Do we ever get to relax?

[Dani711]

As some of you may know I opted out of the NT test and am having my u/s on Tues. just to see how things are going. I think it is great for those who have gone through with the test and everthing is great.  But I was just reading on the June babies how women who have had the NT test, are now having issues with their next u/s and things coming up with a possible problem.  My question is if there is any time other than when we deliver (and sometimes even later) that we know that everything is going to be OK?  I spent the first 10 weeks of this pregnancy worried about a m/c, and now I am so worried that something will be wrong again.  I just want to start to enjoy this pregancy and know that I will be able to actually hold my baby in my arms.  I had all these wonderful dreams last time, and they were crushed, and I just want to be able to shop for my baby and feel good about everything.  Am I the only one who is always worried?

[YvetteY]

I worry all the time.  Worry about miscarriage, worry about this and worry about that.  I have about 10 worries right now going on and I don't think I will stop (worry about the pregnancy) until the baby comes out.

I liked it better back in 1990 when I had my first baby.  I know nothing , didn't know I was pregnant until the end of my first trimester, and was blisfully ignorant about what can go wrong.

Here are my worries (LOL)...just learned about vasa previa, diabetes (me), miscarriage, GS being too small,  chromosomal problems, preeclampsia, that the doc doesn't have me taking the right amt of lovenox, gaining too much weight quickly, being tired all the time, baby will stop growing, etc. etc.  

[Dani711]

pookie- oh, I am so sorry.  I know exactley the feeling you are having about being more disconnected.  Last time when they told me there was a problem, I just stopped all dreaming of the baby in the future.  Now this time, although I already love my baby, I have not bought anything yet.  Someone asked me if I am reading to the baby yet and I had to tell them that I wouldn't let myself do that type of stuff until I know everything is going to be ok.  It is just so hard.  By the time I did my NT test last time, all they had to do was look at the u/s and tell me there was no chance, which in a way was a relief for me since I never really had to make a hard decesion.  

I really wish you the best and let us know how everything is going.  Don't lose hope until you know more!  And I understand the constant worry, I think about it all day and all night...it is tortue!

[pookie1121]

Tell me about it. We also decided against any testing that didnt give us concrete results or anything that was invasive.  So that just about ruled out most tests, including the NT scan.

But like I posted in a question earlier today, during a routine US, the doctor told us that although it is too early for a NT scan anyways, she sees that there is fluid built up around both my twins necks!  She made it sound like we had a diagnosis of down or some other chromosonal problem, said she was sorry about the news, etc.... we were devastated and so was my husband.  

Now we are faced with trying to decide whether to do the NT scan next week or not, and maybe doing other testing that we wouldnt have normally done just for peace of mind sake.  I feel more disconnected with my babies since she mentioned that - not because I think about ending the pregnancy or anything like that, but just like, what if something happens or we get worse news.  I cant think about anything but the health of the babies now.  We most likely wouldnt do anything if the results of test were abnormal, but still.... i dont think it is healthy to worry for antoher 29 weeks.  It is probably better to know and start to think about how to deal with it.

Sorry about rambling.... just got so much going through my head, and I sooooo wish I could stop worrying :)

[JAXX55]

i think its totally normal. I had a m/c back in April(08), and I'm still worrying too.  I hope everything works out for you. :)

[colorado_g]

they said kidney pain my cause early contractions so it is possible that they will have to put some pipe to my kidney so it wont happened for last couple days i am on tylenol i dont want to take nth stronger for baby sick so i am sufferring fom a strong not stop pain. i will discuss that tuesday wih my ob and i will follow up with urology

[Dani711]

Thanks guys, it's nice to know that we all worry.  Hopefully after the u/s on Tues I will relax a bit more if things go well, then I think after the 18 week u/s if all goes well again I will finally be able to shop for things and feel like it may really happen this time.  I just can't imagine going through this all again and not getting a baby out of it.  I made it just about this far last time, but I sure wasn't sick like I was this time!  Good luck to everyone, and I just can't wait until we all start to have our babies :)

colorado-did they tell you that you may go early because of your kidney?

Kaprovea- I also can't wait until we start feeling the baby kick, I have no idea what it is going to be like, but I can't wait.  Remind me of that when the baby is keeping me up all night from kicking LOL!

[jenkaye21]

Yes, it is SO normal to worry.  I have had three healthy pregnancies with NO complications, ending in 3 very healthy babies, and I STILL worry!  
I think its because we are in that "in between" time; its four weeks between dr visits- 4 weeks without hearing the heartbeat!- and probably not yet feeling movement, at least on a regular basis.
From what I remember, my worrying dropped dramatically once I started feeling baby move everyday; hope this happens for you, too!
Remember, the vast majority of pregnancies end in a healthy mom and baby; odds are in our favor!!

[colorado_g]

i kow its hard to relax i am going nuts with worries tht I will get contractions early due to my kidney, but then i am sitting and telling myself everythig will be ok, jly or august i will enjoy my precious baby , we just have to stay positive:) for us and the most for the baby.

Good Luck, and belive that everything will be o

[kaprovea]

Yes I am also worried all the time.  I think that is something that comes with the fact that we can't see what is going on inside our bodies.  We only get reassurance when we see the u/s.  I think that we will start to feel better when we can feel the baby moving.  Then we will atleast know that the thing inside of us is still living and moving.