew he had an older brother....until in 2004 when i lived at home, and that skeezy sl*tty little girl was sitting on my moms couch, going to play pool w/mom and her b/f did i realize my moms bf's best friend was my friends older brother....i've never disrespected ANYONE in my moms house, esp her or her bf's friends...but they kept sitting there calling him a f@g, how he was a loser for killing himself, how upset she was that she walked in and found him(she did!)...i took 1 look @ my mom, said "sorry" and before she could "finalize" her look of confusion, started screaming and cussing to high h*ll, and told them i didnt give a f**** whose friends they were, to get OUT of MY house, and wait for them in the ROAD.....when my mom realized who they were talking about b/c she couldnt remember their brother(until i explained it to her), she told them that from now on they weren't welcome at the house, and told her bf to meet them somewhere else from then on(my mom realized she'd worked with their brother and though he was "off" he was a wholey nice person, who did everything to please EVERYONE ELSE).....jeez, he was the 1st guy to give me flowers!!! lol yea, i mentioned it walking home from work together, and an hour later he showed up with roses he'd picked from his moms garden for me! it wasn't like "that" he just thought it *crazy* that at 17, i'd never gotten flowers from a guy i wasn't related to! lol...jeez, i still remember that convo to this day!
martikadragoon-i'm sry for your loss as well--in 2000, i had a friend shoot himself with a shotgun, and he did it while his dad and sister(who then was like 14 or 15)were in the house...that was 1 of very few time's i'd have to say it wasn't his fault....everytime he tried to get "better", they'd ridicule him for it, and his sister had apparently told his girlfriend she'd caught him with another guy...so when our friend proposed in front of other friends, she flat out said no, and told him why and then left.....i've never ever liked his sister, and never knew he had an older brother....until in 2004 when i lived at home, and that skeezy sl*tty little girl was sitting on my moms couch, going to play pool w/mom and her b/f did i realize my moms bf's best friend was my friends older brother....i've never disrespected ANYONE in my moms house, esp her or her bf's friends...but they kept sitting there calling him a f@g, how he was a loser for killing himself, how upset she was that she walked in and found him(she did!)...i took 1 look @ my mom, said "sorry" and before she could "finalize" her look of confusion, started screaming and cussing to high h*ll, and told them i didnt give a f**** whose friends they were, to get OUT of MY house, and wait for them in the ROAD.....when my mom realized who they were talking about b/c she couldnt remember their brother(until i explained it to her), she told them that from now on they weren't welcome at the house, and told her bf to meet them somewhere else from then on(my mom realized she'd worked with their brother and though he was "off" he was a wholey nice person, who did everything to please EVERYONE ELSE).....jeez, he was the 1st guy to give me flowers!!! lol yea, i mentioned it walking home from work together, and an hour later he showed up with roses he'd picked from his moms garden for me! it wasn't like "that" he just thought it *crazy* that at 17, i'd never gotten flowers from a guy i wasn't related to! lol...jeez, i still remember that convo to this day!
thanks so much to everyone.
i havent talked to my parents since 2004. my dad hates my husband and he doesnt even know him. he showed up at my husbands job trying to fight him, so my husbands job called the police. its just very sad. my mother and father abused me growing up, and my mother always told me that she wished she had aborted me (i know, real nice right?) my grandmother pretty much raised me. my brother told me he hopes i die. my parents havent had my brother in school in about 6 years, so all he knows is what goes on in their home. when i am around them they make me so miserable. no one in my family has anything to do with them. i saw my brother briefly at the pet store last year and i didnt even recognize him. i know none of this makes any sense, and it is insane. i love them so much, but i cannot be around them. i pray for them everyday.
i havent talked to my parents since 2004. my dad hates my husband and he doesnt even know him. he showed up at my husbands job trying to fight him, so my husbands job called the police. its just very sad. my mother and father abused me growing up, and my mother always told me that she wished she had aborted me (i know, real nice right?) my grandmother pretty much raised me. my brother told me he hopes i die. my parents havent had my brother in school in about 6 years, so all he knows is what goes on in their home. when i am around them they make me so miserable. no one in my family has anything to do with them. i saw my brother briefly at the pet store last year and i didnt even recognize him. i know none of this makes any sense, and it is insane. i love them so much, but i cannot be around them. i pray for them everyday.
Dont take it hard on yourself. Just pray.. We're always here to listen..hugs & prayers..
wow i thought my parents were bad honey i think u should have contact with ur parents exp ur dad maybe its depressed that he doesnt talk or see u much i know my parents exp my dad would be
Im sorry about whats going on. I always tell my hubby when there is issues at his parents that they might be family and all but really there is nothing you can do. Dont take it hard on yourself. There is enough you have to worry about on your end at is. You trying to start your ow family and maybe other things we dont know about. The only thing i would try is try to get your little brother out of that enviroment. Your in my thoughts and prayers.
I'm really sorry for what your family is going thru. I want to tell you something but please dont get offended or mad.
