Venting...bleeding and bed rest

[jenandrandal]

Sorry to vent but I'm angry....I was in the er last Saturday and stayed in the hospital over night. I had begun bleeding from a fibroid that's covering  80% of my cervix. They think since she's sitting real low she pushed hard enough on it to make it bleed. Well it also caused contractions and was 1cm dilated by Sunday morning. That was at 33 weeks, I'm 34 now...they sent me home Sunday evening after we finally got the bleeding to stop, I was given a steroid shot Sunday and went back Monday for the second one. They said bed rest,slightly modified as I have 3 kids at homd, but nothing strenuous...none food shopping, regular cleaning, no picking up my 19 month old unless absolutely necessary....until I hit 36 weeks. Then were in the clear to deliver.
Well today my hubby is talking to my dad at work and my dad tells my hubby that him and my mom (who hasn't helped with anything since I was put on bed rest) think that I'm doing this for attention.
Like wtf?? Are you kidding me?? I have never been the attention seeker in my family and never ask for help unless I'm desperate....who in their right mind would make something like that up??? Hubby was at the hospital with me the whole time, my girls friend rushed over at 2am to take the kids so we could go....and what obgyn puts you on bed rest for no reason, it's always healthier to be moving around if your physically in condition to do so.
How could my own parents say something like that...im beyond upset and hubby is extremely angry. I just dont understand...this is why I have always had a more distant relationship with my parents....sorry this is so long I'm just so beyond upset and frustrated.

[jenandrandal]

Thank you ladies!!! It's definitely sad but am grateful for who I do have. My hubby is seeing more and more why I struggle with trust and abandonment issues lol poor guy. Not a lot happens to me that I need help like this so he hasn't gotten to really see a whole lot of this side of my family. Definitely glad I have him and his family, and of course my best friend.

[kerml78]

I'm glad you have a good support system, but sorry it can't be from your own parents. I'm in a similar situation with my parents that live 2 minutes from me. Friends more reliable than them. Tensions high between them and hubby too. Follow dr's orders. Count your blessings.

[jen0221]

Wow! They sure sound like winners :( . I'm so sorry you have to go through that. It would be so hard to not have the support from the ones who are supposed to love you the most. At least you have your in laws and you friend to help support you.

[happiMom87]

Oh my, I'm sorry for them they'll miss out on a lot.. and thank god for your in laws your friend and your hubby.

[jenandrandal]

Jen0021-my hubby is angry my dad said what he said. Actually I think he was more angry then I was. Sad part is I have 3 sisters, if any one of them has an issue even something as small as my older sister having wisdom teeth out...my parents drop everything to go help her with the kids etc...I have three at home, hinges is 19 months, hubby works mostly 12 hour days,  and I was told...."ooh my schedule is so choppy we will have to see" fine, so I haven't asked them for anything. My in laws have been a huge help and my best friend has been willing to drive an hour here after work to help out, my parents live 10 minutes away. But yes to hear my dad even said something like that is just disappointing and it makes me sad. But they wonder why I keep an arms length between us...this isn't new behavior from them so I guess I should have expected it. These are the same people who when my first hubby walked out on my daughters and I, they stopped talking to me and would invite him over for holidays etc....

[ecilef]

I can totally relate  on this. When i was still 16weeks my dr put me on complete bedrest. No lifting, minimal movement and just lay on bed as much as possible. My relatives thought that i was just being lazy and that it was just all in my head and that there's no such thing as not doing anything. They told me to get up walk execrise get out of the house. They even told me that i was put on bed rest because i lack on walking outside. Like seriously? I was put on bed rest cos i was having cramps at the early stage. To make the matter much worse the one who was so much to say about me doesnt even have a child and still didnt experience being pregnant. What i could say to you is dony mind them. I know it really hurts to hear such thing but believe me they will just add up your stress which is bad for your condition now. You know your body and you are the one who's carrying so they dont have the rights to judge you.

[jen0221]

Is your hubby angry that he thinks you are making it up or that your parents said that? Hopefully the first!! I'm sorry to hear that. Sometimes parents don't know all the struggles because they themselves never had that particular thing happen. My bff's mom apparently had picture perfect pregnancies with no symptoms and no complications. My friend has had about everything in the book from having a hard time conceiving due to endo to sick as a dog with no energy and ultimately having preterm babies. She said that she can't call and talk to her mom about certain things because she just doesn't understand and blows it off like nothing. It's unfortunate when they can't show even slight sympathy for a situation, even if they did think it was just to appease you. I have to show sympathy for my sil when she goes to the doctor, even though someone in her family is at the doc, if not the emergency room, at least 1-2 times a week. It is hard, but even though I know she is a hypochondriac, you never know when one of her complaints is legit so I still try to be supportive when I hear about it.

[happiMom87]

Oh no I'm sorry to read this, I think maybe if you're dad never dealt with this with other women like your mom or sisters if you have them then maybe he doesn't understand the facts medically speaking. I hope you feel better and I'm glad you're hubby is supporting you, stay positive there's really no point in getting upset although it's easier said than done. I wish you well and rest as much you can!!