venting and question help would be appreciated!

[newuser82]

Hello ladies i dont post here much but i follow everyones ups and downs.I think you are a great bunch of ladies who are so supportive of each other and make people feel like there not alone.In advance thankyou.
I posted here before about my cycles being all messed up.I had a chmical pregnancy last aug and ever since my period is coming a week later than week before.Ive been trying to concieve my second coming up to a year in august.I know it can take longer but i just assumed because i already have one child it would be so easy to go again.Im having a really hard few days everyone around me seems to be getting pregnant and there not even trying.I try not to think about it too much but its hard not too.I was pregnant with my first along with 2 other girls and they are both pregnant with there 2nd again and im sick of people telling me oh it will be you next you better start trying and catch up(if only they knew)I have been to my gyno about 6 months ago for my yearly pap and she said everything seemed fine when i told her my concerns.

the lenght of my cycles since feb are 39 days 37 days 29 days 32 days and at moment its now 33+ days im still waiting on af to arrive.I did a test this am and it was bfn.Do you think this looks like normal cycle or what should i do to help me concieve.I hope this is not too confusing and thanks in advance for your help

[JoyRenee]

It's definitely normal to be irregular after a loss, but that was almost a year ago. The most reliable test to determine if you're ovulating is a progesterone test. Your doctor can test your progesterone a week after the time you believe you ovulated (they usually test on CD21 but if your cycles are longer, then obviously you might not get an accurate result).

If you ovulate your progesterone will be elevated!

From there you can begin charting your cycles. BBT method has too many variables and OPKs don't seem to work for everyone. My method of choice is the cervical mucous changes to determine ovulation and fertility.

[findinghumility]

You would take your temp first thing in the morning when waking up.  For accuracy the time should be the same everyday within 1/2 hour either way.  So if you set a 8am temp time you should take it between 7:30am and 8:30am otherwise make a note if it's at a different time.  Walmart has special Basal Body Thermometers (BBT) for like $10 that go to the hundreth place, but as long as you have a digital thermometer that goes to .1 like 98.7 etc. that is fine.  Just be sure to use the same thermometer every day.  Also lots of these thermometers save the last temp automatically so if it's the weekend just take the temp at your time and go back to sleep.  You can record it later when you get up.  No drinking or eating before temping.  Preferably just wake up and take your temp right away.  Also note any illness or bad sleeping nights where you get less then 5 hours etc.  Here are a couple of websites that have downloadable charts for temping.  I would also make any notes regarding cervical mucus if you notice any even if you aren't normally going to chart it. Or times when you have a very slippery feeling, like you need to wipe more then once after going to the bathroom. (sorry if tmi)

http://www.storknet.com/cubbies/preconception/bbt.htm

http://www.babyhopes.com/articles/bbt-chart.html

Also if you want to add me as a friend or something and you do start charting I can give you my e-mail to send me your chart if you'd like once you get going.  I am certified and teach the sympto-thermal method of fertility awareness meaning charting cervical mucus, temperature and cervix signs etc. That being said even as an instructor we can't diagnose per-se but we can certainly point you in the direction of what to talk to your doctor about and what tests may be a good idea.  Take care!

[newuser82]

Thankyou so much for your reply.Im due my af any day now so i am going to start using opks to find out how long my lutheal phase is.I really hope im ovulating and just need to track when it is.Thankyou for your offer for help.Quick question how do i go about charting my temp what way does that work

[findinghumility]

If you are still getting your period, you should be ovulating although it is obviously irregular.  I agree with the previous poster about getting OPK's or learning how to chart your fertility signs meaning cervical mucus and basal body temp.  The more signs you include the more accurate the information is in pinpointing ovulation.  Typically it is the time prior to ovulation that is changing.  Once you ovulate it should be about the same number of days from ovulation until af.  This is called your Luteal phase.  If this is less then 10 days this could also be a factor in your trouble to conceive and can often be remedied with a progesterone supplement. Also if you are temping regularly and the temps are very low (below 96.7 I think...I have to check) this can indicate a thyroid problem.  What I'm getting at is there is a lot of extra information that can be gained as to why you are having trouble conceiving if you are willing to learn how to chart and get into the habit of doing it.  In the very least an OPK would allow you to check out luteal phase length as if that is too short implantation can not occur.  Also having the first part of your cycle shorten and lengthen so much could be due to a number of things ranging from stress or illness, to weak hormones.  Much of which again can be seen from charting.  Good luck to you!  Let me know if you do decide to chart and have any questions.  Take care!

