OT...had my baby shower....

[trying43]

Overall it was good, a lot of people who said they were going to come, didnt so was a little let down, ok a lt let down.  I was upset with my family mostly, my 2 cousins who i am close with didnt show, bother to call, send a gift, nothing.  I went to one of their showers and sent a gift to the other. Only 3 total of my family showed, my mom and 2 aunts.  The aunts who hate each other, were there and making little comments to each other.(they hate each other because one is a pill popper and she does have legit issues but abuses it, the other is sucessful and doesnt have those issues) My mom was mad, made comments about not being asked to help with the shower.  Also my friend since he 3rd grade didnt show, claimed the weather was a factor, the night before we had a feeze but the roads were totally clear and dry and it warmed up to 65!  She only lives 20 miles from me so, that wasnt the real reason, not to offend anyone but shes into that Wican(sp?) crap and didnt want to go into a baptist church is what I think, she was raised baptist.  She had made he comment a few days before about why I had to have it at a church and if she went in she would burs into flames.... AND lastly we really didnt get hardly anything off our registry(7 things out of 90) so now we still have to buy a basinet, cosleeper, swing, car seat, stroller, plus a lot of the small stuff like burp rags, sleep positioner, sheets, changing pad and covers, etc.  Not trying to sound ungrateful at all by any means, just was a little bummed and have no clue where we are going to get the money to buy all the things we need.  Hubby already works 3 jobs and I am a SAHM.  Guess tomorrow will be checking the resale shops but still not sure about the money thing. We did get plenty of clothes, diapers, lotion, baby wash, stuff  like that.  My good friends really stepped up and helped out so I was really grateful.  I didnt have money for hostess gifts but I got each one a really nice card that I picked out for each person and wrote a message in each about what that person meant to me and how much I appreciated them.  Do you think that was okay or tacky?  Should I maybe ty to do something else for each person?  I thought about makeing each person their favorite treat, they love my homemade brownies(have an awesome recipe off the old hershey cocoa can, its to die for) Anyway, just mainly seeing what ya'll thought.(yes i say ya'll im from Texas dont hold it against me, lol)  Hoping to win the lottery......

[SunWorshiper_26]

Congrats to your hubby!!  Mine has been there six years, he is a ranger officer, K9, evidence tech and law enforcement psych training. So far his favorite is having a dog :). I love it too our dog is wonderful. I'm surprised at how many women I've come across that are married to an officer on this site. I usually don't talk about it bc some people hate the police so much better safe than sorry but it's always so nice to meet another officers wife. One of the other women on these group is an officers wife too!

[trying43]

I think thats why I was panicing, because next week on wednesday at the latest we will have a baby.  Thats so cool our DHs are in the same profession!  Mine just got promoted to sergent last month and works 9pm to 7am. More responsibility but hes happy with it. How long has he been an officer?  Dh has been one for 17 years, the last 8 at the same department.

[SunWorshiper_26]

Trying I am so glad that everything is working out!  Our husbands have the same profession. My husband works power shift 2pm-2am he also has a K9 :)

[rccresswell]

That is so great to hear!!!!  I am glad everything has worked out.  I guess it can be very scary especially so close to your due date.  I really hope I am having a girl because I bought heaps of second hand clothes for a girl but I only have a few if I have a boy.  Thankfully my friend said she will keep her boys clothes if I do need them so I am a bit lucky in that department.

I can see how your expectations can be different especially with your first baby shower.  It is so nice to hear about other supportive husbands that would work 10 jobs so that their wives/partners can stay at home without a guilty trip.  I am very fortunate my husband feels the same way and I think you just do what you can with what you have.

Goodluck and not too long to go.  I am so exhausted and am now hoping this baby comes sooner rather than later lol.  I had a midwife appointment and it took me 5 minutes to put my two kids in the car.  My daughter went and sat on the other side of the door behind the drivers side door so I couldn't get her the little poo!!!!!!!!!!!

Have a great week

[trying43]

We got some good news today, Dhs mom gave us extra money so we were able to get all the essentials except 1 thing but I found used for half price.  YEA!!! I was also able to buy stuff with a $50 gift card, it went further than I thought. As far as cosleeping, had the cosleeper with my boys so they werent actually in the bed with me, and it made nursing so much easier, plus DH works midnites so its not like its a bother.  I had a pack and play and never used it too much trouble, the only reason for the basinette is because her room is at one end of the house and during the day, im in the living room a lot and no moniter yet and when we travel it would be nice.  My mom did pick me up one today, a travel basinette, at walmart for 40 bucks I think.  We would never get a used stroller or carseat, DH is a policeman and did all the carseat stuff for the department for awhile and he also volunteers on the board at a child advocate/counciling center so knows about the stroller stuff too. So it all worked out but thanks for the suggestions.

