Pregnancy: Feb 2009 Babies Community
ok i was wondering .....
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ok i was wondering .....

Hello my  med help  friends  just checking into  see how everyone is  doing?  I was sitting here  wondering how everyone else's Dh are doign with  adjusting to the  new life? Well seeing as this ismy  Dh frist baby and my third i was thinking that when i had my frist my life completely changed and   it changed again when  i hadmy  second and my third but  it seems like my  Dh  doesnt want to change anything about his life.even though he has  now  a wife and three kids.  Maybe i am  just  in the need of a good vent  so sorry if this  becomes like one.  Well  He loves his daughter there is no doubt about that  but i dont think he knew how much his life would be different. It seems like everytime i have a day off he  wants to go out  with friends instead of stayin home. Now i am not against him going out  with his friends we all need time to be ourselves and have what i like to call adult time out with other adults no kids involved. but it seems likehe always is  running out the  door. Now i ahve tried asking him about it but he   doesnt hink he is doign something that is up seeting me even though i try to tellhim that  it  does of he does  everytime   i have a day  off.   I dont know maybe it is the lack of sleep  causing me to think this way .    It just  seems that i  never get the  chance to  go and do something i want to  do  i always  have to bring the kids. Now i  usually bring the kids with me everywhere an di never  have an issue with that  but sometime i jsut want the chance to  take a shower with out someone inthe bathroom with me lol.  It jst seems  like i am the one who has adjusted everything and he has  adjusted nothing.    He goes when i am home with kids and stay there  wiht all the kids and get them already forbed then i  sit  and do laundry  or whatever needs to be done.  i  laugh and tell everyone ihave two full time  jobs and one the them i work 24 hours a day ( and love doing) and the other one  pays for the frist job. Seems like the only time i  get to have adult  and not bring the kids with me  is when i am at work  even then that is  not somethingi want to do. I have talked tohim about this and doesnt seem to  think there is problem. IS there one or  am i  just being  silly? i dont know  soryr ladies if i am  venting just needed to  get it out. But is  anyone having issues with their DH not wanting to  compromise on  soemthings?
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231441_tn?1333896366
No DH for me!

Benefit of being a single mum, I guess. Kinda.  I am friends with baby's father though.  

He told me the other day that I couldn't possibly have more kids (still want another) becuase I'm spending too much time on this one!!  What does he expect!  She's only 4 months old!  He has no idea! I should just leave her with a nanny! (that is possible in Philippines)....

Thinks my breastfeeding this baby still is going overboard and is annoyed because I can't travel for work because I don't have enough milk stored to leave for baby for more than one night. And still keeps asking me and getting annoyed when I say no.

But my sisters have the same grumbles... their hubbies still have their own lives and activities while my sister's lives belong to the kids and it takes a super effort.

Not easy.
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525485_tn?1314364901
I cannot complain in this department. DH and I work opposite schedules. I work M-F, 8-430 and he works Sat, Sun & Mon, 6a-6p. So, DH works....and then Tu-Fr he is Daddy Day care and he LOVES his time with Sarah....he does no complain and he seems to worok his schedule around her. He is VERY attached to her and wont let me put her in her own room yet...which I plan on doing before the May month ends!
He definetely likes his free time when I get home though..which I dont mind..bc he has been with her all day...and its my time to spend time with her at that point!
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501796_tn?1253331994
It seems like mine is the same way. He wants to do his thing. But he does love his little girl and this our first one each. When we had her he helped all the time. Then he started to slack off till I finally had to say something. And on top of that he doesnt like to work. He had a great career till we had her. He gave it up too for her. He want to insure that he would be around for her and his family. He was a police officer. I dont have any adult time. Since I work in parks and recreation and I am at the softball fields alot he is out there with me. He plays ball. So I have to work and watch her too. And I am trying to start a career of my own now. Which may not be the right career I should have since we both plan on having more kids. EMT.
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341551_tn?1266984330
I can't complain with this department either. If anything DH is a better father than I could have ever imagined! I am still home with Caiden so he works all day but as soon as he comes home he can't wait to hold and kiss him! They have this daddy son time everynight where Mommy goes works out and runs errands. He can't get enough time with him. He has totally re-arranged his schedule and life for him...and he loves it. He too did not want Caiden in his own room! Their so attached, its adorable. I think if anything I am having more trouble adjusting...I was so used to doing whatever I wanted and I was a busy gal to begin with...so its been difficult for me but not at all for DH. He's been absolutely wonderful. And we had many difficulties when Caiden was newborn..gas issues, formula issues, colic, sleeping and hubby was fantastic through it all. He would often take the baby during one of his screaming fits and let me take a nice bath and watch a movie to relax. I'm so grateful for my hubby, he's been awesome!
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543966_tn?1234739568
My hubby has been incredible too....like Gina said, he's doing even better than I had imagined. He works long days at a stressful job to enable me to stay home with our Annabelle, so I don't expect him to always help out with her when he gets home, it's not his place. I think he's changed 5 diapers in all, and that's fine with me, I'm grateful to him for those 5! He does love his little girl, and plays with her and talks to her all the time in a "baby" voice, which he swore up and down he would never do, ha! But most of all he loves and cherishes and supports me, both financially and emotionally, which does a lot more for me than him changing more diapers or getting up at night with the baby!
Our marriage isn't perfect, but it's pretty incredible, and I thank God for my husband every single day!
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643558_tn?1258406109
Oh, my husband is soo awesome...you can tell he loves Nathan more than he could ever love another human being or himself!!  I knew that he would feel that way, but to see it happen is just awesome!!  

My Husband is home all day with Nathan, and works all night...living on about 3-5 hours of sleep daily, and then catches up on the weekend, with no complaint.  I just pump a bottle for him the day before, and the morning before I leave...and I feed him right before I leave...so he has plenty of breastmilk to feed him throughout the day, and he textes me each time he eats, so I can go pump...

My husband knows Nathan's behaviors more than I do...it is so cute, he will say, "Oh that is his dirty diaper cray..."  and he has little coos that he only does with Dad, they sing together, and he constantly has his eyes on Dad...just smiling up a storm, there is soo much love there...  I couldn't have a better husband!!
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