Vaginal tears

[CountryMomToBe]

Dumb question... Is there a way to "condition" your vagina to reduce the chance of vaginal tearing? I'm having a home birth so I'm not planning on being sliced for an episiotomy? Spelling? But I also haven't discussed this issue with my midwife yet.

So my question... Can having sex more or having my husband stretch it out more with his fingers help? Fingers might be a bad idea actually... But I mean should I just be doing more kegals?

Sorry, I know it's dumb... But my biggest fear for the entire labor process is not the pain per say, but rather getting torn apart. Lol

If you do tear, how long does it take to heal? And more importantly when can you have sex and what is it like afterwards? Is it painful?

[k_ann_]

I needed an episiotomy because I was tearing very early into pushing with my first. I only pushed for 25 minutes (no epidural, so that could account for some of the decreased push time), but I think that's why my doctor felt it necessary to cut. The stitches were not great, but you might get them either way? Unless they don't normally stitch for tearing. I used perineal massage beforehand but not for long periods of time, so that certainly would be worth a shot. And for post partum sex, I don't think the episiotomy had much to do with my discomfort. Eventually things for my husband and I were better than before, just took longer than the 6 weeks of healing.

[Sergia]

I teared and got stitches like  Angela but mine took longer to heal about 2 wks and then even after 4 months it hurts to have intercourse.  I didn't know there were ways to keep from tearing , I should try some I'll be 38 wks on Saturday really would rather avoid any tearing

[oneluckymama]

I had a pain free delivery thanks to an epidural,  but once that wore off I was in a lot of pain! I tore quite a bit. I am a big wuss though and I didn't take any pain medication for the first 6 hours after delivery. It seems like it took a week or two to feel better when sitting. As for sex, I was very uncomfortable for a few months.

[CountryMomToBe]

Cool, I'll order some evening primrose oil.  I looked up perineal massage and it said to do the massage with Vitamin E oil.  Is that what you all used as well? Or simply the evening primrose?

[AngelaAdams]

I tore with my first. They stitch you up. And you do go right back to normal. I don't remover being in pain. The stitches dissolve on their own. You might be a little sore for a day or two. But nothing major. The tearing isn't what hurts really. For me, it was the pushing that was the most painful out of the whole labor process. Good Luck tho!

[joyfullmommyof3]

O yes I had her at exactly 38 weeks help thin out my cervix alot and my water broke!

[joyfullmommyof3]

Yes evening primrose oil ..works wonders I used it when I was prego with my daughter but I took it at 36 weeks by vagina and always have lots of sex .I did tear an inch and it did hurt but I plan on taking it alit early this time like 34 weeks so I can start massaging ..hope it all.goes well fot you everyone is diff

[CountryMomToBe]

Excellent! Thank you so much!

[pooklet123]

Perineal massage, using evening primrose oil.  

[hthompson1228]

I agree with the above post.. I have never done them but what I have read a lot of midwifes prefer it

[Mrscrow1]

Look up perineal massaging. I've heard that helps.