Having a Difficult Pregnancy... Anyone else, too?

[rvaughn]

So, this is my second baby. My first was born alive at 21w5d with no explanation as to what caused my pre-term labor at the time. He was a perfectly healthy 1lb and 11in long baby, just too premie. I was having what I thought were Braxton Hicks the entire day before and called the doctor because it didn't seem right and I was told I was most likely dehydrated, to put my feet up, and drink some water. At 2am I woke up bleeding profusely with extreme abdominal pain and was admitted to L&D 4cms dialated with a partial placental abrubtion, resulting in my son being born early.

On a positive note, I've changed doctors and my current one is absolutely incredible. I'm now 23w4d with my little girl. At 7 weeks I was diagnosed with an extremely rare blood clotting disorder that doesn't have a specific name, which resulted in me having to do a Lovenox injection nightly to prevent any clotting. At 16 weeks I started contracting again and immediately notified my doctor of the familiar feeling. He had me come into his office, he checked everything out, and he continued to take weekly cervical measurements to catch any change that could possibly be occurring. In 2 weeks my cervix had gone from 3.5cm to 1.8cm. Two days later (after my Lovenox had gotten out of my system) I had an emergency cerclage done at 18w2d. Since then, I have continued to contract on and off and have been taking Nifedipine to stop them. At 22w5d I started to contract every 3mins while on the medication and was admitted to the hospital for a Magnesium Sulfate IV drip... I responded almost immediately and stopped contracting. I had hardly any side effects (which is very uncommon). After 14 hours, they stopped the drip. Of course, I had 3 contractions within the first hour of stopping it, so we tried taking the Nifedipine again. Within 2 hours, I developed horrible chest pain that lasted 12 hours due to the combination of the 2 medications. After a serious of tests were done and any cardiac issues were ruled out, I was kept for observation another day and a half. Finally, after 5 days I was discharged. I came home Saturday afternoon. It's now Monday morning and unfortunatey I woke up to painful contractions again at 4am. My doctor is starting right back at square one with the medications as a last resort before I have to go back to the hospital again...

I have high hopes and a good feeling that this little one will make it just fine. But I feel like I am a completely incompetent baby maker at this point. I feel horribly for my husband for having to stand back and watch and feel useless. I feel like pregnancy should not be this stressful or frustrating. Is there anyone out there going through something complicated or similar like this? I'm in need of support at this point.

[SunWorshiper_26]

Lil_lady, I am so sorry that you have had to go through all of this stress an anxiety. You nor any of us on here deserve to be put through this stress. I know that everyone loves their babies but I think that those of us who have been put through such trials to get to this point have a special meaning to pregnancy and our children.

I know two people who seemed almost to take for granted pregnancy. They complained the entire time felt they deserved their babies, both announced their pregnancies as soon as they peed on the stick. They said that miscarriage won't ever happen to them. Then both ended up having a miscarriage. They both now say they will never take pregnancy for granted. They both said they have a different understanding of pregnancy, the respect and cherish the miracle of birth in a way they never did. I think that we also respect and cherish pregnancy and these babies more than anyone could ever understand because we have worked SO hard to get to this point.

I wish you all the best in a happy and healthy stressfree remaining months of pregnancy. I can't wait till we are all holding our beautiful babies in our arms and sharing pictures of their beautiful faces :)

[lil_lady25]

I haven't had that much difficulties but have been worried sick the entire pregnancy so far. We first got pregnant back in November and baby stopped developing at 9 weeks - had a D&C to remove remains. Got pregnant once again in February/March and unfortunately had another miscarriage - passed everything naturally. This pregnancy was very hard to accept because of our prior losses. You never want to forget the babies you lost nor ever replace them. Went in at 5 weeks to get HCG levels checked and they were very high so nurse thought it could be ectopic. Tried to be optomistic but it was hard. Fortunately, next HCG was raising appropriately but was still high, now they say it could be multiples. 7 week ultrasound they confirmed two sacs and two babies. We were estatic that we were having twins. The u/s tech said that one was about a week behind and they will monitor us closely to make sure he/she catches up with the other. Week 16 had major cramping and pressure pains - was advised to go to Labor and Delivery because I was having contractions (was scared out of our minds) and turns out it was a false alarm. 18 week u/s doctor tells us that smaller baby is still about 4 days behind and it may be chromosomal abnormities. We opt out of testing but she insists that we get tested for Trisomy 21 (downs). So we do the testing and have to wait about a week for the results which is like torture - we didnt want to know but now that we did the testing we were worried. Tested negative for trisomy 21 thank goodness. 23 weeks along strong cramping comes back along with some major back pain. Doctor insists I go to the Emergency room to be checked out. Cramps went away so we opted out and everything is okay. We were already worried sick this entire pregnancy because of our history and just the little things that we've been through so far makes me believe that this will be our one and only pregnancy. I dont think I can do this all again physically, mentally and emotionally. I just can't wait until we all have our healthy babies in our arms - but yet I doubt the worry for our children will ever go away. I'm so glad to have met some very wonderful woman on this site though where I can share my experiences and support with.