Personally I think that if a person makes the decision to kill themselves there's nothing anyone can do to stop them. It's a choice a person makes on they're own even if sometimes it's a rather hasty one.
I say this because I had a friend in High school who killed herself shortly after her 18th birthday the year we graduated. She had a history of attempts and was a serious cutter or self mutilator.
This all started when her father kidnapped her stepfather, took him out to the hills around here, tortured and murdered him. the father blamed the mother (he was jealous) but my friend blamed herself. The father hung himself in prison.
Her and I became friends and got closer when she slashed her arm w/an exacto knife. so deep you could see the fat, but somehow she luckily missed the artery. I was the friend who took her to the nurse at school and made up a little story about it (which the nurse saw thru of course) and waited til her grandma picked her up. She went thru a YEAR of psychiatric hospitals and doctors and treatments. We thought she was getting better, but she still cut. When she came back to school she thanked me for helping her and caring enough to try and keep her from hurting herself.
When she finally ended her life she wrote a note to her family and OD'd on medications. The odd thing behind all this... I kind of always sort of knew she'd take her life one day. because she was still depressed and guilt ridden. I do believe she was bipolar too and on meds. but what all us friends knew in the end was that we couldn't have done anything more than we did. Try to keep her happy when she was around us as her friends. SHE was the one who could not get past her demons, and SHE was the one who couldn't handle her pain.. it was her decision in the end.
Personally I think that if a person makes the decision to kill themselves there's nothing anyone can do to stop them. It's a choice a person makes on they're own even if sometimes it's a rather hasty one.
I say this because I had a friend in High school who killed herself shortly after her 18th birthday the year we graduated. She had a history of attempts and was a serious cutter or self mutilator.
This all started when her father kidnapped her stepfather, took him out to the hills around here, tortured and murdered him. the father blamed the mother (he was jealous) but my friend blamed herself. The father hung himself in prison.
Her and I became friends and got closer when she slashed her arm w/an exacto knife. so deep you could see the fat, but somehow she luckily missed the artery. I was the friend who took her to the nurse at school and made up a little story about it (which the nurse saw thru of course) and waited til her grandma picked her up. She went thru a YEAR of psychiatric hospitals and doctors and treatments. We thought she was getting better, but she still cut. When she came back to school she thanked me for helping her and caring enough to try and keep her from hurting herself.
When she finally ended her life she wrote a note to her family and OD'd on medications. The odd thing behind all this... I kind of always sort of knew she'd take her life one day. because she was still depressed and guilt ridden. I do believe she was bipolar too and on meds. but what all us friends knew in the end was that we couldn't have done anything more than we did. Try to keep her happy when she was around us as her friends. SHE was the one who could not get past her demons, and SHE was the one who couldn't handle her pain.. it was her decision in the end.
is so sad what you have said... please be strong and remember that both your parents have mental health illnesses so can not really be blamed for their actions... is good that you are there to support them when needed specially your younger brother.. best of luck with trying for a baby i hope it all works okay for you this time...
dont put all the pressure on yourself to get your brother out of the house. you are obviously stressed and your body is showing it. remember, your brother is 16 and he's old enough to make his own choices in life. perhaps this situation will make him more willing to listen to your point of view. suggest to him an alternative and see what he thinks of it now. he might feel guilty for your dad and might say he wants to stay so he can help deal with your mom. remind him that your father isn't his responsibility and he obviously needs more help than your brother can offer. but if in the end he chooses to stay with your parents then there isn't much you can do and dont beat yourself up about it.
my little brother has cerebral palsey and his twin is normal. they are six years younger than me but i still feel really bad for the twin. he is always having to babysit and take care of him, they're 17 now and they still play together, he feels too guilty to not entertain him. my entire family has gone through that feeling and its really hard to get yourself out of feeling that way. hopefully now, with this big situation, your brother will see what is best for him.
as for you, try to focus on your future and what you want. i know its hard to focus when things like that are happening. but your dad is getting help now and hopefully things will be different. just remember to take some YOU time out of your day and hopefully that stress level goes down a bit.
good luck and i feel for you
my little brother has cerebral palsey and his twin is normal. they are six years younger than me but i still feel really bad for the twin. he is always having to babysit and take care of him, they're 17 now and they still play together, he feels too guilty to not entertain him. my entire family has gone through that feeling and its really hard to get yourself out of feeling that way. hopefully now, with this big situation, your brother will see what is best for him.
as for you, try to focus on your future and what you want. i know its hard to focus when things like that are happening. but your dad is getting help now and hopefully things will be different. just remember to take some YOU time out of your day and hopefully that stress level goes down a bit.
good luck and i feel for you
I feel so incredibly bad for your family, sweetie. Here's a big E-HUG and I hope things get better from here on out. I also hope you can get your brother out of there. How old is he?
Wow, that must be stressful for you and you must really worry about your brother, you definataly need to get him out of that household if he's gonna have a chance at life
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