[newuser82]

Grandmatobe

the last time i remember ovulating was May because i had some pain on my right side and i had the sticky egg like discharge sorry if tmi.So we bedded that day then 2 days later my af arrived.Im going to talk to my doctor about the progesterone shot.Thank you for your feedback i really appreciate it xx

Markitadragoon

Thankyou too for your advice  i never thought of doing opks.As i said i keep trying not to think of it and maybe it will just happen as everyone says.Im defenitely going to look up about the opks and see which ones i can afford and get them.At least this way i will be able to tell when im ovulating because to be honest i wouldnt know if i was or not.As i said to grandmatobe the last time i remember ovulating we bd and 2 days later my af arrived.Thanks again for your advice i really appreciate it.

Its so hard to talk to people even my partner they just dont understand and because its only been a year they think its premature for me to be worrying about this.Its great to have women here who understand what im talking about xxxxx

[martikadragoon]

It sounds like your not ovulating regularly. Pregnancy, even a chemical one messes your period up. Before my son my periods were every 29 days, After my son my periods were anywhere from 29-37 days.You need to start using OPK's or Ovulation Predictor Kits/tests.

If you have the money to invest I'd suggest the Clear Blue Digital kit, it tests for the presence of 2 different hormones I believe.  Or if you don't have the funds, you can get a BUNCH rather cheap from Amazon.com, and they come with a few early pregnancy tests as well.

You may even have to use them 2x a day, once in morning once in evening because you can miss your hormone surge. the instructions that come with it say 1x a day, but if you go to peeonastick.com or if it doesn't show up on my post all at once,  (peeonastick . com) (without the spaces), the woman who made that site has done all sorts of expiraments with them and found that if she didn't use them 2x a day she'd miss her window. And since your cycles vary so much I'd suggest you begin using them 7 days after your period starts rather than 10-14 days after.


Another tip I have is to BD (make love) every other day if your man is up to it. Because every day will deplete his reserves of sperm.

You can also use "preseed" lubricant, it is a great lube because it provides a perfect environment for the little swimmers to go where they're needed.   It took me 2 cycles to try, and the ONLY reason I even conceived was because we bd'd for fun right when I ovulated and I didn't know it. I didn't have the money at the time to buy enough OPK's to take 2x a day, because I would need at least 20-30 a month.  

When I got my BFP with this second baby, I had tested that entire week using FMU and gotten nothing but BFN's. I used EPT's Clear Blue's and $$ store an walmart brands.

The day I got my BFP I decided to try one last time for the h*ll of it, and I POAS first thing in the morning. When it came up pregnant I was SO suprised. I had tested BFN the evening before.
It turned out that I ovulated a 5-7 days later than I originally thought so instead of being 17DPO as I thought when I got my BFP I was really 12dpo. The doctor tried telling me in the beginning that I was measuring on the small side, but I knew after my 1st U/S when I'd really ovulated (the day I thought I had implantation cramps, they were O cramps). So instead of being due on 12/19 12/20 I knew I was due 12/25 and the last 2 U/S's have confirmed it.  By the way, my Blood test indicated my hormone levels were only at 27mlu the day I got my BFP. So just over the thresh hold for a positive. My levels were at 344 the next time my blood was tested 8 days later.

Good luck!

[Grandmatobe]

If your cycles are all over the place, it would be difficult to know when you ovulate, if you are ovulating at all.  Are you using the OPK's to help you out?  Is there any possibility that you stopped ovulating and need a shot of progesterone to get it back on track?  That happened to me when I was trying to get pg with my second.  Stopped a pack of BC pills in the middle, and it screwed up my whole system.  Once I got the shot, I got pg the following month.

Just something else to consider, but I hope things work out soon.  It must be very frustrating and disappointing...