Not offended at all reccresswell, I had one shower with my first son(it was huge lots of people and gifts maybe thats why I was kinda letdown), didnt have one with my second, had all the stuff, only reason I had another with this one is because people wanted to do it and because I was having a girl and because it had been so long, we had nothing.  We got tons of clothes and diapers so she wont be naked or dirty. Ordinarily we would be able to afford stuff but we had some unexpected bills come up medical mostly, health insurance went up in order to keep the good coverage, baseball for the kids(signup fee and equipment is expensive etc....Thats why he is working the extra jobs to pay them) DH doesnt want me to work at all so he says if he has to get 10 jobs he will. (Besides, I wouldnt be working right now anyway, my field is also law enforcement) I feel very lucky that we are both on the same page when it comes to me staying home with the kids.

Tomorrow I plan on baking my hostesses the brownies.  Well and one chicken and sausage gumbo, lol, one of my hostess likes that better.    I think I was mainly worried and having a pity party but things have worked out.

[rccresswell]

I honestly think things must be completely different between America and New Zealand/Australia where I live.  I have only had one baby shower and that was for my first.  I only had a handful of people come, if I remember correctly I think about 15 people.  All of my gifts were blankets, clothes, baby products, nappies etc.  I have never heard of a baby registry and would ask for the big stuff such as strollers, carseat, bassinettes, monitors etc.

My husband and I bought everything like that for our baby.  My inlaws gave us the bassinette my husband and sister in law used when they were babies and a second hand pram.  My mum bought us a 100 dollar portacot but apart from that we bought everything.  We are not wealthy either.  We were both working but we had to save so I could be a stay at home mum and even when I was a stay at home mum we had to defer our mortgage repayments for 3 months so we could afford to make ends meet and we ended up selling our house and moving to another country so life was a bit easier for us.

With this baby I am thankful I have most things I need.  I do have a few more things I need to get but the baby will survive if I don't have it.  I am still a stay at home mum but we are a bit more financially secure now that my hubby has a new job and the assistance we get from the government enable us to not live comfortably but to make ends meet ie put food on the table and buy my kids what they need.

I really hope I don't sound rude or offend you.  I have heard of a lot of mums talk about their baby showers - maybe the expectations are different here than they are there.  I guess it is the same as Halloween or Valentiines (We don't really celebrate it here and my hubby and I refuse to celebrate Valentines day)

I love the idea of baking something.  It doesn't matter how much they cost its the thought that counts!!!!!  I never knew you had to give the person a gift because we don't do that they so my sister missed out lol.  I also loved the idea of the cards - they are both lovely ideas that you used and I would APPRECIATE both all the same :)

[SunWorshiper_26]

I say y'all too and I was born and raised in Chicago lol!  

I didn't get a lot off my registry either BUT the week after the shower the people who couldnt make it sent gifts from the registry. Also my parents and sister got us things from the registry. Other than that people got us random stuff I mean I have more newborn diapers than I'll ever use, more wash clothes than days in the month and seven "lovie" animals. I have two newborn bathrobes um why does a newborn need ONE bathrobe!?!   So I went to babies r us and returned a TON of cr@p and then used the gift cards to buy things like sheets and the rocking chair. We don't have a ton of money either. My suggestion is get essentials then after baby is born get what people don't give as gifts. We got a lot of gifts after Ellie was born I mean a LOT. Cousins who RSVPed yes and didn't show and aunts who never RSVPed they came out of the woodwork and sent gifts and cards.

I think the homemade brownies are a GREAT idea!  It's nice to have something that comes from the heart.

Talk to friends who are older who maybe are done having children?  I bought a ton second hand from a friend who has two children and is done having kids. I have another friend who has pretty much everything bc she has four kids and said please get this stuff out of my house. So talk to people with children already.

Things you don't want to buy are a sleep positioner or bumped pads for a crib both of these things have been linked to SIDS. Your infant isn't going anywhere so a sleep positioner is not necessary. Bumper pads same as the positioner can cause suffocation and SIDS.  

We got a pack and play which has a bassinet. You don't need a co sleeper and bassinet baby can't sleep in two places at once ;). If you decide to co sleep please read up on how to safely co sleep otherwise it can lead to SIDS

You can buy most things used but not a crib or carseat. Dropside cribs have all been recalled and the safety standards have recently changed as for car seats new safer and better ones comes out all the time. Also if a carseat is ever in an accident it must be replaced so if you are in a car accident call your insurance co car insurance usually covers a new one.

I hope I helped some. Please let me know if i can help anymore. I'm so sorry there was such disappointment at your shower :(