[GBen]

Hi there,
First of all, I'm so sorry to hear about everyone's difficult pregnancies. Pregnancy is difficult enough without complications but it can be so stressful when there are problems.
I have had 2 pregnancies that were textbook. No problems or complications other than my first was breech so I had a c-section and my second I did a successful VBAC but with 3rd degree tears.
I got pregnant in January and unfortunately I had a missed miscarriage at 12 wks.  I then got pregnant again in May and I am currently 21wk2days. At 14 1/2 wks I woke up with excessive bleeding and was convinced I had lost the baby. I went to the ER and there was a hb and my cervix was closed.  I had 2 U/S after that and they showed that I have a large subchorionic hemorrhage.  I just had a repeat u/s at 20 wks and the hemorrhage is still there and still large although it is shrinking a tiny bit.  The baby was growing well and there was a nice strong hb.  I have been spotting since 15 wks and everyday I worry that I will lose this baby too.
My OB and midwife have gone over the risks and concerns and have described preterm labour and placental abruption to me, but at this point, should either of those happen, there is nothing that could be done to save my baby.  I have been told that a baby has a chance at survival after 24wks but with serious complications.  I am so worried.  
I have been on bed rest since the bleed and my 2 sons are confused why I can't care for them the way I do normally.  
I didn't do the triple screen marker test with this baby because I couldn't handle the extra stress and if they wanted me to do amnio I wouldn't have done it because my placenta is already in a compromised condition.
I'm trying to take things one day at a time but the stress is definitely really difficult to endure as is the constant worry.  I'm staying as positive a possible but I have never been more aware of how precious life is as it grows inside of you.
I hope and pray that all of you continue to have healthy pregnancies without further complications and that at the end of all this we will all finally be able to have our healthy babies in our arms.

[rvaughn]

I've been on "minimal activity" and off work since I had the cerclage at 18 weeks, but not bedrest. Without an incompetent cervix or any correlation between my activity and contractions, my doctor says that bedrest hasn't been proven to be truly effective. I am however, very restricted. No cooking, no cleaning, no going up and down stairs more than once a day, no carrying anything, no driving. I am allowed to get up to the bathroom and shower daily and walk to the patio to get some sunshine. And I've been on pelvic rest since 16 weeks. I'm now 23w5d. I'm such a Type A person, too, so this is extremely difficult for me to lay around and do nothing. I sympathize for my husband because he's not only working his typical 10-12 hour days still, he's now stressing about me and the baby, taking care of out 2 kitties, cooking, cleaning the house, doing the laundry, etc. The doctor said it's likely I won't carry full-term, so that's also stressful knowing that at any moment she could come. It changes our entire birth plan. I am fortunate there is no bleeding or blood pressure issues or anything else serious. But I wish we could figure out what is causing my contractions and stop them. It's discouraging.

[SunWorshiper_26]

What a stressful pregnancy :(. I am not having that much of a difficult time. I have been having trouble though. First it was a miscarriage then 34 months of ttc and right before finally getting pregnant I fractured my spine and pelvis. I am now 22 weeks pregnant with two spinal fractures, one pelvic fracture which is a LOT of pain I am also considered high risk and have poly cystic ovarian syndrome. I also spent the first four months of pregnancy puking even with anti nausea meds I was still puking. Then at my 20 week ultrasound they said baby has echogenic bowel which is a sign of a virus or Down's syndrome or other chromosomal abnormalities which could lead to still birth. So I was rushed to have bloodwork done and an amnio which I did not want to have done but had to do. Then I was on bedrest for a week. Now I go back to my OB tomorrow to discuss what's next. Final results on why baby has echogenic bowel are not back yet. It seems like one thing after another. But hopefully this will all be ok in the end and we will both have our beautiful babies in our arms happy and healthy.

[trying43]

I am sorry you are having such a difficult time.  I had one episode of contractions which thankfully stopped.  I am 20w5d with a little girl.  Are you on bedrest?  I was with my first son for 5 months due to a hematoma then later high blood pressure and for 3 months with my second son for blood pressure again.  I hope all turns out ok and it sounds like you have a dr who is on top of things.  Good luck to you.